Of course all the old people died - as a kid, I was allowed to become attached to grandparents, great-aunts and great-uncles, and of course none of them lived to see me graduate high school.
But also there were "early" deaths - people don't expect to die in their 40s and 50s, but it happens.
A lot.
My memories are clouded by grief. I see my grandfather smiling in photographs and I simply can't remember him except as he was after he lost his wife and his sisters. I remember lots of grief. I missed all the good times - I see in the photographs that there were good times, but they waited until they were through living to have me join them.
It makes me angry because I remember having this huge family when I was a kid - I remember crowded Thanksgiving dinners, and I simply can't reconcile this with not having anyone left alive to invite to my wedding.
Lots of funerals during my teenage years.
Of course all the old people died - as a kid, I was allowed to become attached to grandparents, great-aunts and great-uncles, and of course none of them lived to see me graduate high school.
But also there were "early" deaths - people don't expect to die in their 40s and 50s, but it happens.
A lot.
My memories are clouded by grief. I see my grandfather smiling in photographs and I simply can't remember him except as he was after he lost his wife and his sisters. I remember lots of grief. I missed all the good times - I see in the photographs that there were good times, but they waited until they were through living to have me join them.
It makes me angry because I remember having this huge family when I was a kid - I remember crowded Thanksgiving dinners, and I simply can't reconcile this with not having anyone left alive to invite to my wedding.