17 Strange Facts About Hitler

Posted by Alex in Bathroom Reader, Politics on September 17, 2007 at 12:52 am


The following is an article from Uncle John’s Supremely Satisfying Bathroom Reader

There’s nothing funny about Hitler, but he is endlessly fascinating. Since Congress passed the Nazi War Crimes Disclosure Act in 1998, almost 3 million classified files have been opened to the public - including a 1942 secret profile of Adolf Hitler compiled by the OSS. Here are some excerpts.

PERSONAL APPEARANCE

• Hitler never allows anyone to see him while he is naked or bathing. He refuses to use cologne or scents of any sort on his body

• No matter how warm he feels, Hitler will never take off his coat in public

• In 1923, Nazi press secretary Dr. Sedgwick tried to convince Hitler to get rid of his trademark mustache or grow it normally. Hitler answered: "Do not worry about my mustache. If it is not the fashion now, it will be later because I wear it!"

SOCIAL BEHAVIOR

• While dining with the others, Hitler will allow the conversation to linger on general topics, but after a couple of hours he will inevitably begin one of his many monologues. These speeches are flawless from start to finish because he rehearses them any time he gets a moment.

• His favorite topics include: "When I was a soldier," "When I was in Vienna," "When I was in prison," and "When I was the leader in the early days of the party."

• If Hitler begins speaking about Wagner and the opera, no one dares interrupt him. He will often sermonize on this topic until his audience falls asleep.

PERSONAL HABITS

• Hitler has no interest in sports or games of any kind and never exercised, except for an occasional walk.

• He paces frequently inside rooms, always to the same tune that he whistles to himself and always diagonally across the room, from corner to corner

• Hitler’s handwriting is impeccable. When famous psychologist Carl Jung saw Hitler’s handwriting in 1937, he remarked: "Behind this handwriting I recognize the typical characteristics of a man with essentially feminine instinct."

ENTERTAINMENT

• Hitler loves the circus. He takes real pleasure in the idea that underpaid performers are risking their lives to please him.

• He went to the circus on several occasions in 1933 and sent extremely expensive chocolates and flowers to the female performers. Hitler even remembered their names and would worry about them and their families in the event of an accident.

• He isn’t interested in wild animal acts, unless there is a woman in danger

• Nearly every night Hitler will see a movie in his private theatre, mainly foreign films that are banned to the German public. He loves comedies and will often laugh merrily at Jewish comedians. Hitler even liked a few Jewish singers, but after hearing them he would remark that it was too bad he or she wasn’t Aryan.

• Hitler staff secretly made films for him of torture and execution of political prisoners, which he very much enjoyed viewing. His executive assistants also secured pornographic pictures and movies for him.

• He loves newsreels - especially when he is in them.

• He adores gypsy music, Wagner’s operas, and especially American college football marches and alma maters.

• To excite the masses, he also uses American College football-style music during his speeches. His rallying cry - "Sieg Heil!" - was even modeled after the cheering techniques used by American football cheerleaders.

The article above is reprinted with permission from Uncle John’s Supremely Satisfying Bathroom Reader.

Since 1988, the Bathroom Reader Institute had published a series of popular books containing irresistible bits of trivia and obscure yet fascinating facts.

If you like Neatorama, you’ll love the Bathroom Reader Institute’s books - go ahead and check ‘em out!


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COMMENT

52 comments to "17 Strange Facts About Hitler"

  1. Adelaide
    September 17th, 2007 at 1:44 am

    I love how it’s all written in present tense :)

  2. Alex
    September 17th, 2007 at 2:26 am

    Yeah, that’s verbatim from the book.

  3. artbot
    September 17th, 2007 at 2:44 am

    Years ago, while browsing boxes of photos and documents at the National Archives, I came across a train ticket from a whistlestop tour that I believe Hitler made before the war. Whoever’s ticket it was managed to get it signed by him. It’s a very creepy feeling to hold something in your hand, even with a cotton glove on, that Hitler likely touched or held.

