The following is an article from Uncle John's Slightly Irregular Bathroom Reader.

From the "Dustbin of History" files, here's the pungent tale of two midwest states whose pride and honor were once challenged...by a slab of stinky cheese.



IT AIN'T EASY BEING CHEESY

It began in the winter of 1935 when a doctor in Independence, Iowa, prescribed an odd medicine to an ailing farm wife: Limburger cheese. The doctor figured the heavily aromatic cheese would help clear the woman's clogged sinuses. (If you don't know what Limburger smells like, give it a whiff the next time you're at the supermarket.) So the order was put through to Monroe, Wisconsin, to send some Limburger cheese-post haste.

Why Monroe? Swiss cheesemakers first arrived there in 1845. At the time, Wisconsin was in the depths of an economic depression and cheese helped pull them out of it.By 1910, Wisconsin had become the cheese-making capital of the United States, producing more cheese than any other state. And Monroe was the Limburger capital of Wisconsin.

THE BATTLE LINES ARE DRAWN

Monroe's postmaster, John Burkhard, approved the delivery and sent it on its way. But the mail carrier in Independence, Iowa, who delivered the Limburger was so offended by the stench wafting through his roadster that he refused to deliver it. Citing a postal rule that said mail would only be delivered if it "did not smell objectionable," Independence's postmaster, Warren Miller, concurred without examining or even smelling the cheese. He had it sent back to Monroe on the grounds that it could "fell an ox twenty paces."

Burkhard took it personally; to insult Limburger is to insult not just Monroe, but all of Wisconsin and its proud cheese heritage. So Burkhard rewrapped the package and sent it back to Iowa. Miller promptly returned it to Wisconsin. War was brewing.

THE BATTLE OF DUBUQUE

Burkhard took his gripe all the way to the United States Postmaster General in Washington, D.C. At first, he couldn't understand what all the fuss was about. So Burkhard sent him some Limburger.  The Postmaster general then decided that, yes, the cheese smelled bad, but no, it wasn't hazardous. And the war was over, right? Wrong.

By this time the press had sniffed out the story. At a time when the nation was mired in the Great Depression and Hitler was rising to power in Germany, a story about smelly cheese was a breath of fresh air. And unwilling to give in, postmaster Burkhard challenged postmaster Miller to a "cheese-smelling duel"-if Miller could sit at a table and not wretch from the stench of freshly-cut Limburger, then he would never again raise a stink about Wisconsin and its cheese. Miller accepted. Dozens of people from each town-as well as a throng of reporters-showed up at the Julien Hotel in Dubuque, Iowa, on the cold afternoon of March 8, 1935, to witness the standoff.

A Duel to the Breath

The two sat across from each other at a table. While flashbulbs flickered and onlookers whispered, Burkhard placed a box on the table, unwrapped it, and produced a very strong sample of his state's pride and joy, praising not only its medicinal qualities, but boasting that nothing on Earth tasted better with beer. The tension was so thick that you could cut it with a knife. Famed Milwaukee Journal reporter Richard S. Davis sent out a dispatch, calling it a "duel to the breath."

As Burkhard prepared to push the slab of cheese over to Miller, he offered Miller a clothespin and a gas mask. But Miller just shook his head and meekly surrendered. "I won't need that clothespin," he lamented, "I haven't any sense of smell."

The crowd gasped. The battle was over before it began. Burkhard was immediately declared the winner, and Miller had to agree to allow any and all Wisconsin cheese safe passage through Iowa's postal routes. The next day newspapers in 30 states ran a picture of the olfactorily-challenged Miller looking bewildered next to a piece of steaming Limburger. And now the war was over, right? Wrong. The final battle was yet to come.

