Even the simple act of giving a gift can be selfish. Third Leg Studios presents a scenario in which every gift comes with a selfish intent from the giver. You think that there must be an end to the ways this can be done, but they go on and on, until everyone in the family implies their true intent.
This poor guy. He probably just wanted some candy for Christmas. And he probably put a lot of thought into the gifts he bought for everyone else. We aren't quite sure he's really related to the rest of them. Five days later, College Humor visited the same idea, except this time it's an office party, and only one guy bought all the gifts.
In this case, it's just Raphael who's figured out the way to manipulate Christmas to buy himself stuff and make himself look generous at the same time. Or so he thought. The recipients eventually call him out on it.
J.R.R. Tolkien had four children. In 1920, his three-year-old son John had some questions about Father Christmas. That's when Tolkien became Father Christmas, as he wrote the charming letter you see above to his son. He drew the picture, too.
For the next 23 years, every Christmas Eve, Tolkien wrote a letter to his four children from Father Christmas. What began as short, informative letters—“I am just now off to Oxford with a bundle of toys”—evolved into longer tales about life at the North Pole. The 1932 letter begins, “Dear Children, There is alot to tell you. First of all a Merry Christmas! But there have been lots of adventures you will want to hear about. It all began with the funny noises underground … ”
What follows is a tale of a beloved polar bear, mysterious caves filled with goblins, and their heroic counterparts, the Red Gnomes. As with The Hobbit, which Tolkien wrote and published in this period, the letters contain entire worlds, with invented languages and histories, alongside detailed illustrations.
According to Randall Munroe of xkcd, the true meaning of Christmas is to find the true meaning of Christmas. That reasoning is so meta that it folds in on itself. Whereas, the true meaning of Christmas is a festival to light up the darkness of winter, eat enough carbs and fats to keep us from freezing, and cement social relationships while we have the time because we can't grow crops and build things this time of year. Yes, you will have religious traditions tacked onto those celebrations, because why not? Jesus' birthday was not recorded (that wasn't a thing in His culture), but if you're going to celebrate a date, the winter festival is as good as any to commemorate the momentous occasion. And there's nothing wrong with that. Meanwhile, you'll find similar holidays in other religions for all the reasons we have a celebration around the winter solstice.
The new year is a time to start fresh, which is why we make resolutions to improve our lives. While our record for keeping those resolutions is pretty poor, there's nothing wrong with starting off with a new calendar and good intentions. Simon Tofield brings us some of the more common and useful New Year's resolutions illustrated by the cat.
You and I know full well that cats don't change. But sometimes they can inspire us to change by being a good example or a bad example. Simon's Cat is both.
Why? Why would you display a giant Santa Claus in a public square with no pants? It appears to be an homage of sorts to the iconic image of Marilyn Monroe in The Seven Year Itch without the charm. Look at his face- he's not enjoying the cool breeze! This inflatable Santa Claus stands outside a shopping mall in Taiyuan, China. Someone thought this was a good idea. You can imagine children climbing the fence to see what's under that skirt. It's just one of many Santa Claus statues that don't portray the idea of a benevolent old elf who brings gifts and spreads goodwill. See ten creepy and scary public displays of Santa Claus at Web Urbanist. -via Fark
You know how we makes jokes about certain types of food that run right through you? That goes for drinks, too, especially if you over imbibe. That can be a holiday hazard, since there are plenty of us who only drink alcohol on special occasions. Food artist and photographer Henry Hargreaves cut out the middleman, so to speak, with his latest food art series entitled Down the Toilet. These are classic cocktails, with recipes, served up where they'll end up eventually -in the porcelain throne. See a slideshow of them all at Hargreaves' website for larger, readable recipes or continue reading for a gallery of these drinks.
Joseph is one of those guys who will spend three days building a machine to do a one-hour job. And that's a job that only needs to be done once a year. One of his machines wraps Christmas gifts, and the other decorates a Christmas tree.
Oh, did I mention that the machines aren't good at all at what they do? Yes, they work, but the results leave a bit to be desired. Covering your tree in hairspray might seem like a great idea to keep your ornaments in place, but think about how sticky a mess you'll have trying to put the tree away. Or getting it out next year. Yuck! -via Boing Boing
The first time I saw It's a Wonderful Life, around 1986, I was alone at home and had never heard of the movie. It was depressing, long, and got more depressing as it went. I couldn't figure out where the story was going. But for some reason, I kept watching. This is not a wonderful life, I thought. George Bailey saw his dreams crushed, life was hard, and the one wealthy man in town was pure evil. And when the angel showed up, it got even worse. And poor Uncle Billy!
So evidently Uncle Billy isn’t allowed to just slightly gloat in this Wonderful Life universe – he can’t even walk away from a party without crashing into something and falling down – he’s a lovably disorganized, slightly kooky guy until he’s not so lovable – at least not to George Bailey anymore. So, every time I see Uncle Billy smile and fold that newspaper with the money inside and just hand it over to Mr. Potter I nearly scream. I scream thinking of myself, too. That moment of recognition in yourself – the nightmarish thought of committing some kind of easy blunder that results in consequences so dire, that you wish you’d never left the house that morning. Or that week, for that matter. The “what if?” spiral that leads to catastrophizing – a “what if?” that will become a grim alternate reality for George Bailey, when one wishes that, one not only never stepped out of the house, but never stepped outside for a week. In Bailey’s case, he wished he had never stepped into life.
