Why make one? As President Kennedy said of a somewhat similar ambition, we Americans do great things like this “not because they are easy, but because they are hard.” Nick of Dude Foods — the man behind the chocolate covered deep fried triple double Oreos — added nineteen cheeses to a Domino’s Wisconsin 6-Cheese Pizza. View his list of cheeses and more photos at the link.

Link -via That’s Nerdalicious!

Frosty the Cheeseball Man is just like your everyday snowman, they melt away, except they are far, far more delicious. This terrifying treat was made by the same genius who invented the churpumple pie/cake crossover.

Link Via Geekosystem

I’m not really one for Halloween — or at least making decorations like this for a Halloween party. I mean, everyone would expect this sort of thing. To use Martha’s skull cheese platter to full effect, it should be brought out when no one expects it, such as at Easter or Grandma’s birthday party.

Link -via That’s Nerdalicious!

I would've guessed candy or liquor, but no. The most frequently stolen food on Earth is actually cheese:

Almost four percent of the world's cheese supply ends up stolen, putting cheese ahead of other frequent grocery targets like candy and alcohol. Shoplifting rates as a whole are going up, because, hey, times are tough. "For the past six months, [retailers] have been affected by bad news—economic slow down, government cuts and now an increase in shoplifting," one retail analyst told Sky News.

Link | The findings at Centre for Retail Research

Macaroni & Cheese Air Freshener – $2.95

Does your daily commute have you on edge? You need the Macaroni & Cheese Air Freshener from the NeatoShop. Nothing calms road rage like the smell of comfort food. Macaroni & Cheese! Yum!

Be sure to check out the NeatoShop hilarious Air Fresheners.

Link

But what exactly is American cheese? I suppose it’s that exact question that gives it such a bad rap. The American cheese that you find on supermarket shelves isn’t cheese made in the traditional way (milk that’s formed into curds and pressed). Instead, it’s either a blend of cheese and additives, or it’s a highly processed mixture of ingredients such as water, milk, milkfat, milk protein, whey, food coloring, flavorings, and emulsifiers.  I wanted to get as close as possible to the taste and texture of American cheese using only pantry ingredients and a food processor.

By making your own American cheese, not only will you know exactly what went into it, but also you can add in flavorings such as black pepper, roasted red peppers… you name it. As I concocted my version of American cheese in the test kitchen, not only did I draw a crowd of curious onlookers, I caused all of the snooty foodies to run for the hills. That’s okay, because I’d take any kind of American cheese over head cheese any day.

The process of making your own doesn’t look too difficult, with directions from Yvonne Ruperti at America’s Test Kitchen. Link -via the Presurfer

Macaroni & Cheese Bandages – $4.95

How do you make comfort food even more comforting? You turn it into a bandage!

Check out the Macaroni & Cheese Bandage from the NeatoShop.  These Mac & Cheese printed bandages will have you feeling happy and loved in no time.

Be sure to check out the NeatoShop for more  unusual Bandages!

Link

The German ad agency Kolle Rebbe designed chunks of Parmesan cheese shaped like pencils. Flakes are shaved off with a manual pencil sharpener:

The cheeses are shaped like oversized pencils, where the “leads” contain three different flavors: truffles, pesto and chilli. With the sharpener included, the required amount of cheese can be sprinkled on the dish. A scale on the pencils and on the back of the packaging doesn’t just simply list how much of the Cheese Pencil is needed for each dish, but even how many calories the portion contains.

Link -via OhGizmo! | Photos: Ulrike Kirmse

Image credit: Flickr user francesca!!

Got milk? Well, you wouldn’t if it weren’t for these world-churning events.

MILK

You can’t spell “milk production” without g-o-a-t-s. Well, technically you could, ..but not historically. Goats were most likely the first dairy animals ever domesticated. Archeological evidence suggests that ancient peoples in what is now Iran and Iraq were selectively breeding these four-legged eating machines as far back as 8,000-9,000 B.C.E. And, while they may not look like much to us modern Americans, the logic behind goat keeping is impeccable. Small, sturdy, and able to eat just about anything you put in front of them, they’re easier creatures to keep healthy, happy, and milk-producing (particularly in cool, mountainous climates) than their larger relatives like cows and sheep. Several breeds have hair that can be shorn and used for clothing. And, like all milk animals, they’re an excellence nutritional value for what you have to put in.

