"Hilly zoo, Barry flea!"

It ain't so much running into whales as deafening them that's the problem.

When I started giving blood thirty-odd years ago, the Blood Transfusion Service (as it was then) used to offer tea, coffee, squash and - yes - Guiness! It was only in tiny stubby little cans - 250ml, I guess. I often wondered whether they had them specially made.

My father in law did quality control at the Guiness Brewery in Park Royal. The queue for job applications went round the block.

I thought everyone knew this? Try walking with your arms to your sides and you'll soon tire. Anyway, anyone with a mechanical bent can tell that it's more efficient just by watching it.

GIGO.

And now, a giant sculpture of Ronnie Reagan made entirely from slug slime.

Why?

"Because I can" isn't really for adults.

75%,but I've no idea who Sam Wilson is - Uncle Sam doesn't figure highly this side of the pond - nor does Laugh In.

I bet the world fell out of his bottom.

And my cats?

He couldn't bite.

It is, of course, axiomatic that any post criticising spelling or grammar should contain at least once such error.

See.

Rifling and good ammo selection would probably make the best improvements, provided you've practised sufficiently.

Would a dog be any less happy in a freakshow? I don't begrudge the woman her money, but the reasoning seems a little unsound. It'd probably get lots of attention and as a valuable item would get well looked after, too.

Near us is The Phoenix School - one road sign for which reads Pheonix. The local paper misprinted it in 1" headlines the other day, too.
Another local school has a sign "Pupils Entrance". Now, I'm glad they find children interesting, but entrancing sounds a little creepy. Besides, you'd thing a school could get apostrophes right.

I'm sure there are bits of me that glow when things get heated.