What happened to all of the earth that used to occupy that hole? It seems there should be a mountain right next to the pit.

"Dogs and cats living in sin." -Peter Venkman

In the summer, I prefer to be barefooted in my house. In the winter, I leave my shoes on. Unless I stepped in dog poop.

No sugar tonight in my coffee? No sugar tonight in my tea?!?

Meh. Just more of that non-Huey Lewis music.

Dear airlines,
Feel free to bump me off of an overbooked flight. Use force, if necessary (I'm looking at you, United). I will happily settle out of court for a million bucks in exchange for a black eye and bloody nose.

The Pink Floyd references are great, but has anyone else noticed that China-NASA's logo looks a lot like a bootlegged Star Trek logo?

If you aren't on death row, then you turned out just fine.

The world's loneliest motorcycle gang.

But... how do they sell cars there if the salesmen don't all come crawling out saying, "How you folks doing today?"

Alternate title: "Alcoholic Woman Pukes 150 Times"

Looks like the talent segment of a really entertaining Miss America pageant.

Reminds me of an old Dolly Parton joke.