Ruminants, the class of animals from which humans get all their dairy products, have a gigantic four-chambered stomach that allows them to happily digest dry stalks, fibrous vines, and leaves that other animals (humans included) write off as inedible. Their secret: lots and lots of chewing, in addition to partial digestion and regurgitation, then more chewing, followed by a healthy dose of specialized tummy bacteria. Unlike, say, pigs, which eat basically the same food as people and are only useful as meat, ruminants don’t compete with their owners for sustenance. Further, the milk they produce over several years provides far more nutrition than the meat a single animal could ever hope to put out. In fact, it only takes a couple of goats to keep a whole family of people fed for a year.

The extinct auroch.

As the concept of domesticating and milking animals spread from the Middle East, farmers adopted local beasts as their milk-giving ruminant of choice. Depending on things like climate, geography, and population, various regions favored yaks, buffalo, cows, and sheep. All have their own special adaptations that make them better for certain environments and needs. Cows, for instance, were domesticated from long-horned wild aurochs around the same time and place as goats. Since at least 3,000 B.C.E. they’ve been bred primarily for their milk, which is richer than goats’ and due to their size, more abundant. However, as heavy eaters with a grass diet, cows really work best in temperate climates. Modern European cows are much smaller than their auroch ancestors, primarily because in captivity, the winter food supply was far less abundant. There is one notable exception to the ruminant rule, however: the camel. The only milkable domesticated animal that isn’t a ruminant, camels were particularly adapted to arid, desert regions, and as such, their milk has been a staple food in parts of Africa since 2500 B.C.E.

Image credit: Flickr user Jerrold Bennett

Amazingly, China is one of the very few Old World societies that didn’t develop some sort of reliance on milk. Most likely, this had more to do with the local flora than a dislike for dairy. Much of the natural vegetation in China, particularly during the ruminants’ rise, consisted of poisonous plants like wormwood and epazote, making it unsuitable for grazing. However, when nomads, and later Mongolians, came bearing milk, the Chinese were quick to take up the beverage. By 1300 B.C.E. they were using milk to dilute their tea.

BUTTER

Almost as soon as humans began relying on milk for sustenance, they were faced with another problem: How to make it last. Milk, as you’re probably aware, goes sour pretty quickly. And keeping those important nutrients in an edible condition for a longer period of time would have been a key concern. However, it is likely that the first solution to this problem came about by accident.

Image credit: Flickr user Klearchos Kapoutsis

Early in the history of domestication, travelers, shepherd, and farmers started carrying around drinks in bottles made from sheep or goat skin. Besides water and alcoholic beverages, the other drink that would have been toted around in this way was milk. Left to sit in these containers, cream would have likely separated out on top. Combine this with a day or more of being shaken around in a hip flask and it’s easy to see how one of those workers might have opened his milk jug and inadvertently discovered butter. By 2000 B.C.E. this haphazard churning process had become more standardized. In Arabia and Syria, women poured milk into larger jugs made from the whole leg and thigh of a goat. Then they suspended this jug from beams in the family tent and swung it around until butter formed.

Although it had the same nutrients as milk, butter could sit around longer and still be usable. It quickly became both nutritionally and symbolically important, figuring into countless mythologies as a signifier of abundance and creation. In some areas like Tibet, fermented dairy products like butter tea (along with butter itself) are still a staple of the diet.

YOGURT

Like butter, yogurt is also likely an accidental food. Let’ go back to those original shepherds and farmers, carrying milk around in skin pouches. If they were to skim off the cream or, alternately, remove the lump of butter the cream had formed, they’d be left with “skimmed” milk. Without refrigeration and under the blazing Middle Eastern sun, it wouldn’t have taken long for this milk to turn acidic, ferment, and curdle. The result: yogurt.

