AFLAC!

From the notebooks of Jack Handy:

"To me, clowns aren't funny. In fact, they're kinda scary. I've wondered where this started, and I think it goes back to the time I went to the circus and a clown killed my dad."

Cute little stinker.

But are they hot to trot?

Technically brilliant, but I didn't laugh once. It's the same grotesque, non-sequitur 'spastoid' humor that blares from the cartoon networks all day.

Neatly beautiful.

I feel such pity for the officers who must do the searching.

I prefer my chocolate without the nuts.

What an interesting study in faith, though, whether it is the faith of religion, belief in UFOs, ghosts, or a pet scientific theory. The need to believe or not seems to be built deep into our emotional framework, so that we often just use logic and reason to reinforce what we already have decided in our heart.

That being said, I noticed that the ghost draws like a dyslexic.

Even IF they could break into my house to show me the limits of my security, I still wouldn't buy from them. It's much like a computer virus infecting your computer, then trying to sell you virus protection.

Now there's an image of Dr. Phil I didn't need.

Amazing how many inventors there are, peddling their ideas.

Wood ladders are a step up from aluminum.

I just know that someone is going to get tased by monkeys.

For a little more flair next time, have them all dress as V.