The Things That Hide Behind The Words “I Can’t”

We often say “I can’t”, but behind these two words are various meanings. When we say “I can’t”, we have to ask ourselves, “why can’t I do it?” That is where the true meaning of what we have just said comes to light.

With a toddler in the house, it gets easier to hear all the shades of meaning that can hide behind two words. “I can’t” might actually mean “I don’t want to,” “I’m afraid,” “I’m confused,” or even “I don’t know how.”

Having to parse out hidden meanings of these words for a hundredth time, Amanda Baker finally understood why her childhood gymnastics coach banned the phrase on the gym.

Anyone who used it, even the other coaches, had to do 50 push-ups before trying conversation again. It wasn’t that he wanted people to do things beyond their skill or safety level. The policy was against the words themselves. He felt they were a shield to hide behind instead of admitting more useful – and actionable – hesitations. “I’m afraid.” “I’ve never done it by myself.” “I need to rest a few minutes before I try.” “I’m embarrassed to try in front of other people.” “I don’t want to, because…”
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But letting ourselves fall back on the “I can’t” can do more damage than just hiding our deeper feelings.

Check out the full article over at Scientific American.

What makes you say, “I can’t”?

(Image Credit: mohamed_hassan/ Pixabay)


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"I can't" is for when you physically or mentally can not do something. I can't run a marathon. I can't do quadradic equations in my head. I'm not afraid or confused. I just am not able to do somethings.
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