Fork, you're a father now. Maybe you didn't plan on it, but you are and that entails certain responsibilities. Man up. Or fork up. Whatever.

-via Nag on the Lake | Photo: unknown

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I guess that's not saying much. Jamie is still in diapers, but he's already playing well. I'll arm wrestle the tyke to prop up my ego.

-via Blame It on the Voices

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Lydia's three-year-old daughter names her toys. And some of the names are just not safe. From Rants from Mommyland. Warning: adult language in text. Link (via Buzzfeed)

A Facebook friend of mine who recently became a father wrote "Oh, so that's what a poop explosion is." He didn't have to go into any detail. All parents know exactly what he experienced. Part of parenthood is caring for a creature that can excrete twice its own body weight daily, sometimes all at once.

Poop explosions can get ugly -- and smelly. And apparently bad enough to take down a jetliner in Australia:

Qantas Flight 825 was forced to land at Mount Isa on Sunday after passengers and crew complained of a "strange smell" wafting from the front of the cabin.
But a commenter on the Aviation Herald website, calling himself "Frank Smith," revealed the culprit.

"Unfortunately the fumes turned out to be a very smelly nappy [diaper] dumped in the forward toilet," he said.

"Procedures dictate to land as soon as possible. [It's] very embarrassing for us all at [Qantas], but, better safe than sorry."

Link -via Dave Barry | Photo: Flickr user ewen and donabel

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The band OK Go is known more for its clever music videos than its music. The group is especially fond of stop-motion animation. In this video made exclusively for Sesame Street, the band members are globs of human paint explaining the concept of primary colors.

-via Geekosystem

Amy Morrison runs the funny and informative blog Pregnant Chicken. A search term inspired her to provide a new and needed service.

Every so often I notice that someone has found this site by searching "Pregnant Woman Porn" and I have no doubt that I am not what they are looking for. But it got me to thinking, pregnant ladies *should* have their very own candy to look at. We have needs! We have desires!

Oh, there's more -and if you're pregnant (or have been before), you'll find at least one that hits home. http://www.pregnantchicken.com/pregnant-chicken-blog/2012/1/17/porn-for-pregnant-ladies.html -via Metafilter

I know we focus a lot more on babies, but for those of you with slightly older geeks-in-training, let me suggest the Dark Horse Hell Boy camp for your child's summer activities. Your youngsters can enjoy:

• martial arts and self-defense specific to praeternatural entities


• hand to hand weaponry (foam swords, bows and more)


• investigation and forensics


• folklore & mythology


• potion and charms 101


• telepathy training


• gadgets of the occult: EMF detectors, polarized lenses and other paranormal investigative gear

The week-long experience will cost you $292 for kids 9-10 and $398 for those 11-17.

Link  Via The Mary Sue

These lamps by the design house CrousCalogero will be the balloons on your child's ceiling that never deflate. They come in wall and ceiling models and fit into standard electrical outlets.

Link | Studio Website

The Make-A-Wish Foundation well all-out for its one thousandth wish, granted to 12-year old David Morasco of Epping, New Hampshire. David wanted a castle, so the Foundation built a stone and wooden fantasy castle measuring 24 feet by 24 feet. Watch a video at the link of David exploring it with his friends and classmates.

Link -via GeekDad | Image: WMUR

At eighteen months old, this boy is more badass than you and I ever will be:

Israel’s Ynet news reports that the 18-month-old’s mother from Shfaram in Northern Israel came into her son's room and found him chewing on the dead Asian Racer. (Hemorrhois Nummifer / coinmarked snake)

Ynet interviewed the family and neighbours. When the mother found the child she screamed. A neighbour came to her assistance and pulled the snake out of the boy’s mouth. The neighbour said that she couldn’t believe what she saw.

The thirty-five inch snake wasn't venomous -- not that being otherwise would have deterred the lad.

Link -via Dave Barry | Photo: European Field Herping

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The parents hit a bump while dragging their toddler's sled through the snow. The kid fell off, but the parents didn't notice. Thankfully, the amazingly nonchalant driver did.

-via Blame It on the Voices

To earlier generations of Americans, embroidery samplers were demonstrations of unmarried women's sewing skills to prospective suitors. This one, created in 1807 by a young girl in New Jersey named Mary Antrim, recently sold at auction for a whopping $1.07 million.

News Story and Auction House Listing -via The Mary Sue | Photo: Sotheby's

It's rare for someone to become more helpless as they get older, but for Princesses Peach and Zelda, that's exactly what happened. While they might not be great role models as they age, their younger versions, are certainly adorable and now your little one can cosplay as the lovely Princess Zelda thanks to Etsy seller LeenGreenBean's lovely crocheted costume.

Link Via Kotaku

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Until I saw this video, I was about 90% certain that my own youngling is completely human and not a participant in the robot conspiracy to overthrow and enslave the human race. But Hollywood effects artist kitanimboy shows how deceptive the metal ones can be.

-via Gizmodo

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They drive you insane, but you can't get enough of them. Kid, wait until you discover girls. You're going to experience this feeling on a grander scale.

-via That's Nerdalicious!