Another great way to preserve the nutrients from milk, yogurt could then be sun-dried or stored fresh under a layer of oil. And, long before the health food craze hit the U.S., yogurt fans were already extolling its medicinal properties. A medical text dating to 633 C.E. dubbed yogurt therapeutic. In fact, yogurt was introduced to Europe by a Turkish doctor as a medical treatment, and it saved the life of French king Francis I (curing him of his stomach troubles) in the 16th century.

CHEESE

Image credit: Flickr user DJ Mitchell

Once you have yogurt, it’s easy to get cheese. All you have to do is drain the watery natural yogurt, separating solid curd from liquid whey. Then it’s just a matter of salting the curd. Although the method has been refined and increased in complexity since, this is basically how the earliest cheese was made.

By 2000 B.C.E. cheese had become a luxury item in Egypt, with the recipes heavily guarded by priests and manufacturing scenes appearing in murals decorating kingly burials. It’s no wonder the product only became more beloved from there. For the ancient Greeks, cheese was the food of athletes. Romans, picking up on Greek tradition, gave each of their soldiers a daily 1-ounce cheese ration. And in Europe, cheese-making branched into a thousand local specialties that incorporated regional products and production secrets. For instance, real mozzarella, i.e. mozzarella di bufala, is made in the Capagna region south of Rome from the milk supplied by the 100,000 descendants of a herd of buffalo brought to Italy in 700 C.E.

________________________

The article above was reprinted with permission from mental_floss‘ book In the Beginning.

From Big Hair to the Big Bang, here’s a Mouthwatering Guide to the Origins of Everything by our friends at mental_floss.

Did you know that paper clips started out as Nazi-fighting warriors? Or that cruise control was invented by a blind genius? Read it all in the book!

For the next three days, 26 experts will examine, sniff and taste more than 30,000 pounds of cheese and butter. The best cheeses in 73 different classes will be awarded gold medals.

Sarah “The Cheese Lady” is also there.  This amazing cheese artist is in the process of sculpting a salute to the Green Bay Packers.

If you are going to be in Wisconsin you are in luck. This event is free and open to the public.

Link

It’s a simple quiz game. It gives you a word, and you decide whether it’s a cheese or  font. How hard could this be? After all, I buy cheese at the grocery store and I have many fonts on my computer. Surprise! There are way more of both in the world than I realized. Link -Thanks, Ginny Turner!

Here at Neatorama, we love the work of food artist Prudence Staite. We’ve featured her Snow White made out of apples, her Robert Pattinson made out of chocolate, and her Pope made out of pizza dough. One of her latest creations is a billboard made out of cheese. She and 13 assistants took 8 days to make this advertisement out of 10 types of British cheese.

Link | Photo: Jeff Moore

From the “Dustbin of History” files, here’s the pungent tale of two midwest states whose pride and honor were once challenged…by a slab of stinky cheese.

IT AIN’T EASY BEING CHEESY

It began in the winter of 1935 when a doctor in Independence, Iowa, prescribed an odd medicine to an ailing farm wife: Limburger cheese. The doctor figured the heavily aromatic cheese would help clear the woman’s clogged sinuses. (If you don’t know what Limburger smells like, give it a whiff the next time you’re at the supermarket.) So the order was put through to Monroe, Wisconsin, to send some Limburger cheese-post haste.

Why Monroe? Swiss cheesemakers first arrived there in 1845. At the time, Wisconsin was in the depths of an economic depression and cheese helped pull them out of it.By 1910, Wisconsin had become the cheese-making capital of the United States, producing more cheese than any other state. And Monroe was the Limburger capital of Wisconsin.

THE BATTLE LINES ARE DRAWN

Monroe’s postmaster, John Burkhard, approved the delivery and sent it on its way. But the mail carrier in Independence, Iowa, who delivered the Limburger was so offended by the stench wafting through his roadster that he refused to deliver it. Citing a postal rule that said mail would only be delivered if it “did not smell objectionable,” Independence’s postmaster, Warren Miller, concurred without examining or even smelling the cheese. He had it sent back to Monroe on the grounds that it could “fell an ox twenty paces.”

