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How to Win at Monopoly and Lose All Your Friends

Someone who goes by the name of elpher explained that he doesn’t like Monopoly. Yet he always wins. The point of winning is to prove to his friends that Monopoly is not fun, and they should play something else. Then he gives us his exact strategy so you, too, can win the game. First off, read and understand the rules, because no one else does. He lays out the best monopolies for you to collect. Never upgrade your houses to hotels, because you want to create a housing shortage. He is ruthless.   

At this point, you more or less have the game sewn up. If losing a normal game of monopoly is frustrating, losing to this strategy is excruciating, as a losing opponent essentially has no path to victory, even with lucky rolls. Your goal is to play conservatively, lock up more resources, and let the other players lose by attrition. If you want to see these people again, I recommend not gloating, but simply state that you're playing to win, and that it wasn't your idea to play Monopoly in the first place.

My normal strategy is to avoid the game in the first place, but if you want to learn to win, make sure you load all the images at imgur. -via the A.V. Club


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