THE BATTLE OF BEAVER DAM

While Burkhard was basking in victory, something he'd said about Limburger at that table in Dubuque-that nothing tasted better with beer-was churning through Miller's head. Every good Iowan knew that the best food to eat with beer was smoked whitefish, not some stinky piece of cheese. Miller just couldn't let it go. So he challenged Burkhard with another contest: a fight for the title of "Best Snack in the World." Once again the press got whiff of the food feud, and they convened at the neutral site chosen for the contest: the American Legion Hall in Beaver Dam, Wisconsin.

This confrontation was even more serious than the first-now there were judges. And with so much at stake, both sides used underhanded tactics; they bribed the judges with beer. The fish-heads bought a round, then the cheese-heads. And once all palates were properly whetted, the showdown began.

Carnage

First came the sliced Limburger with beer. Then the Iowans gave the judges smoked whitefish...and more beer. The battle raged on: Limburger and beer, whitefish and beer. Limburger and beer, whitefish and beer. Finally, when the judges could eat or drink no more, they sent the least-inebriated member of their panel to the podium: "The judgeth have reached a dethision. It was unamus... unans... they all said the same darn thing! Cheese'n beer s'wunnerful. Fishes'n beer s'wunnerful, too. But when you have Limburger cheese and smoked whitefish and beer, heck, it don't get no better than that!"

Both sides were declared victorious, Burkhard and Miller retained their respective states' honor, and Limburger cheese had risen from  being referred to as "hazardous material" to holding the co-title of "Best Snack in the World."

VICTORY PARADE

That October, Monroe, Wisconsin, held its annual Cheese Day parade. All the press coverage from the Limburger cheese war made it the biggest Cheese Day ever. Fifty thousand people showed up to bask in the glory-including the farmer's wife (who had healed quite nicely). Warren Miller came all the way from Iowa and was given a place of honor in the parade-right next to his friend John Burkhard.

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The article above is reprinted with permission from Uncle John's Slightly Irregular Bathroom Reader, a fantastic book by the Bathroom Readers' Institute.

The 17th book in this the Bathroom Reader series is filled to the brim with facts, fun, and fascination, including articles about the Origin of Kung Fu, How to Kill a Zombie, Women in Space and more!

Since 1988, the Bathroom Reader Institute had published a series of popular books containing irresistible bits of trivia and obscure yet fascinating facts.

If you like Neatorama, you'll love the Bathroom Reader Institute's books - go ahead and check 'em out!

A candle made out of an orange? I think I'd like to try this. The ingredients are things you probably have around the house now, and the instructions are so simple they are related almost completely in photographs at Snowhite Blog. Link -Thanks, Kittens Pet Team!

This is a perfect tool for teaching my kids their algebraic order of operations! Oh, they can do them, but I think this will help them understand the concept better. Find this "s'more formula" on a t-shirt at W00t. Link -via Laughing Squid

Here's a roundup of sixteen animals and how you can see them in their natural habitats. Some of these expeditions involve a lot of travel, depending on where you are already. Want to see a booby? Head to the Galapagos Islands!

A little more than 500 miles west of Ecuador lie the Galápagos Islands, a veritable treasure-trove of endemic wildlife. One of the islands’ most famous residents is the blue-footed booby, a seabird with distinctive turquoise-blue feet. While those colorful toes certainly catch the eyes of human fans, the birds are more concerned with impressing each other: Male blue-footed boobies show off their blue feet while “dancing” during courtship.

Link -Thanks, Jenny!

(vimeo link)

If growing a beard were only this simple in the real world! This stop-motion film by Ian Robertson looks as if a lot of time went into it, both in recording and editing. -via the Presurfer

A cat in Leatherhead, Surrey, England had to be rescued from a tree by the fire department. That in itself is not newsworthy, but the firefighters also rescued a rescuer! A 6-year-old Maine Coon cat named Jadis was 30 feet up in a fir tree, afraid to come down. So owner Mike Wall, after trying other methods with neighbor Michael Jordan, climbed a ladder to get her while his wife Chris watched.

Mr Jordan said: "It was really difficult getting the ladder up and then it twisted against the trunk, which made it awkward to get back down safely from that high."

