(Photo: Steiff Shop)

I'm laying down a marker here: the toy that every child will want this Christmas and that parents will be desperately hunting for through stores on December 24 is the Teddytaur. It's half teddy bear and half centaur. Rocket News 24 reports that this stuffed animal by the German toymaker Steiff measures 30 inches tall and sells online for about $410. And it's worth every penny!

Don't go after cheap substitutes, like a merfish doll (half mermaid, half fish) or harpoach (half harpy, half roach). When your child opens the gifts under the tree, you'd better make sure that a Teddytaur is there.

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The key phrase that a father must say in this scenario is: "Don't tell your mother about this."

Jarrad Provost of Fredericksburg, Virginia attached a leaf blower to his son Roman's Power Wheels battery-powered toy car. This means that the tyke is ready to take on the chore of clearing off fallen leaves--a task normally given to an older child.

The car may not have enough power to move over rough terrain, so I suggest setting Roman up on an ATV for other areas. Then hire him out to the neighbors. Cut Roman in for a percentage, and Provost has a profitable business in the making.

-via Technabob

(Photo: Denise Thynne)

Man's best friend may be a dog, but this woman loves her cat especially well right now.

Denise Thynne, 66, of Mirani, Queensland, Australia went out into her yard to water her roses. When she reached down to pick up her hose, a snake lunged out of the bushes and bit her.

It was a red-bellied black snake. It might have tried for a second bite, but it didn't get the chance. Thynne's cat, Skitzo, leaped into action. ABC News reports:

"She came out stalking and it looked like she was mesmerising it and then she just went in for the kill," Ms Thynne said.

"I turned the snake over and saw the red belly and thought 'oh that's not a very friendly one'."

Recall that this incident took place in Australia, the country where nature is most determined to kill you. Thynne is highly experienced at getting bitten by snakes:

Ms Thynne said she was well versed in what to do, as it was the fourth time she had been bitten by a snake.

She is not keen on a fifth experience.

"I'm a bit of a pro at this snake business," she said.

"My mum always said it'll be a snake that kills me, so yeah, I'm not really planning on one [a fifth experience], but who knows.

-via Nothing to Do with Aborath

Google has many Easter eggs hidden in its code. For example, you can search "do a barrel roll" to see a visual effect, "once in a blue moon" to see a precise calculation, and the "answer to life the universe and everything" to see what you get when you multiply six by nine.

To celebrate the release of Star Wars: The Force Awakens, Google made another Easter egg for Star Wars fans. If you Google "a long time ago in a galaxy far far away," you'll see the search results displayed to look like the text crawl in the original trilogy.

-via Nerd Approved

UPDATE 11/25/15: It only works in Chrome and Safari. Thanks for the pointer, Miss C.

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In the English language, we call the country Germany. In French, it's Allemange. In Danish, it's Tyskland. In German, it's the nation of Deutschland.

Why do the European languages have so many different-sounding names for one country? Akira Okrent, a linguist, and Sean O'Neill, an artist, explain in this video how Germany's neighbors created widely divergent names for it.

-via Blame It on the Voices

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Put down the phone, fellow fathers. Right now, you're supposed to be watching your kids. They're not safe out of your sight for even a second. Just glance away to read or send a text and the worst thing has happened to your precious children in that moment.

Dad Dudes, which is a comedy production group consisting of four real-life dads, created this thoughtful PSA to warn dads to stop texting and start paying attention.

-via Laughing Squid

(Photo: AFP)

When is the best time to play bagpipes? The answer is: always. It is always appropriate to play the bagpipes, for they are the world's most beautiful musical instrument.

We've heard them played in space. We've heard them played on a unicycle. Now, thanks to enterprising soldiers in Pakistan, we can now hear the melodious sounds of the pipes by men on camels.

A year ago, the Pakistan Desert Rangers formed a camel-mounted military marching band that includes bagpipers. This has not been easy, as the camels have had to learn how to adjust to this new work and the pipers have had to learn how to play on bouncing camels. Dawn magazine reports:

“It is very difficult to play the bagpipe while sitting on the camel," admits piper Muhammad Hussain. “But we have now learned the art."

The band, part of the Pakistan Desert Rangers, was formed last year after hundreds of animals went out of service, reduced by the latest military patrol vehicles to doing mere donkey's work — that is until the idea to dress them in bunting and put bagpipers on their backs was born.

After making their debut before startled spectators at Pakistan's National Day parade in Islamabad in March, they are now deployed in Moj Garh, 100 kilometres east of Bahawalpur in Punjab province, where they drill daily in preparation for a potential international career.

We can only hope that these pipers and their camels get to travel the world in order to share the joy of bagpipe music.

-via Super Punch

Maria Bradley is a special effects and makeup artist. Among other media, she paints the bellies of pregnant women.

