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Here’s All 290 Star Wars Movies Officially in Production Right Now

Disney is doing their best to milk the Star Wars franchise for all it can. We are looking forward to Solo: A Star Wars Story, Star Wars: Episode IX, the Kenobi film, a new trilogy of films by Ryan Johnson, another trilogy by David Benioff and D.B. Weiss, and a slew of TV series for Disney's streaming service. The Hard Times took this nonsense and ran with it, plotting a new Star Wars film for every year through 2361. They include documentaries, musicals, pornography (Porgasm! 2284) and origin stories for every character in the galaxy. Here's a sample.

228. Uncle Owen’s Revenge (2299)
229. Honey, I blew up the Death Star (2300)
230. Kylo Leonard Part 6 (2301)
231. Gone with the Mace Windu (2302)
232. Untitled Movie Set in Jedi Ghost Planet Starring a Yoda Puppet (2303)

At this rate, we shouldn't be surprised that Jar Jar's dad gets his own film (2022). I might skip that, but I am intrigued by Viva Los Vader (2038). I think Moisture Farmers’ Almanac (2032) might be a snooze. You can see them in classic Star Wars opening crawl form or read them at The Hard Times.  -via Metafilter


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