Madame Bovary, c'est moi.

minoxidil worked for the monkeys, but not for me... :-(

I heard that they were going to try to cover it up through the installation of solar panels and various landscape modifications!

"You’re so pretty, I would kiss you if you didn’t have puke breath."

Reminds me of the naked guy (with full-on chubby) gracing the pack of Camels cigarettes!

Everyone else just calls you c*cksuckers.

Which one(s) will be CheneyHalliburton's new pad?

This is not the first time a hero employee has being fired for breaking some rule about e.g. "not resisting a robbery". Google search "employee resisting a robbery" for tons more.

So what if this hero waiter had been killed "on the job"? Was that car worth this guy's life?

That guy in the bear-proof suit was way cooler.

There's always work at the post office.

27.6 cameras! Man, that's a lot of camera.

No, it's more like, fuck the police

Now if he can only figure out a way to engineer my testicles to produce this stuff...

You know what I'd love for lunch? Fresh asparagus, then, um, pasta - angel hair pasta with heaps of basil, garlic, olive oil and, uh, apple pie. Uh, John, have you got a towel?

Pardon our dust, here we GROW again!