Captchas are there so you can prove you are a person instead of a 'bot. But what if you fail the test? They can be pretty hard! Frank Lesser, who writes for The Colbert Report, expresses his frustration with captchas in a column in the New York Times that you might relate to. Link -via the Presurfer

The internet is a giant playground full of potholes you can fall in without realizing it. Lifehacker has advice that you've probably heard, but can never be reinforced enough. Read these tips on protecting your privacy, your money, your data, your reputation, and your blood pressure. My favorite: Do not feed the trolls.

First, it's important to remember that trolls are not attacking you—they're attacking boredom. They have nothing better to do than say something mean so that's how they've unfortunately chosen to spend their time. If what they're saying isn't going to have much of an impact on anyone, just remember that they're bored, loathsome people and let it go. On the other hand, if they're promoting hate speech and potentially causing harm to others, it's best to avoid engaging them and instead report them to the site's administrator. Many sites offer a means of flagging harmful posts, and commenting systems offer ways for an administrator to ban problematic users. A simple email is often sufficient to take care of a bad person. Engaging with a troll-ish thread is just going to make you angry and potentially get you in trouble, too. If you do fall into the trap of feeding a troll, however, using the principles of cognitive therapy can be a worthy solution. This means responding positively and calmly, while accepting their different opinion. The trolls will likely find it frustrating and even condescending, but it's hard to argue with someone who is accepting your point of view (or even agreeing with you).

Link -via Geeks Are Sexy

Aric S. Queen was on a quest to be the first person at the ancient Inca city of  Machu Picchu, Peru, on January first. However, that involves some high-altitude walking uphill first thing in the morning, and he despaired as other hikers passed him by. But at the gate, serendipity gave Queen the opportunity to go first.

Ten-plus years of travel, forty-plus countries, countless marvels, but this is the only place I cried at seeing.

One photo was snapped from my phone — those four seconds were the maximum amount of time I wanted to take my eyes off of it.

For 30 seconds, I sat in silence – not even realizing what I had just done.

It took the sound of footsteps behind me to bring everything back to the present. And it took the sounds of voices to realize that when I had first gotten up – there were none.

An estimated 1.2 million people this year, and I was visitor no. 0,000,000,001.

Read Queen's story and see a video of the adventure at Intelligent Travel magazine. Link -Thanks, Marilyn Terrell!

(Image credit: Aric S. Queen)

Sally is a 44-year-old Sumatran orangutan at the Denver Zoo. She developed a benign fibroid tumor of the uterus that was interfering with her other organs. Veterinarian Diana Boon arranged to collect orangutan blood from around the country and enlisted volunteer surgeons to remove the growth. The doctors tried to prepare but found a dearth of information on orangutan anatomy.

But when Sally lost the ability to go to the bathroom, Boon understood she had only days to live if the obstruction wasn't removed. So on a Friday afternoon she fired off e-mails to the team, telling them the surgery had to be done by Sunday. And they wouldn't have blood.

"It had to be a bloodless surgery," Boon said. "It was either this would work, or this wouldn't work and it would be fatal for Sally."

And then, the group got a break. Covidien, a Boulder company that makes a device called LigaSure that helps limit blood-loss during surgery, donated the use of a machine for Sally's sake.

Another snag loomed. The procedure demanded quite a bit of rummaging around in Sally's abdomen. If a wayward blade nicked her distended bowel, she would die; Sally would not understand how to use a colostomy bag.

There were other hairy moments during the six hours of surgery, but Sally came through it. Read the entire story (and see a video) at The Denver Post. Link -via Fark

(YouTube link)

A Sulcata tortoise enjoys a salad, which probably took hours in real time. With time-lapse fast forward photography and a dramatic soundtrack, he's an unstoppable eating machine. -via Geekosystem

Aliens may have been rating our planet as a travel destination all along! This set of reviews is from Matthieu Barrère's webcomic Awful Drawings. Link -Thanks, Kim!

(YouTube link)

The vehicle plays the music in the new video from OK Go in conjunction with Chevrolet. This took four months of preparation and four days of shooting. From their website:

So let’s not forget the true meaning of Sunday — OK Go in a super-hacked Chevy Sonic, playing 288 guitars, 55 pianos, and 1,157 homemade instruments while Damian acts as a stunt driver. (He took lessons.) It’s truly the little things that are meaningful.

Link -via reddit

AMC is promoting the return of the TV show Mad Men with a minimalist poster showing a falling man, with a blank expanse around him. The only other thing the poster contains is the date at the bottom right. That's just asking to be embellished, and plenty of folks have great ideas about what to add. Gothamist asked for submissions,  and has been collecting the "improvements" to post for your pleasure. Link to gallery one. Link to gallery two. -via Laughing Squid

The following is an article from Uncle John's Unstoppable Bathroom Reader. When people enter the federal government's Witness Protection Program, they're supposed to hide, right?

1. WISEGUY: Henry Hill, a member of New York's Lucchese crime family and participant in the $5.8 million Lufthansa heist from New York's Kennedy Airport in 1978, the largest cash theft in U.S. history.

IN THE PROGRAM: The Witness Protection program relocated him to Redmond, Washington, in 1980, and Hill, who's changed his name to Martin Lewis, was supposed to keep a low profile and stay out of trouble. He wasn't very good at either -in 1985 he and writer Nicholas Pileggi turned his mob exploits into the bestselling book Wiseguy, which became the hit move Goodfellas.