With Mr Wall in the same predicament as Jadis, the fire brigade were eventually called to the rescue at about 2.40pm.

Mrs Wall said: "He wasn't very happy. He was up there for about 40 minutes, so it definitely wore him out."

Thankfully it didn't take much longer until both Mr Wall and Jadis were safely back on terra firma and the firefighters didn't go home empty handed.

Mrs Wall said: "The neighbours were wonderful and I kissed the fireman when he came down and then burst into tears. I hadn't any wine so I gave them a bag of cat biscuits as a small thank you because one of them had cats himself."

Link -via Arbroath

We've officially said goodbye to summer and are heading into fall 2010. Let's see what happened at Neatorama this week, just in case you may have missed something.

We retraced the history of the Vietnam Veteran's Memorial in Washington, D.C. with Building the Wall from Uncle John's Bathroom Reader.

The Annals of Improbable Research gave us a dose of silliness with Spots Where the Spotted Were Spotted.

A Celebration of Elephants rounded up some of the previous reports we've had about the amazing things elephants can do.

From mental_floss, we looked at the origins and inspirations of George Lucas' opus with In The Beginning: Star Wars.

Steven Johnson added more to the Museum of Possibilities this week with ideas for Car Trunks and Drawers.

Don't miss our exclusive Interview with Artist Kasey McMahon, and your chance to win a ticket to her new science/art expo call Re Evolution! Yes, the contest is still open.

Over at the Art Blog, we welcomed a new gallery from collage artist Megan Coyle. Check it out!

NeatoBambino is Neatorama's blog about babies and children. Even if you don't have any, you'll enjoy the funny kid videos, like this one that humorously illustrates the intense rivalry between the University of Alabama and Auburn University.

In our What Is It? game this week, Just a Guess had the right answer, and Tyra Shupe had the funniest answer with “industrial toe nail clippers.” Congratulations to both, who won T-shirts from the NeatoShop! See the object and the real explanation at the post.

There are more ways to win you might not even know about, if you aren't following our Twitter feed or joining us at Facebook. David Israel throws out frequent but randomly-timed contests and gives away neat stuff! This week, congratulations go out to Rand Miranda and Chris Meisenzahl, who scored copies of the new Iron Man 2 Bluray/DVD set in our Twitter-only giveaway. Don't miss your chance to be the next winner!

Warning: this Lunchtime Quiz at mental_floss contains spoilers, in case you haven't seen the movie Goodfellas in the past twenty years. You probably wouldn't be able to answer the questions anyway if you haven't seen the movie. But if you have, you may just beat my score of 75%. Link

Peter Montgomery made a name for himself in Glendale, California with his over-the-top Halloween decorations. This year, he plans to build a steampunk drill emerging from the earth! This picture is the concept art. Montgomery is trying to raise the necessary funds through Kickstarter, and will give credit and other prizes to those who donate. Also see pictures and videos of his Halloween creations from years past. Link -Thanks, Will!

Physicists at the National Institute of Standards and Technology (NIST) tested Einstein's theories about relative time in a physical setting. Time goes faster at higher elevations, and slower for moving objects. The experiments involved a comparison of two identical atomic clocks.

The NIST experiments focused on two scenarios predicted by Einstein's theories of relativity. First, when two clocks are subjected to unequal gravitational forces due to their different elevations above the surface of the Earth, the higher clock—experiencing a smaller gravitational force—runs faster. Second, when an observer is moving, a stationary clock's tick appears to last longer, so the clock appears to run slow. Scientists refer to this as the "twin paradox," in which a twin sibling who travels on a fast-moving rocket ship would return home younger than the other twin. The crucial factor is the acceleration (speeding up and slowing down) of the travelling twin in making the round-trip journey.

NIST scientists observed these effects by making specific changes in one of the two aluminum clocks and measuring the resulting differences in the two ions' relative ticking rates, or frequencies.