  4. Neato
    September 17th, 2007 at 3:54 am

    Hitler was also a speedfreak to the best of my knowledge.

  5. Jess
    September 17th, 2007 at 5:07 am

    He was charismatic, no doubt, but he was also evil.
    A dangerous combination.

  6. cacca
    September 17th, 2007 at 6:38 am

    hitler despised america and americans as far as I know.

  7. Tronfi
    September 17th, 2007 at 6:40 am

    Great article. Should I translate it into spanish to post it in my blog?

  8. Adam Stanhope
    September 17th, 2007 at 9:17 am

    He ruined that groovy mustache style for all men forever!

  9. L.B. Jeffries
    September 17th, 2007 at 9:40 am

    Man, I’ve been comparing football in America to fascism and ‘1984′ for years. It’s kinda disturbing to find out he was copying us the whole time. Go Gamecocks?

  10. anonymous
    September 17th, 2007 at 11:46 am

    seems that references might helpt support some of those anecdotes, such as the one about him enjoying execution and porno films…

    hitler was a vegetarian, which he felt helped his digestion (he suffered from digestion problems up until he adopted vegetarianism).

    the nazis did invent methamphetamines — they were designed as a “pep pill” for troops. hitler’s doctor administered daily shots of speed towards the end of the war.

  11. Jibson
    September 17th, 2007 at 1:20 pm

    “Hitler has no interest in sports or games of any kind and never exercised, except for an occasional walk.”
    He went for a walk for about an hour every afternoon, (as his bodyguard tells it) so your fact is false. He also won a medal in the First World War, that probably also required some sort of exercise.
    He never got up before midday is a true fact, and stayed up incredibly late instead.

  12. Bryan
    September 17th, 2007 at 3:41 pm

    I heard he was a scat freak too. That may just be Allied propaganda that, over the years, morphed into historical fact.

  13. Jester
    September 17th, 2007 at 3:50 pm

    His real name (at birth) was Alois Schicklgruber.

  14. ted
    September 17th, 2007 at 8:04 pm

    He also liked long walks, pina coladas, and cuddling.

  15. bob
    September 18th, 2007 at 12:13 am

    Will there ever be another Hitler? Probably. Possibly in America! He was a narcissitic psycopath.

  16. Ashutosh
    September 19th, 2007 at 8:50 pm

    Some say that Hitler loved Charlie Chaplin so much that the famous ‘Hitler Mustache’ was inspired by Chaplin’s.

  17. Chucky Chaps
    September 22nd, 2007 at 3:48 pm

    No, Chaplin was a parody of Hitler.

  18. BigwigRabbit
    September 22nd, 2007 at 6:24 pm

    Bob, you are an imbecile. You imply that America is a breeding ground for genocidal psychopaths. Take you r head out of you butt and move to North Korea or Zimbabwe so they can firmly ensconce it there again once and for all.

  19. BigwigRabbit
    September 22nd, 2007 at 6:26 pm

    That should read: Bob, you are an imbecile. You imply that America is a breeding ground for genocidal psychopaths. Take your head out of your butt and move to North Korea or Zimbabwe so they can firmly ensconce it there again once and for all. Sorry for the typos.

  20. eMM
    September 22nd, 2007 at 8:06 pm

    The Nazis did not invent methamphetamines. The Japanese did…., FYI. They began using them in WWII for the Kamikaze pilots, and then the Europeans got ahold of them.

