I had never heard of Avner the Eccentric until a couple days ago. I've missed out on so much!

Avner Eisenberg has spent decades perfecting his crafts, which include clowning, prestidigitation, pantomime, and acting. Every detail in his staging, movement, and expression is executed at genius level. He is a wonder to watch.

You can watch a much longer performance here.

-via reddit

The Glenlivet is a brand of refined Scotch whisky. It is an icon of high taste and sophistication.

So people like you and I probably wouldn't even reach for a bottle. So The Glenlivet wants to reach us where we are.

Eating Tide laundry detergent pods is so 2018. But let's give The Glenlivet plaudits for at least trying to keep up with the times. The distiller now offers its aged whisky in packets that you can safely swallow whole. Food and Wine magazine reports:

Speyside distillery The Glenlivet—the world's second best-selling brand of Scotch—has unveiled its "Capsule Collection," described as "glassless cocktails" that are instead served in a casing produced from seaweed-extract, billed as "one of nature's most renewable resources." (Apparently, reusable glassware just isn't sustainable enough!) Each capsule contains 23 milliliters of booze that can be enjoyed simply by popping the whole thing in your mouth and biting for "an instant burst of flavor." Drinkers can then simply swallow the capsule which is "fully biodegradable" (which hopefully could have gone without saying!)

-via Ian Miles Cheong | Photo: The Glenlivet

It can take Anais Hayden seven hours to complete a dog's haircut and dye job. But people will wait patiently for this groomer in Atlanta, Georgia to complete her work because the results are absolutely fabulous.

How many scoops would you like today? You can't go wrong with ice cream, right?

Although you may balk at ice cream flavored to taste like guinea pig meat, people in Ecuador might not. In that nation, guinea pigs are more likely to be a source of food rather than pets.

And so food stall owner María del Carmen Pilapaña has developed an ice cream flavor that many people enjoy. The Associated Press reports:

Pilapaña’s operation is small. It consists of two tables in an open area lined with dentists’ clinics and other businesses. Even so, demand is growing. Every week, the entrepreneur prepares 150 servings ($1 for a cone) of guinea pig ice cream. [...]

Pilapaña manages to concentrate guinea pig flavor after cooking and preparing a pate from the animal’s flesh, adds milk or cream and refrigerates the concoction until it has the rough consistency of ice cream. The taste is similar to chicken.

The beetle and mushroom ice creams include fruits such as pineapple and passion fruit. Beetle ice cream has a slight aroma of wet earth.

-via Dave Barry | Photo: AP/Dolores Ochoa

Stephanie Porkorny is a master of the crochet hook. Every year, she asks her kids to choose what they will dress up as for Halloween. This year, Jake chose the xenomorph from the Alien franchise.

45 hours of work later, the boy is ready to hunt for prey. The entire project was done freehand with no patterns. The green-tinted yarn is glow-in-the-dark, which will be especially terrifyingly adorable on Halloween night.

-via Aaron Starmer

Recently, police officers in Derbyshire, UK noticed a car with this tire. The driver was dropping off kids at school. The officers pointed out the problem and urged the driver to get the tire replaced immediately.

What do you think caused these bubbles to form on the tire?

-via Dave Barry | Photo: Derbyshire Police

Every year, tourists go missing from New York City. That's because Mayor Ed Koch (r. 1978-1989) released wild wolves into the subway tunnels to check the threat of graffiti vandalism. Unfortunately, the wolves thrived in their subterranean environment, bred, and now stray outside of the subway system at night to hunt in packs.

Now brace yourselves: this is just an urban legend. It began as a joke that Mayor Koch made when he was asked for a solution to the subway graffiti problem.

Artist Joe Reginella has played with that urban legend by creating fake monuments to the fallen tourists and placed them around New York City. Ostensibly, these are sponsored by the Ed Koch Wolf Foundation and serve to remind people that all city parks close at dusk. Tourists who choose to remain in parks after dark do so at their own risk.

Reginella has created similar monuments for historically significant but probably equally fictitious events, such as alien encounters and sea monster attacks on the Staten Island Ferry. You can read about them at Hi-Fructose.