In one set of experiments, scientists raised one of the clocks by jacking up the laser table to a height one-third of a meter (about a foot) above the second clock. Sure enough, the higher clock ran at a slightly faster rate than the lower clock, exactly as predicted.

The second set of experiments examined the effects of altering the physical motion of the ion in one clock. (The ions are almost completely motionless during normal clock operations.) NIST scientists tweaked the one ion so that it gyrated back and forth at speeds equivalent to several meters per second. That clock ticked at a slightly slower rate than the second clock, as predicted by relativity. The moving ion acts like the traveling twin in the twin paradox.

So if you want to age more slowly, you should run as fast as you can on a beach or a valley below sea level. The time you gain would not offset the difference in the time you put in, but you might live longer due to the benefit of the physical exertion. Link -via reddit

(Image credit: Loel Barr)

Today is a particularly special day in the blogosphere, as two sites that supply great links to their readers are marking ten year anniversaries. Gerard Vlemming's site, the Presurfer first began publishing on September 24, 2000. On the same day, Everlasting Blort was founded. Both sites still update, bringing you the newest, strangest, and quite interesting links from all over the web.

The Presurfer International Headquarters is closed for today. I'm having a party right now! It's not a big party because there's just me. But I'm wearing a funny little hat and there are meatballs. Because today marks the 10th anniversary of The Presurfer.

The Presurfer began 10 years ago and has evolved from a personal link page to what it is today. Is that really something to celebrate? Yes, I think it is. According to The Internet Archive the lifespan of the average web site is 44 to 75 days. The Presurfer has been here for 3,650 days.

Happy "blogiversary" to both sites from your friends at Neatorama! Link

(Image generated at Image Chef)

(YouTube link)

Nothing hits the spot like a kitten masseuse! These two are named Chloe and Bugsy, filmed when they were orphans at the Vancouver Orphan Kitten Rescue Association (VOKRA). http://www.orphankittenrescue.com/ -via Laughing Squid

The recent internet rediscovery of Marijuana Pepsi Sawyer reminds us of a few other poor souls whose parents were at a loss when filling in the birth certificate. Flavorwire tracked Sawyer and a few others down and tells their stories.

Apparently, she was named after two of her hippie parents’ favorite refreshments, and according to Sawyer, her mom’s logic went something like this: “She said that she knew when I was born that you could take this name and go around the world with it. At the time as a child, I’m thinking yeah, right. You named my older sister Kimberly. You named my younger sister Robin.” Although she struggled early on in school and endured a difficult family life, Sawyer left home at 15, became a serious student, and has now succeeded despite her name.

Also read about ESPN Montana, Ikea, Vista Avalon, and Wrigley Alexander Fields. Link

We looked at some of the influences George Lucas used to create Star Wars earlier today, but there many parts of the Star Wars universe yet to be explored. Michael Heilemann took an in-depth look at the origins and influences that inspired one particular character we all know and love: Chewbacca.

Unfortunately, perhaps because of the verisimilitude of the disciplines needed to make a film like Star Wars come together, the making-of narrative is surprisingly fragmented and often incomplete. A quick look at the bibliography needed to put together this post should give a good idea of just how fragmented. And once you’re down the rabbit hole, you quickly learn that nothing found there can be taken at face value. Quotes, drawings, photos and diagrams lack sources, are undated, some old, some new, some so distorted as to be pure fiction and most of it entirely out of context.

Heilemann's research is quite thorough, and fascinating as well. http://binarybonsai.com/2010/09/18/george-lucas-stole-chewbacca-but-its-okay/ (via Boing Boing)

(YouTube link)

We posted previously about Mark Hogancamp and the miniature world he created called Marwencol (actually more than once). The documentary film about Hogancamp and his project, also called Marwencol, has collected awards on the film festival circuit, and will be in limited theatrical release beginning on October 8th. -Thanks, Chris Shellen!