Burkhard took it personally; to insult Limburger is to insult not just Monroe, but all of Wisconsin and its proud cheese heritage. So Burkhard rewrapped the package and sent it back to Iowa. Miller promptly returned it to Wisconsin. War was brewing.

THE BATTLE OF DUBUQUE

Burkhard took his gripe all the way to the United States Postmaster General in Washington, D.C. At first, he couldn’t understand what all the fuss was about. So Burkhard sent him some Limburger.  The Postmaster general then decided that, yes, the cheese smelled bad, but no, it wasn’t hazardous. And the war was over, right? Wrong.

By this time the press had sniffed out the story. At a time when the nation was mired in the Great Depression and Hitler was rising to power in Germany, a story about smelly cheese was a breath of fresh air. And unwilling to give in, postmaster Burkhard challenged postmaster Miller to a “cheese-smelling duel”-if Miller could sit at a table and not wretch from the stench of freshly-cut Limburger, then he would never again raise a stink about Wisconsin and its cheese. Miller accepted. Dozens of people from each town-as well as a throng of reporters-showed up at the Julien Hotel in Dubuque, Iowa, on the cold afternoon of March 8, 1935, to witness the standoff.

A Duel to the Breath

The two sat across from each other at a table. While flashbulbs flickered and onlookers whispered, Burkhard placed a box on the table, unwrapped it, and produced a very strong sample of his state’s pride and joy, praising not only its medicinal qualities, but boasting that nothing on Earth tasted better with beer. The tension was so thick that you could cut it with a knife. Famed Milwaukee Journal reporter Richard S. Davis sent out a dispatch, calling it a “duel to the breath.”

As Burkhard prepared to push the slab of cheese over to Miller, he offered Miller a clothespin and a gas mask. But Miller just shook his head and meekly surrendered. “I won’t need that clothespin,” he lamented, “I haven’t any sense of smell.”

The crowd gasped. The battle was over before it began. Burkhard was immediately declared the winner, and Miller had to agree to allow any and all Wisconsin cheese safe passage through Iowa’s postal routes. The next day newspapers in 30 states ran a picture of the olfactorily-challenged Miller looking bewildered next to a piece of steaming Limburger. And now the war was over, right? Wrong. The final battle was yet to come.

THE BATTLE OF BEAVER DAM

While Burkhard was basking in victory, something he’d said about Limburger at that table in Dubuque-that nothing tasted better with beer-was churning through Miller’s head. Every good Iowan knew that the best food to eat with beer was smoked whitefish, not some stinky piece of cheese. Miller just couldn’t let it go. So he challenged Burkhard with another contest: a fight for the title of “Best Snack in the World.” Once again the press got whiff of the food feud, and they convened at the neutral site chosen for the contest: the American Legion Hall in Beaver Dam, Wisconsin.

This confrontation was even more serious than the first-now there were judges. And with so much at stake, both sides used underhanded tactics; they bribed the judges with beer. The fish-heads bought a round, then the cheese-heads. And once all palates were properly whetted, the showdown began.

Carnage

First came the sliced Limburger with beer. Then the Iowans gave the judges smoked whitefish…and more beer. The battle raged on: Limburger and beer, whitefish and beer. Limburger and beer, whitefish and beer. Finally, when the judges could eat or drink no more, they sent the least-inebriated member of their panel to the podium: “The judgeth have reached a dethision. It was unamus… unans… they all said the same darn thing! Cheese’n beer s’wunnerful. Fishes’n beer s’wunnerful, too. But when you have Limburger cheese and smoked whitefish and beer, heck, it don’t get no better than that!”

Both sides were declared victorious, Burkhard and Miller retained their respective states’ honor, and Limburger cheese had risen from  being referred to as “hazardous material” to holding the co-title of “Best Snack in the World.”