  21. richard switch (notb4now)
    September 23rd, 2007 at 1:16 am

    Portions of this profile by the OSS were directly copied from a previously issued report by the British. It was compiled at the behest of the Prime Minister, Winston Churchill. That report was supposedly compiled by psychiatrist using information about Hitler to develop a psychiatric profile. It included references to deviant sexual behavior and all manor of insulting characteristics. It was then leaked so that Hitler would get wind of it. He was quite enraged, which was the intent of Churchill. If you can distract your enemy and get him to react on a personal level, it is an advantage. This is the report that gave rise to the belief that Hitler chewed on the carpet when things were not going his way. Many misconceptions about Hitler were perpetuated by this report. When you consider that Hitler did not consume alcohol or smoke and, that he was a vegetarian it might change your mind on what constitutes a peaceable person. We are still using the same approach to other adversaries in the 21st. Century. The question is does this type of portrayal benefit our leaders or us. Hitler was a mad dog and properly understanding him is what people need to make sure that new versions, large and small, can be stopped before they can do great harm. Based on the number of dangerous and insane leaders that have come to power since 1945 the supposedly sane leaders of the world are not doing a very good job. Using defamatory profiles in lieu of looking for the truth makes for good press copy but it does not stop the rise of Hitler’s.

  22. shirteesdotnet
    September 28th, 2007 at 3:49 pm

    George W. Bush also likes to take occasional walks. Hhhmmmmm.

  23. brandi
    October 15th, 2007 at 10:13 pm

    Hitler also loved animals and would get really upset when he saw one die or that was dead.

  24. ur mom
    October 16th, 2007 at 9:04 am

    Hitler was wierd

  25. ur mom
    October 16th, 2007 at 9:06 am

    OMG that is so cool!! Hitler was hottie!!

  26. ur mom
    October 16th, 2007 at 9:09 am

    ????i love Hitler???? i don’t know why you guys are dissing him! he deserves to be treated better! he is the love of my life! truely! i hope u all die!

  27. Omega Genius
    October 17th, 2007 at 1:27 am

    Hitler, was sodomised by a jew after he was overcharged for a loaf of bread and he could not afford it.
    He later went on to offer his body for food. He was between 10 and 15 years. His hatred for jews began there.
    Austria, Germany and Italy had the highest male prostitution at the time.

  28. Sammie
    October 18th, 2007 at 6:12 pm

    his ful name was Adolf Elizabeth Hitler!! ha ha and was a high school drop out!

  29. neilzo
    October 21st, 2007 at 12:47 pm

    hitler was a shithead i wish to kick his ass

  30. andy
    November 3rd, 2007 at 7:14 am

    What a knob.

  31. XP
    December 4th, 2007 at 1:50 pm

    ug

  32. mr me
    January 28th, 2008 at 8:46 am

    I like the way that it was written but the magazine from hitler’s bathroom was a load of pooh (*)

  33. know-it-all
    February 12th, 2008 at 8:36 pm

    Hitler was a weird man i studied him and wow did you know he loved beer, opera and, he was a high school drop out

  34. ccface
    March 4th, 2008 at 7:56 pm

    Adolf is brilliant. Disagree with that, and your ass shall be kicked. D:<

    Hitler = <3

  35. Sven Hassel
    March 9th, 2008 at 3:28 pm

    Every day, Hitler would have a newborn Jewish baby delivered from one of the camps, for his huge baronial banquetting table, where the infant would be placed on a silver platter for carving after it had been roasted in an oven.

    While the baby was roasting, and inbetween listening with joy to the sound of it’s cries, Hitler would arrange the culterly and condiments on the table into armies - and then reenact a famous battle like Sevastapol, with a fruit bowl serving as the doomed city.

    After he had dined on the best cuts from the baby, he would toss the remains of the carcass to his pet Alsatian dog, Blondi, and fall asleep in his throne, muttering in fits and starts under his breath about wonder weapons, and the invincibility of Tiger tanks.

  36. Samantha
    March 17th, 2008 at 12:38 pm

    Adolf Hitler was freakin’ genuis! And Alios was his father…the last name was Alios’ mom’s name. Alios was an illegitimate child! Men in power are so damn fine! damn he is so hot.

  37. Aren
    March 19th, 2008 at 2:26 pm

    thanks a lot for this it helped me a ton on my English paper on hitler.

  38. NO Anus Required
    April 9th, 2008 at 1:24 pm

    HItler is a sexy beast!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Germany FTW!!!!
    G G NOoOOOoOB!!!!!!on111oone111!!!!11111!!

