Caption:
"You want me to walk on all fours? WTF?"

Shirt: I blame hipsters

Caption:
"Yoohoo! Aliens! Helloooooo! Get me out of here!!!"

Shirt:
I blame hipsters

Caption:
Tis a far greater thing that I do today than I have ever done before in the woods.

Shirt Choice:
XL - I-Blame-Hipsters

hmmm, doesn't do "pseudo intellectual" --- but puts on a stylish pose! and uses the word "irony" in the title of a picture of a bull, carved in leather. I smell "psuedo!"
He poses dressed like a hipster in club-gear, holding a knife that he couldn't use to do work of that scale (leather tools have different blades and handles and are held differently) -- he'd destroy his wrist in less than an hour if he did more than just pose that way.
Nothing to stop him from trying to pull that off, though.