VICTORY PARADE

That October, Monroe, Wisconsin, held its annual Cheese Day parade. All the press coverage from the Limburger cheese war made it the biggest Cheese Day ever. Fifty thousand people showed up to bask in the glory-including the farmer’s wife (who had healed quite nicely). Warren Miller came all the way from Iowa and was given a place of honor in the parade-right next to his friend John Burkhard.

_____________________________

The article above is reprinted with permission from Uncle John’s Slightly Irregular Bathroom Reader, a fantastic book by the Bathroom Readers’ Institute.

The 17th book in this the Bathroom Reader series is filled to the brim with facts, fun, and fascination, including articles about the Origin of Kung Fu, How to Kill a Zombie, Women in Space and more!

Since 1988, the Bathroom Reader Institute had published a series of popular books containing irresistible bits of trivia and obscure yet fascinating facts.

If you like Neatorama, you’ll love the Bathroom Reader Institute’s books – go ahead and check ‘em out!

[...] is dressed with 100-year-old balsamic vinegar and the sourdough bread – which costs £5 alone – is sprinkled with powdered E175.[...]

Blunos worked with expert cheese-makers at local west country producer Pilgrim’s Choice to create the special white truffle blend, which gives the sandwich its hefty price tag.

He said: “We Brits are known to love our cheese sandwiches, and here’s one that not only comes with a royal price tag but is fit for the banqueting table.

‘The white truffle fuses beautifully with the West Country Farmhouse Cheddar and the edible gold leaf gives it a really special look.’

Link via Geekosystem | Photo: SWNS

If you thought KFC’s Double Down was bad, just wait until you get your hands on the new Fried Cheese Melt from Denny’s. The heart-stopping monstrosity combines 4 fried mozzarella sticks and a grilled cheese sandwich. At only $4 with a  an included side of fries, it’s a lot more filling for the price tag than the Double Down. I have to admit, while I found the Double Down to be seriously nasty looking, I am a sucker for cheese, so this actually looks pretty good to me.

Would you eat it?

Link Via Consumerist

For years, people have complained about the way that Subway places the cheese wedges on their sandwiches. This is best explained by a 2007 comic from Left Handed Toons. As we suspected, it was a policy designed to encourage customers to order extra cheese. However, what looks to be an internal memo from Subway Down Under hints that this policy might be changed effective July first. Link

Now, onto what you’ll learn about the 700 year old Appenzeller cheese, renowned as the “spiciest cheese from Switzerland:”

The dairy guys get to work at about 4 AM to receive and test the milk brought in by local farmers. They test it to ensure that the cows ate nothing but hay and meadow grass. If farmers bring in bad milk once, they get a warning; twice and they are banned.

To create a consistent product, part of the milk is skimmed, then slowly re-added to the whole milk to ensure an exact fat content. This is a practice older than most cheese dairies.

That’s only the very beginning of the process. If you are ever in Switzerland, you can take a tour of the cheese plant yourself! Link

School administrators have found an effective way to crack down on students who engage in food fights: Let them eat cheese. And nothing else.

Students at Atlantic City High School were served plain cheese sandwiches for two days this week as punishment for a cellphone-coordinated food fight that broke out recently.

One parent likened the American cheese between two dry slices of plain white bread to "a prison meal."

Link (Photo: Shutterstock)

Why serve a cheese ball when you can serve Steve Jobs’ head on a platter? Ken carved this from mozzarella cheese for his iPad launch party! See the process in pictures at The Cook’s Den, with recipes for the other foods served with the Apple “head cheese” (strangely, I see no apples, but you’ll find iPad Thai). Link

(Vimeo Link)

The Nolan family’s Laurel Valley Creamery got it’s start in 2005 when they purchased farmland belonging to Nick’s grandparents in an attempt to carry on their family farming tradition. Their goal now is to create a successful cheese business and also help people renew their relationship with food production. Nick and Celeste firmly believe that by turning grass into cheese there are rewards far greater than just filling stomachs.

The documentarians are hoping to raise money to finish the film and have it screened for next year’s awards. As the Thomas Jefferson quote rightly states: “Cultivators of the earth are the most valuable citizens.” Aside from Farmville, interest in farming in the United States seems to be going the way of the drive-in movie. This kind of project brings hope for future farmers.

