Sales plummeted as customers burst into flames, sitting under that big magnifying-glass window.
And then test dummies were invented.

Fourth: Like every other critter in Australia, this possum is highly venomous. So are their strawberries.

Australia, huh? I predict the winning name will consist of two syllables and the second syllable will be "ee".

I'm not 140 years old, but I'd also be attracted to a woman who hunts, skins, butchers, cooks, etc. They've become so rare these days.

Spinal Tap had about 2 funny lines in the entire movie. The rest was a long, boring music video that was both unfunny AND unentertaining.
And Groundhog Day isn't funny. It's an amazing, unique story, but not a funny one.

Pure hilarity, I say. Bully!

I drink tea; it tastes good from the start.

REAL men don't do this with their fists.

Amazing how much better it is when there are sound effects.

Do not: eat bait. You're a human, not a fish. Cook your animals before consuming them.

Chaotic Neutral here, too. It seems to go with the Y chromosome.

Those parents are idiots.
Diving off of a diving board IS cool, hence the name. Swimming in the pool is also cool. The only kids doing anything wrong are the two who are running in front of the lifeguard; you always run BEHIND the lifeguard so he can't see you. Duh.