The University of Washington's Husky Stadium is on the shoreline of Seattle's Union Bay. It's possible to watch football games from the water, which has led to the practice of "sailgating" -- watching and partying from boats anchored just offshore.

To Wendy's, that's an untapped market. So the company built a barge with a complete Wendy's restaurant on it and floated it out for Huskies fans.

-via Super Punch | Photo: Darren Rovell

David Tracy of Jalopnik found this amazing luxury vehicle for sale on Facebook Marketplace. You might not normally think of the Ford Festiva as an example of elite performance automotive design, but this one takes two 1993 Festivas and slams them together to create the ultimate ride for a first date, the prom, or a VIP motorcade. It's only $2,000 and, according to the seller, street legal.

If you go halvsies with me, we can catch a bus to its home in Kearney, Missouri and drive it home together.

Why do dogs leap at the opportunity to stick their heads out of car windows while riding? Megan Schmidt of Discover magazine runs through several possible motives. The first is that dogs' sense of smell is so strong that sniffing all of that passing air is a exhilarating sensation to them:

The canine olfactory system is highly developed and far superior to ours. For starters, a dog’s nose is equipped with a complex maze of 300 million scent receptors, compared to our measly 5 million. The more receptors, the more sensitive the nose is.

And dog noses aren’t just cute — they’re practically designed to savor smells. Dogs have two air passages, one for breathing and one dedicated to smelling. To top things off, the canine olfactory cortex, the part of the brain responsible for processing smells, is 40 times larger than that of a human.

[...]

“When sticking their head out the window, they can smell every person in the street, every trash can they go by, every patch of grass, restaurant and other dogs. It’s like watching TV for us,” says Jennifer Cattet, an animal behavior researcher and owner of Medical Mutts, a service dog training center in Indianapolis.

Additionally, dogs may enjoy the passing sights, the air blowing on their faces, and the opportunity to contemplate escape.

-via Instapundit | Photo: Dane

Twitter user @mattomic, author of the famous Sandwich Alignment Chart, presents his assessment of which food mascots he thinks that he could or could not take in a fight. I think that he underestimates Lefty, the mascot of Hamburger Helper. Lefty has always stuck me as having the capacity to suddenly snap one day. He won't limit himself to just his fist.

-via Ian Miles Cheong

We have video surveillance of them grabbing as many penises as they can and taking off!

Be on the lookout for the couple photographed above. According to a Facebook post published by Pet Zone, a pet store in St. Johns, Newfoundland, Canada, they stole hundreds of dollars of bull penises and ran off. They then tried to pull a similar robbery at another Pet Zone, but failed.

Why does a pet store sell bull penises? I'm disappointed that you have to ask. But here it is: these are "pizzles," which is a slang term for rawhide chews that dogs use. The word originally comes from the Old English word for penis.

You're welcome.

-via Dave Barry

Zach of Extra Fabulous Comics need not worry about the impact that he has had on the world. Some webcomic artists waste only dozens of lives. But, like the Phaethon of Greek myth, he strove for greater things. What he has done to his readers is his eternal monument.

Graz, a maker on YouTube, turned an old circular saw blade into this polished metal pizza cutter that is as elegant and refined as the Wu-Tang Clan that inspired it.

The video is worthy watching in full. Not only is it funny with sound effects and scripting like a comedy sketch, it is also highly educational. I was impressed with how much went into heating, cooling, and tempering the steel so that it became a vicious weapon against all pizzas that it encounters.

-via Geekologie

It's so easy for a faulty accusation to brand a person for life due to a mugshot circulating the internet. So I'm glad that, when RTV Utrecht reported on this parakeet's arrest by the local police, they placed a bar over his eyes to obscure his identity.

In this case, the police arrested a man for shoplifting who, at the time, had the bird on his shoulder. Not knowing what to do with the bird, they locked him in a holding cell and gave him some bread while processing him. You can read the German report here or what Google Translate offers in English.

-via Nag on the Lake