~Illustration by:Â Matt Lassen~
At a cemetery, looking for my name on tombstones. This is the Goth version of Googling yourself. @toddlevinTeam Twaggies's Blog Posts
What does your twitter avatar say about you? @lanceulanoff
Illustrated by Lance Ulanoff. For the original post, see Lance Ulanoff's Techoti tumblr.
The J on the neighbors' light-up JOY decoration just burnt out. A multifaith family, perhaps? @emilybrianna
No mystery why men love golf when the objective is to get the balls near the hole with minimal effort. -Â @sweetDEVILbitch
~Illustration by:Â Matt Lassen~
I tried oscillating once. Not a fan. - @rodney_at_large~Illustration by:Â Gideon Virgadamo~
Cats probably wouldn't need 9 lives if they wore tiny little helmets and didn't smoke cigarettes. @robdelaney
Cats probably wouldn't need 9 lives if they wore tiny little helmets and didn't smoke cigarettes. @robdelaney
I'm not looking for my knight in shining armour, just a man who knows how to handle a sword. @LittleHarmonica
~Illustration by:Â Matt Lassen~
I just put a potato in the microwave and pressed Popcorn but it's still a potato... Did I do it wrong? @perlanation"Manuscript" is probably the classiest place to hide the word "anus." @robdelaney
~Illustration by:Â Kevin Coffee~
Setting off the fire alarm while attempting to make peanut butter and jelly requires a special type of talent. - @anniecolbert  ~Illustration by: Matt Lassen~
Is it possible that zombies are just regular people that had decaf by accident? @JayTheOkay  ~Illustration by: Matt Lassen~
I masturbated so much yesterday that generations of sperm to come will talk about what they were doing on the holocaust of September 20.  @bdbdleeroybrown
Women are like Wi-Fi. They're everywhere and no one will tell me the password -Â @savvystrider
~Illustration by:Â Carnilius R~
Time flies. Those pesky little pests that follow you back and forth in your time machine. @jscottwilson
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