Husband Sends Wife a Spreadsheet Detailing His Sex Deprivation

Today, Redditor throwwwwaway29 posted a file she says her husband sent to her email during her taxi ride to the airport to catch a flight for a ten-day business trip. The Excel spreadsheet enumerates the occasions he initiated sex with her in the past five weeks (plus one day, an added bonus). Her "verbatim" responses to said initiations are included in the record. She writes,

"Yesterday morning, while in a taxi on the way to the airport, Husband sends a message to my work email which is connected to my phone. He's never done this, we always communicate in person or by text. I open it up, and it's a sarcastic diatribe basically saying he won't miss me for the 10 days I'm gone. Attached is a SPREADSHEET of all the times he has tried to initiate sex since June 1st, with a column for my "excuses", using verbatim quotes of why I didn't feel like having sex at that very moment. According to his 'document', we've only had sex 3 times in the last 7 weeks, out of 27 "attempts" on his part."

The wife requests guidance from other Redittors, since her husband has not responded to her repeated attempts to contact him since.

There is no end to the things one could say about this situation. I guess I'll go with "at least he's well organized."

Newest 5
Newest 5 Comments

Please! Just give him permission to go elsewhere - it's so much easier. I gave my husband carte blanche to get whatever he could (as long as he didn't embarrass me by being too obvious). He has a thing for actresses and country-girl types anyway - better them than me!

Who wants his old thing anyway? I have a young sailor who takes care of me when I feel the need - he's a little clumsy, but very eager to please.
Abusive comment hidden. (Show it anyway.)
I realize that, and I wasn't saying the husband wasn't partly to blame here. It's just we have these preset preconceptions of how these things work, so you gotta be careful that you're not simply playing into stereotypes. Yeah, even stereotypes can be true once in a while, but that means you gotta be that much more careful that you're going from the evidence and not the stereotype. We're just so ingrained with the notion of, "Wife's never in the mood because the husband's a total clod," that it's easy to come to that conclusion without even thinking. I mean, virtually every sitcom on the planet has played that gag for laughs. So you really need to stop and examine the situation when you take that and apply it to real life. Again, it's entirely possible, and even probable, that the husband is really more to blame here than the list lets on. I am not dismissing that. It's just we gotta tread lightly here, especially since we're only getting half the picture. We have a list with no context. Who knows what the real situation is?
Abusive comment hidden. (Show it anyway.)
That's the issue here: we just don't know anything because he failed to communicate ANYTHING about how he approaches her.

Southsidecharlie brought up a good point about this. We can infer from some of her answers that he is picking times where she would naturally have a good reason to not be in the mood, such as right after dinner or right after hitting the gym. But we can't know for sure unless he is willing to commit to some introspection and be open about it.

I don't understand why it seems like you can only accept an explanation of the dilemma if the responsibility is all on one person or the other. It's a relationship, most of the time the issue is being produced from things done wrong on both sides.
Abusive comment hidden. (Show it anyway.)
Login to comment.
Email This Post to a Friend
"Husband Sends Wife a Spreadsheet Detailing His Sex Deprivation"

Separate multiple emails with a comma. Limit 5.


Success! Your email has been sent!

close window

This website uses cookies.

This website uses cookies to improve user experience. By using this website you consent to all cookies in accordance with our Privacy Policy.

I agree
Learn More