  39. JayceVonnSpears
    April 16th, 2008 at 7:11 pm

    Hitler was a very intelligent individual..and he was great at manipulating people..
    Oh yeah and, his middle name was Elizabeth.
    A bit weird, but oh well.

  40. jake howard stead
    May 14th, 2008 at 5:36 am

    hitler sux lol so does the book ps hitlers still allive ill prove it!!!

  41. jesskaa
    May 24th, 2008 at 10:21 pm

    hitler can suck my dick
    butim a girl and dnt hav 1 lol

  42. anonymous
    May 28th, 2008 at 1:30 am

    hitler hated jews. i duno if anyone knew that.

  43. HB!
    June 2nd, 2008 at 5:06 pm

    Hitler was an evil man in which is one of the most hated villians of all time. He could justify eating young newborns, likke eww! I am doing a essay on his attempt at a world government! and well he was power-crazed, manulpative pscyhopath who hated jews and ate babies! Like wow!

  44. lozz
    June 12th, 2008 at 2:01 am

    these r da same facts as 20 other websites hav

  45. Dvid Stoz
    September 6th, 2008 at 7:12 pm

    As a historian I never read such primative hate filled drival….Hitler was a product of his time,and rose to power to combat Communism,in Germany and to break the Versailes treaty over his country and central Europe.He created many innovations socia politically and scientificaly.Winston Churchill was a monstrous drunk,who revelled in destruction.Roosevelt a demented egomanic toward the end,and there Allie. Stalin a beast.They demanded the unconditional surrender of the Axis.Hitler always hoped for settlement.Churchill said in 1943 in Queebec.”We will never offer Hiler terms;”He will immediately accept.” The OSS report was hate-filled drival,dismissed by every good historian.Red meat for hate-filled Americans

  46. jesus walks with me
    October 10th, 2008 at 7:11 pm

    Let god decide his fate its not going to be good

  47. jesus walks with me
    October 10th, 2008 at 7:13 pm

    dvid stoz stop being racist what your saying is a load of turd

  48. samantha cook
    October 22nd, 2008 at 9:16 am

    he liked to wear thongs

  49. zach
    November 17th, 2008 at 11:34 am

    hi im zach and i like my girlfriend and i only have one testicle

  50. jas
    November 25th, 2008 at 9:07 pm

    its really good i have a project about hitler and that thinghis helped me

  51. elisha
    November 26th, 2008 at 6:30 am

    hi why do you have to say this about him.did you know that hitler when he stood to talk to the public he would continously speak for more than 3hours.the famous beetles(volks wagens)were introduced during his reign.suck you all who hate hitler..

  52. Sammikins
    December 1st, 2008 at 7:59 pm

    Half of this crap you kids are saying isn’t true, I’m sorry but this is bothering how stupid you can be, he is an idiotic man. Just think of it this way, he managed what white people did to black people, the Americans did to the Indians, and Africans do to each other, but in a shorter period of time, thats the only reason he is penalized so badly. I’m not saying he shouldn’t be, but don’t think any less of him then you do of the other political leaders who fucked with other races.

    His middle name was not Elizabeth, a rumor that derived from his mother mentioning to a friend that if he turned out a girl, that’s what his name would be.

    He never indulged on babies, he was in fact a vegetarian.

    If you want a really interesting fact, try this.

    Think about all of the people that were murdered under his regime, now picture him dining at a restraunt.
    He hears the lobster scream, as it hits the boiling point. You see, they are slowly boiled until death, so he felt pty for them right?
    Crazy I know, but he passed the Crustean Laws, which stated you had to put them in boiling water at the start, and only one at a time if possible.
    I know it sounds crazy, but my history teacher gave me a book to read about him, Adolf Hitler, The Psychopathic God, or something to that effect, and there is a section about that.
    Not a rumor, not some bullshit story made to make him look worse, the truth.
    And an odd fact =]

    Later kids


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