An essay by Kim Morgan explains why I couldn't stop watching the movie all those years ago. Each of the residents of Bedford Falls are well-fleshed-out real people, with their hopes and dreams and quirks. They get kicked down a lot, but they're just doing the best they can. We can see ourselves in them. The theme for most of the film is that no good deed goes unpunished. No wonder the main character is on the verge of suicide. It's a Wonderful Life is an old fashioned horror film in that it instills a spirit of dread and despair in the viewer. Read how each character is shortchanged at Beverly Cinema. -via Metafilter
Matt Johnson's 2017 Christmas light show is a contradiction in terms. Who does Christmas lights with the theme of the dark side? And in a year we see the very first Star Wars movie with barely any trace of Darth Vader? But the show is impressive, set to an EDM version of The Imperial March.
The song is performed by Celldweller. You can visit this house at Dignowity Park in San Antonio, Texas. The light show runs nightly from 6-10 PM through January 1. -via Geeks Are Sexy
Once upon a time, you thought you were the only person who had to endure wearing a Christmas sweater that was too cheesy to be cool. It was even worse when that sweater was an actual Christmas gift, meaning you had to act grateful for it, but at least the next day you could put off wearing it for a year. Eventually we learned that was a shared experience, and the culture of the Ugly Christmas Sweater was born. But let's go back to the beginning, in the 1950s.
As America was settling into its post-war suburbia phase, the commercialization of Christmas manifested itself in new and exciting ways. One of these was the now-infamous Christmas sweater. While they’d been around in some form since the late 19th century, what were then known as ‘Jingle Bell Sweaters’ were practically a required uniform for fathers of the era as they gathered their family to go caroling, opened presents on Christmas morning, or partake in some similarly idyllic, Rockwellian fantasy.
While this particular incarnation would be considered subdued by many of today’s standards, perhaps the strangest part was there wasn’t a shred of irony in these early incarnations of holiday-themed apparel. Partly because they were seen as legitimately fun and festive attire that was almost a prerequisite for holiday merriment, and partly because irony had yet to be invented.*
National Geographic News came up with a cute idea for a year-end list. There were quite a few animal stories about creatures eating, including a couple that thought they could chew up an automobile. Most of the stories are in video form, and some are cute while others are a bit cringe-inducing. The puffin above stood still just long enough to get his photograph made before he gulped down a whole school of fish he'd caught all at once. See the rest of the stories at NatGeo.
(Image credit: Sunil Gopalan/National Geographic Your Shot)
Dami Lee did a comic about her experience of taking a pottery class. This is only the first portion. The rest of the comic follows her heartbreak at finding out that nothing is as easy as it seems at first. In turn, the comic is just a setup for the photographs of what she actually made and why they turned out the way they did. While there's nothing wrong with branching out, it's a good thing she's a talented webcomic artist. Read the full story at As Per Usual.
Tradition is great, but if your Christmas celebrations need to be spiced up, you can incorporate someone else's tradition into your holiday. If pork is your go-to Christmas dinner main dish, the Philippines do it up right. Looking for a twist on fruitcake? Try Australia's White Christmas. And for a beverage with a kick, Chile's cola de mono might fill the bill.
Eggnog and glogg will leave you toasty and numb, but if you really want to get soused, consider the Chilean holiday drink cola de mono (meaning monkey’s tail). Like a White Russian, it’s a creamy coffee cocktail that goes down smooth, but where the cola de mono messes you up is the use of aguardiente, the anise-flavored spirit that translates to “fire water” for a reason. This particular recipe we tested—holy shit!—was like an iced coffee with a knuckle sandwich chaser. (You can substitute brandy or pisco if you don’t have aguardiente.)
Every year, thousands of people participate in reddit's Secret Santa gift exchange. Although it is not a competition, the metaphoric brass ring goes to the person whose name is drawn by Bill Gates. The Microsoft founder and billionaire goes the extra mile to find out what the recipient would like and then sends multiple gifts. For 2017, that astonished recipient is VietteLLC. From her entry letter, and by checking her posting history and social media, Gates discovered her preferences, in particular that she dreams of opening a no-kill cat shelter. He made donations to three of her favorite shelters ($750 total), and send a giant Pusheen cat!
I could fit about 5 of me in the box I got. I did, in fact, stare awkwardly at the FedEx guy - I was so far beyond confused. Then I saw my Reddit username and apparently said “wwhaaatttt” in such a weird way, the delivery guy started laughing. I tried to pull it inside and I guess looked ridiculous, so the guy ran back up to help me lol
I figured it was some cat tower from Amazon prime - right? I mean - what else.. a gigantic cat? Let’s be serious. I instantaneously recognized the big grey blob shape and 2 tail stripes and, I kid you not, screamed like a little girl. I was over the moon, and immediately loved my mystery santa for all of eternity, for ever and ever. They CLEARLY knew my soul.
As Pusheen was being released from his box, I picked up a letter with a picture, and thought it was SUPER weird that someone was so obsessed with Bill Gates as to send me a photo of him. Then I just caught fragments of the letter all at once “a donation has been made” “bill gates”, and my cat’s names. It clicked and I started to burst out loud laughing and crying simultaneously. I was a cliché.
Did you know that koalas can stretch their necks upward to reach tasty leaves and pull in internet wifi? And that the European wasp survives mainly on coffee? Just make sure to avoid the pizza snake!
This retro-style documentary on Australian animals is admitttedly about as plausible as the real stories of these weird animals, but is not to be taken as the work of someone who actually knows what they're talking about. -via Laughing Squid
