no. 451 - @stevenamiri













~Illustration by:Â Kevin Coffee~
"Pew! Pew!" - priests pointing out seating in church. -Â @vonbunnie
~Illustrated by: Cecile Dyer~
If someone says "Don't even talk to me before I get my coffee" I won't want to talk to them after they have their coffee - @kellyoxford
 ~Illustration by: Pete Hillstrom~
She blinded me with science. Fine, it was mace, but she sprayed it very scientifically. -Â @IGotsSmarts


~Illustration by:Â Pete Hillstrom~
I'm 0 for my lifetime when it comes to finding the silverware drawer in someone elses kitchen on the first try. @SavageEmperor
Classical Music Fact: Rachmaninov had 16 fingers on each hand. -Â @thesulk
I just want people to accept me for who I pretend to be. -Â @yoyoha
 ~Illustration by: Carnilius R~
I'm always amazed when I see an owl without a lollipop. -Â @Coastiefish
~Illustration by:Â Jeff Naslund~
The only member of my family with a personal trainer is the dog. -Â @funnyoneliners
~Illustration by:Â Kevin Coffee~