The industrious mudskipper is building a home. He sucks in mouthfuls of sand, then spits them out away from the rock. Soon, a cozy cave forms.
The starfish thinks that he can simply take the house away. It's just a matter of sliding in, like your friend who invites himself over to your house and then won't leave, even when you put on your pajamas and get ready for bed.
-via Tastefully Offensive
Jen Lindsey-Clark, the Chocolatican, has been busy this month. As a master chocolate artist, her skills are in high demand this Easter. We've previously seen her chocolate Easter bunny made to look like Benedict Cumberbatch. If you have a larger appetite, then she has prepared a feast for you.
An Aldi supermarket in Brighton, UK commissioned Lindsey-Clark to sculpt a 4-place full meal made entirely of chocolate, right down to the furniture. She used 50 kilograms of chocolate, which should be plenty. You can see more photos at ITV News.
-via Foodiggity
(Photo: Transmash-Omsk)
If firefighters need to respond to a call to a bad neighborhood, this would be the way to arrive in safety and style.
The Omsktransmash СПМ is the Russian Army's new armored firefighting vehicle. It's a 60-ton tracked vehicle made from T-72 and T-80 tank parts. Jalopnik reports:
“СПМ is designed to extinguish fires and conduct rescue operations in the arsenals, bases and warehouses storing explosives, clearing the aisles to the fire, laying firebreaks in forest fires,” the company explains. […]
Only three people crew the behemoth firefighting tank, which looks to be about 30 meters long. It holds 25 cubic meters of water and other extinguishing agents, which it can spray up to a 100 meters.
I want one. You know--for puttering around town and going shopping.
It's not your toddler's fault that he had an accident. The potty is safe only when you're there. Otherwise, the potty monster visits. If he goes there instead of in his pants, it will snatch him and pull him in.
This isn't a real horror movie . . . yet. But it could be one. Andy Herald of How to Be a Dad has 6 great pitches to offer producers. They're terrify any toddler at bedtime, which is, of course, precisely what every parent of a toddler wants to do.
(Photo: You Lie in April t-shirt on sale at the NeatoShop)
It's the end of the world as we know it, which is why I watch anime instead of the news. I've watched a lot in the past few months. So, as usual, I will tell you some of the best and ask you, dear readers, to recommend other titles.
Erased (Boku Dake ga Inai Machi) is the greatest anime I have ever seen. I recommend it for not only anime fans, but also to non-anime fans.
Anime is like beer. You either like it or can't understand why anyone would consume it. Erased, however, is an anime perfect even for people who don't like anime.
It's a thriller and murder mystery. The main character is Satoru Fujinima, a 29-year old failed manga artist. He finds himself thrown back in time to when he was 10 years old. Back then, his peaceful childhood was upended by a serial killer who murdered several young girls in his town, including some in his own class.
Satoru realizes that he has a chance to find the killer and stop him. In the body of his 10-year old self, he sets out to do precisely that.
Erased is an original story with an unpredictable plot and vivid characterization. The suspense in every episode demands eager anticipation of the next episode. It is brilliantly written and directed.
Will Stephen is a comedian with the Upright Citizens Brigade and a writer who has published with the New Yorker, New York Magazine, and CollegeHumor.
Will Stephen is smart. You can tell because he's delivering a TED Talk. Only smart people get to deliver TED Talks. And, more importantly, only smart people watch and--if at all possible--attend TED Talks in person.
So if you cannot attend a TED Talk yourself, then make sure that you are seen in public watching a recording of one. Or just link to a TED Talk on social media and tell people how meaningful it was to you.
This particular TED Talk would be a good pick. It will prepare you to deliver your own TED Talk, as Stephen explains in detail how to enunciate, gesticulate, and obfuscate in ways that will make you appear intelligent to people who like to watch TED Talks. You know--smart people like you.
-via Swiss Miss
When he's awake, he's a normal dog. When he's asleep, he becomes a voice over artist. This Labrador sounds just like a stereotypical cartoon character snoring.
He's so loud that I'm surprised that he doesn't wake himself up!
-via Tastefully Offensive
(Photo: Piers Allardyce)
Tracey Emin (content warning: nudity) is an artist. You've probably heard of her. Emin's art is so notable that she once won the Turnip Prize. Perhaps you've seen her unmade bed on exhibit at the Tate. So you can expect unique takes on creative expression from Emin.