WHAT HAPPENED: When the book became a bestseller, "Martin Lewis" couldn't resist telling friends and neighbors who he really was. Even worse, he reverted to his life of crime. Since 1980 Hill has racked up a string of arrests for crimes ranging from drunk driving to burglary and assault. In 1987 he tried to sell a pound of cocaine to two undercover Drug Enforcement officers, which got him thrown out of the Witness Protection Program for good. "Henry couldn't go straight," says Deputy Marshal Bud McPherson. "He loved being a wiseguy. He didn't want to be anything else."

2. WISEGUY: Aladena "Jimmy the Weasel" Fratianno, mafia hit man and acting head of the Los Angeles mob. When he entered the Witness Protection program in 1977, Fratianno was the highest-ranking mobster ever to turn informer.

IN THE PROGRAM: Fratianno had another claim to fame: he is also the highest-paid witness in the history of the program. Between 1977 and 1987, he managed to get the feds to pay for his auto insurance, gas, telephone bills, real-estate taxes, monthly check to his mother-in-law, and his wife's facelift and breast implants.

WHAT HAPPENED: The Justice Department feared the payments made the program look "like a pension fund for aging mobsters," so he was thrown out of the program in 1987. But by that time, Fratianno had already soaked U.S. taxpayers for an estimated $951,326. "He was an expert at manipulating the system," McPherson said. Fratianno died in 1993.

3. WISEGUY: James Cardinali, a five-time murderer who testified against Gambino crime boss John Gotti at his 1987 murder trial. Gotti, nicknamed the "Teflon Don," beat the rap, but Cardinali still got to enter the Witness Protection Program after serving a reduced sentence for his own crimes. After his release, federal marshals gave him a new identity and relocated him to Oklahoma.

IN THE PROGRAM: Witnesses who get new identities aren't supposed to tell anyone who they really are, and when Cardinali slipped up and told his girlfriend in 1989, the program put him on a bus to Albuquerque, New Mexico, and told him to get lost.

Stravinsky and Nijinsky

The most infamous riot in the history of the performing arts began with the violins in Stravinsky’s “The Rite of Spring.” But more remarkable than the fistfight was the way the piece revolutionized classical music and ballet.

On the night of May 29, 1913, an elegant Parisian crowd assembled for the first performance of Igor Stravinsky’s eagerly anticipated new ballet, “The Rite of Spring.” The opening seemed promising, but then the violins kicked in with a pulsing chord so dissonant that it made spectators wince. As the orchestra continued, the audience hissed and booed. They rose to their feet and shouted—some defending the music, but most denouncing it. People began whacking each other with canes, umbrellas, and, before long, bare fists. Stravinsky’s musical revolution had arrived.

Prelude to “The Rite”

By one account, the idea for “The Rite of Spring” came to Stravinsky in a dream. He envisioned a pagan rebirth ritual, with people throwing themselves before vengeful gods. Rather than a cheerful celebration of springtime, it was a dark and superstitious rite. To compose music appropriate for such a vision, Stravinsky tossed aside convention and broke new ground in rhythm and harmony. He constructed atonal chords never heard before and developed a meter so complex that he struggled to accurately record it on paper. At times in the piece, parts of the orchestra actually seem to be playing against each other.

Stravinsky first performed “The Rite of Spring” for ballet director Sergei Diaghilev and orchestra conductor Pierre Monteux. Both men were shocked and overwhelmed. Later, Monteux wrote that he didn’t understand one note of it and wanted to flee the room. Nevertheless, plans for the ballet got under way. Diaghilev entrusted the choreography to dance phenom Vaslav Nijinsky, whose steps proved just as inspired as the music.


Concept, costumes, and set designs by Nicholas Roerich.

The first signs of trouble came during rehearsals. The ballerinas complained that Nijinsky’s flat-footed, straight-knee jumps jarred them to their bones, and the musicians struggled to keep up with Stravinsky’s galloping pace. At one point, after practicing a particularly dissonant section, the orchestra couldn’t help but burst into nervous laughter.

You've seen many minimalist art posters based on movies, but how about minimalist posters for internet memes? Artist Stefan Van Zoggel created 29 of them so far, illustrating both classic and recent memes. Link -via Blame It On The Voices

Jen Yates has a roundup of cake wrecks celebrating the Super Bowl. Can you decipher the message on these cupcakes?

HINT: It's starts with the word "gone."

Both teams are represented equally in the collection at Cake Wrecks. Link

This is what happens when the person who actually saw something is not the same person who has the art supplies to illustrate it. They probably never even met, so what you end up with is somewhat akin to the Telephone Game. There are more examples at Buzzfeed. Some drawings may be technically NSFW. Link

(vimeo link)

Once, a short film like this would have been called "experimental." Now it's an art form. Shinji Inamoto presents wildly transforming objects for the sake of enjoying the transformations. -via Laughing Squid

No matter how much you think you know, science is always coming up with new findings. Think you are safe from STDs? Think again:

Studies show over 80% of all sexually active adults will contract an STD at some point, although most won't notice. That's because 80% of all people who contract one of the 25 varieties of STDs don't show any symptoms and most don't even realize they have one. In fact, the American Social Health Association estimates that 80% of sexually active people contract the Human Papillomavirus (HPV) at one point in their life. While those statistics were taken before the HPV vaccine was released, the vaccine only prevents two of the most dangerous strains of the disease, meaning even those vaccinated can still catch one of the many other strains.

While the numbers sound scary, the upside is that most people who contract an STD won't suffer any negative effects as a result.

That's just one of a list of ten thing you probably didn't know that you can learn about at Oddee. Be prepared that this list contains adults-only subject matter, but the images are SFW. Link