Celeste Nolan’s Twitter.

Like its name says, This is Why You’re Fat website is dedicated to chronicling the brave culinary concoctions guaranteed to give you a coronary by day’s end. I think I’ve gained a few pounds just looking at the photos, and therefore can’t wait to show my latest find: the Bacon Cheese Turtleburgers!

Details at Interwebs Randomness and Other Inspiring Tales – via This is Why You’re Fat

The waitress was fired last March after she sold a hamburger to a co-worker who then asked for cheese, which she added.

The fast-food chain argued this turned the hamburger into a cheeseburger, and so she should have charged more.

The fired employee sued, and won:

The fast-food chain had argued that the waitress – who was employed at a branch in the northern town of Lemmer – had broken staff rules prohibiting free gifts to family, friends or colleagues.

But the court said in its written judgement: "The dismissal was too severe a measure. It is just a slice of cheese," reports AFP news agency.

Link

Wisconsin Assembly Bill 556 aims to honor bacterium Lactococcus (the little guy that helps make milk become cheese) as the state microbe.

If the measure passes, be sure to keep an eye on the Neatorama store, because I’m sure it won’t be long until Giant Microbes releases the first ever state microbe, Lactococcus. The cute guy to the left is in fact not him, but his distant cousin, mad cow disease.

Link

The cute little mouse in this commercial unfortunately gets caught in a mouse trap, since he can’t resist the tasty piece of cheddar laying there. The good thing is that it’s the kind of cheese that comes with a slogan that says “Seriously Strong”.

Link [YouTube]

A farm in Bjurholm, Sweden actually makes moose cheese. The lactation period of moose is short, lasting from about June to August, and the farm, owned by Christer and Ulla Johansson, keeps three moose that produce only 300 kilograms of cheese per year. The moose cheese sells for roughly US$1000 per kilogram.

Before you faint over the price, remember that a kilogram is more than two pounds! Link -via Unique Daily

Sarah Kaufmann carves sculptures out of blocks of cheese. A native of Wisconsin who studied art and worked in the dairy industry, she was born for this work. The picture above is of Kaufmann and her sculpture of Neil Armstrong. Click the link for a video of the artist in action.

Link

Official Website

Seriously, my arteries would need a Rooter Router if I let myself eat ever one of these that I thought were yummy (cough. ALL.). I’ve actually had the Mac ‘n’ Chese Sampler from S’MAC. Sooooo good. Next on list, the baked apple mac and cheese. 

Got the blue-box blues? We thought so. That’s why we dug up the most tempting and creative recipe twists on everybody’s favorite comfort food: macaroni and cheese. Whether you like yours meaty, gourmet or even in bite-size servings, you’re sure to find something here that inspires you to think, well, outside of the box.

Link

From the Upcoming ueue, submitted by ahammel.

There’s a line in one of the Robocop movies, "Don’t forget what you already know," or something like that. I may be remembering that wrong BUT check out these very useful kitchen tips from the pages of history, as compiled by Tipnut. For example:

To keep cheese from getting hard, cut off enough for immediate use and spread the remaining portion with a thin film of butter or margarine. Put it in a cool place. This keeps out the air and prevents the cheese from drying out.

Sprinkle pantry shelves, window sills, and door sills with a mixture of red pepper and sage to rid them of ants.

A smooth shiny egg shell is a sign of old age. Fresh eggs have a chalky rough shell

To make peeling hard-cooked eggs easier, butter your thumbs.

Link

From the Upcoming ueue, submitted by JKirchartz.

Weird.

Link via Slashfood

Casu marzu is a Sardinian cheese with the singularity to be pre-digested by cheese flies’ maggots.

Wait! it gets better : "Casu marzu is considered toxic when the maggots in the cheese have died. Because of this, only cheese in which the maggots are still alive is eaten" (from Wikipedia)

This documentary in German brings us closer to this old and tasty tradition.

My arteries are clogging just looking at it!

Link – via The Worley Gig