But enough about her work. Let us congratulate Emin on her recent nuptials. The lucky groom is a rock that resides in her home garden. The Guardian reports:
As her latest exhibition I Cried Because I Love You opens in Hong Kong, the woman whose life is her art has revealed that last summer she married a venerable stone that stands in her garden in France. “Somewhere on a hill facing the sea, there is a very beautiful ancient stone, and it’s not going anywhere,” she has said. “It will be there, waiting for me.” In another interview she has called it “‘an anchor, something I can identify with”. She wore her father’s funeral shroud as a wedding dress. As Lou Reed says: “And no kinds of love / are better than others.”
How did they meet? Fionnuala McHugh of Post Magazine interviewed Emin. She asked about the origin of this fairytale romance. Their meeting was sheer serendipity:
"It was totally by accident, the whole thing wasn't intentional," she begins. But I'm a bit confused. Is she talking about the day she's telling Freedman? Or the day of her wedding to the stone? "Noooo," she cries in frustration (rightly so, I listened to the tape afterwards and sounded like a moron). "I was on my own."
There's a pause, and the distinct feeling that upon this rocky moment hangs the future of our encounter.
"The whole thing with the stone is - it's a big f***ing stone, right. It's in my garden, it's very nice and very impressive and I like it a lot. [Sigh.] The other thing about the stone is that it could be quite monstrous and scary. Instead I saw it as a protection thing as opposed to a fearful thing. The other thing with the stone is it's not going anywhere. Even if there's the biggest f***ing tsunami in the whole f***ing world, the stone will probably still stay there."
-via Ace of Spades HQ
Well, that's nice. But should you really be pushing Hogwarts so hard? That's a lot of pressure on an infant. What if he wants to go to Ilvermorny or Texas A&M?
To their credit, Tiffany Nicole and her husband are at least doing their best to dream big dreams for their child. This is the fourth baby. They've long wanted a Harry Potter nursery and decided that this was the time. The result is a room that filled with quotations, images, and artifacts from Rowling's magical universe. You can see more photos at BuzzFeed.
Okay, fine: the missing spot is for Tasha Yar. Did you really have to ask right in front of them? Now you've upset them. I can't take you anywhere.
I'm having trouble tracking down the origin of these wooden peg dolls showing characters from the original series and The Next Generation. I suspect that they're from a now-closed Etsy shop because that's where the internet trail runs cold.
-via Tor
A duvet is a British term for a fluffy comforter. To encourage people to sleep more, the Jurys Inn Hotel Group in the UK made suits made from these soft pieces of bedding. In a way, it's like staying in bed all day. If you ever feel the need to nap, you don't have to search for a bed because you're already in one. Just lie down wherever you are, even if it's in the office or on the Underground.
You can see more photos at a video at Bored Panda.
-via Nag on the Lake
(Photo: unknown)
Somewhere in the world, for the modern urban cowboy, there is the basketball boot. You can be the master of the court and corral for a mere $200.
These are apparently Tony Lama brand boots. Sadly, they appear to have been discontinued. It was inevitable, though. All the great cowboys eventually ride off into the sunset.
-via Geekologie
It's only March, but Imgur member rentdownstairs has already locked up the Father of the Year competition. He "wanted to get a custom crib to pass down as an heirloom to our children." So he commissioned Atlanta-based woodworker Garrick Andus to carve a crib inspired by the horror imagery of H.P. Lovecraft. Its spreading, writhing, all-consuming tentacles express the hopes that all of us fathers have for their children.
-via Nerd Approved
(Photo: Satish Krishnamurthy)
Axe body spray is the preferred fragrance of refined, sophisticated gentlemen around the world. But not everyone is sufficiently cultured to recognize it.
On Friday, people in a church in Seattle found fumes emerging from a backpack left in a bathroom. They evacuated the church and daycare center. Firefighters called in a hazmat team to investigate the source of the aroma. It was a can of Axe. MyNorthwest reports:
A backpack left in a bathroom was giving off "cough inducing fumes" on March 18, according to the Seattle Police Department. That prompted a call to 911. After responding to the scene, fire crews called in a hazmat team to handle the noxious fumes.
After the church building was evacuated, and a neighboring daycare, and the surrounding streets were blocked off, the team ventured into the fume-filled bathroom.
It didn't take long, however, for the team to identify the source of the offending vapors. The can of Axe body spray was found to be malfunctioning and continuously giving off the fumes.
-via Dave Barry
Like any sensible person, I plan to spend the Easter weekend month eating nothing but Cadbury Creme Egg-based foods. For dinner today, I'll serve my family donuts made to look like the famous eggs. Chrisy of the food blog Homemade Hooplah offers a recipe for these instantly-recognizable donuts. The filling is made of corn syrup, butter, vanilla, and Cool Whip. The frosting is, appropriately, made from Cadbury-brand chocolate.
-via Tasteologie
