All it needs is purple hearts, blue diamonds and green clovers moving across the rainbow.

No spam and spam, or spam spam spam and spam, or spam eggs and spam, or spam spam eggs and spam, or even just plain spam?

I can see the Rolling Stones hanging in there, but I don't know about this. The picture reminds me more of "The Usual Suspects" than teeny boppers. It just seems wrong.

"smells like cabbage"

Speaking of the monkey in diapers, did you notice the article on the two SWAT officers that brought their children along for a drug raid? What were they thinking?

It's nice to see a celebrity actually doing something good with their status. I wish I were related to Mr. T, I'd think I'd really enjoy the family reunions.

If I were running in a marathon (not likely to happen) and I saw a Masai warrior in tribal clothing carrying a spear and shield behind me, I think I would run a hell of a lot faster (that would actually happen). I'm curious to see what their presence will mean to the other contestants.

I've never been to England but I was in Toulon, France once. The people there pee in bushes and trees in front of God and everybody. One guy was standing on the sidewalk peeing on the side of building. I had to cross the street to walk past him. He waved at me.

I can't wait to read the post race news coverage.

Ted - only if it's a "nice" chianti. Fah, fah, fah, fah, fah.

I think the Federal Reserve should bail me out of my ignorance by throwing copious amounts of money at me in a desperate attempt to get me to learn my dead presidents (and other persons of high importance).

I can't run my mouth without having to catch my breath.

Did Portuguese nuns really have such tight fitting clothes?

Thank god he wasn't fencing.

I see the source material for Pixar's next Uber hit film.

I find nothing, absolutely nothing, attractive about a woman who would wear or ingest a pig's placenta (or any other mammal of choice).

I mean how did they come up with this idea in the first place? I know that some mammals eat their own palcenta. Did the pig farmer notice that the mother pig's skin was more soft and supple after she ate her own (or somebody else's) afterbirth? Or did the pig farmer's wife get sprayed with this stuff and the pig farmer found himself thinking that he had never found his wife so beautiful before.

My guess is that the pig farmer said 'yuck' (you've got to think that something that would make a pig farmer go 'yuck' has got to be bad) and thought how can I get rid of this slop? Then the epiphany: "I'll sell it as a beauty product. Something this ugly and gross has got to make women beautiful."

But what if aliens had landed on Earth and a mosquito bit an alien and the mosquito has alien blood in it and the scientist cloned the alien from the alien blood and then you have humanity enslaved?