We've seen baby bump paintings before, but Bradley takes this trendy art form to a whole new level. She's a special effects artist, so she knows how to add an element of horror to the experience. For her own belly, she created a 3d form of her child breaking out. She explained the process to Baby Center UK:

With special effects I love to shock people. I brought a second-hand doll and casted the face using clay then pored Kryolan Gelafix skin into the clay mould. I removed the cast and glued it to my own belly. I then used liquid latex and tissue to cover the moulds to try and make it look like the baby is pushing its head through the skin. I then painted it all with foundation to blend it in with my skin tone.

-via io9

(Photo: Tara Smith-Adkins)

Tara Smith-Adkins of Halifax, Nova Scotia wants to make sure that the homeless people in her town don't want for warm winter coats. So every year, she rounds up local kids to walk around town, tying coats and scarves to trees and signposts in the area.

(Photo: Halifolks)

This year, the event served as her daughter's eighth birthday party. She and seven of her friends tied up the coats with little tags explaining what they were for. The CBC reports:

The children wrapped lamp poles with coats bundled with either scarves or mittens. Each item had a tag that read "I am not lost! If you are stuck out in the cold, please take me to keep warm!"

-via 123 Inspiration

(Photos: Sina)

This majestic tree is a testament to the beauty of nature and thoughtful gardening. For 1,400 years, this gingko has shaded the Guanyin Zen Temple in the Zhongnan mountains of China. Legend holds that Emperor Li Shimin, a Tang dynasty emperor, planted it for the temple, which was built in 628 A.D.

Every year, the gingko tree drops its leaves in a cascade of vibrant yellow. This attracts tourists from far away who travel to see this wonder. You can see more photos of it here.

-via This Is Colossal

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Ase Marie Nordhagen, 90, of Norway loves soccer, especially the task of "keep ups." This is keeping a ball in the air by bouncing it off one foot continuously. She's been practicing since she was a little girl, once performing 1,000 without dropping it.

Now she's good for about 50 keep ups at a time, thanks to up to an hour of practice per day. Nordhagen loves it so much that, she explained to a Norwegian newspaper, "I can't go past the ball in the hallway without picking it up and performing a few tricks."

Try to keep up with her.

The Imperial fleet is approaching our position quickly, but I don't want to leave. The ships look so yummy! Surely a warship that presents itself as a delicious treat can't be all that bad.

Roland Tamayo's art is noted for its surreal blending of nature and everyday objects. His current exhibition, titled "Collection of Curiosities," is at the Flower Pepper Gallery in Pasedena, California. What do his edible Super Star Destroyers mean? Tamayo explains:

These pieces are a collection of treats enjoyed by my sons, along with nostalgic treats from my childhood, connected by a mutual love and enjoyment of Star Wars. One of my favorite childhood memories was going to Fedco here in Pasadena, who employed my grandfather as an Optometrist. Because of his employment there, we would go often to buy family supplies, toys, etc., at a discount, and there would always be Toblerone candy at the checkout isle. It was my first introduction to that candy, and whenever I see it, it reminds me of my grandfather. Never would I have thought that a Toblerone candy would be a subject of a painting, especially combined with a Star Destroyer. But I'm so grateful for this opportunity, that it has.

-via Khool

So you've lost a tire but don't have a spare to put on your car. What would you do? I'm stumped.

But the driver of this SUV in St. Petersburg, Russia wasn't. The Moscow Times reports that he was driving at about 50 kph (31 mph). Hopefully the local police will log the incident as a safety violation.

-via Dave Barry, who warns "steer clear of beavers."

UPDATE 11/25/15: In the comments, Frau directs us to this complete photo gallery of how this car lost its tire and the driver replaced it with a log--until the log was worn down. Thanks, Frau!

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Over the course of the Star Wars story, Darth Vader lost six of his four limbs. Luke Skywalker famously lost his now highly collectible right hand. That injury earned him a kiss from resident hottie Leia. Advantage: Luke.

Other characters in Star Wars got off less well. Video editor Pablo Fernández Eyre, who once illustrated the visual symmetry in the movies, now shows this compilation of all of the traumatic amputations performed with lightsabers over the course of Star Wars. It's a total of 26 by my count.

-via Geekologie

(Photo: Brian Delaurenti and Johnathan Dahla)

To complete your lumbersexual look, you need not just a plaid flannel shirt and an axe casually carried over your shoulder. You also need a dazzling splash of glitter through your beard.

(Photo: Anastasia Elliot)

iDigital Times (auto-start video) reports that this marvelous trend is sweeping Instagram. If you want your own glitter beard, you'll need a smoothly shaped beard that has been well-oiled with a quality beard oil. This is the only way to prevent your glitter from spreading everywhere.