This is the opening paragraph, where I tell you about a scientific study in as few words as possible to get you interested. I also need to gather up and condense any information that isn't contained in an easily-copied quote.
If the quoted paragraphs are from different parts of the article, I will put a sentence here to separate them.
Down here I might try to answer the obvious question from someone who isn't going to go read the linked article, then I suggest you go to the link and read the rest. Clicking this link will take you to the original article -via reddit
This paragraph elaborates on the claim, adding weasel-words like "the scientists say" to shift responsibility for establishing the likely truth or accuracy of the research findings on to absolutely anybody else but me, the journalist.
If the quoted paragraphs are from different parts of the article, I will put a sentence here to separate them.
In this paragraph I will reference or quote some minor celebrity, historical figure, eccentric, or a group of sufferers; because my editors are ideologically committed to the idea that all news stories need a "human interest", and I'm not convinced that the scientists are interesting enough.
Down here I might try to answer the obvious question from someone who isn't going to go read the linked article, then I suggest you go to the link and read the rest. Clicking this link will take you to the original article -via reddit
Comments (20)
I will probably point out various flaws in the methodology of the various studies cited by the research article.
I will comment on all the comments made so far, no matter how irrelevant, disagreeing with the bulk of them, but being sure to mention that one or two of the previous commenter have made good points n order to let everyone know that I am not just arguing for the sake of arguing (which I am).
Perhaps I will even somehow manage to link the research article to an irrelevant yet controversial topic such as the banning of the burqua in order to incite more arguing. I will then save this page to my favourites and revisit it frequently, viciously defending my arguments to anyone who dares question my logic.
I do not know the meaning of conciseness. My comment is multiple paragraphs long and as a result most people will never read it.
Due to your overzealous grammar expectations, I shall invoke Godwin's Law and state your efforts to be those of the Nazis.
On the other hand, years ago, I was with a large party (18 of us) that each had their own expense reports, so we had to have the check divided amongst us. I thought the waitress was rude and not very competent, thus I subtracted the already-included tip--thus giving her nothing.
Before anyone attacks me, know this: my expectations are fairly low on what constitutes the achievement of a 20% tip: get the orders right (or make them right) and stop by during the meal (at least once) to check on things. I know being a waiter/waitress is a hard job and tips are usually shared.
What is "massively over-tipping?" Tipping 30% on a $20 meal costs an extra two dollars over a 20% tip.
I tip 20% after tax in general, maybe add a few bucks (upping it to 30-35%) if the server is really pleasant and attentive. If the server is a rude idiot that takes 30 minutes to bring out water, let alone take our order, I'll tip a dollar regardless of the bill. Then on the way out say, "Hey, sorry you're having a bad day, I hope it gets better."
As I said, working in the service industry sucks. No reason to beat them down for having an off day.
Oh, and of course I don't tip where the tip is already figured into the bill.
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If you're saying this as a waitress (I'm guessing no), then you obviously have not learned the 'trick' of giving your customers exceptional service to get exceptional tips. Though I'm sure I could be wrong, I have a feeling that the greater percentage of truly good waiters/waitresses would HATE to have their tips taken away from them.
If you're saying this as a paying customer (I'm guessing yes), you will be truly HORRIFIED at the DRASTICALLY increased prices you will be paying across the board, if restaurants/bars/pubs would ever go to hourly based pay of its staff, rather than the current tip-based system.
Yes, tipping can be a hassle, but it tends to guarantee (in theory, anyway) the lowest possible prices for food (and drinks) ordered off a menu.