The worst part about drinking red wine is the way it stains your teeth and lips, and nothing ruins a good buzz like people staring at you because you've got a serious case of wine mouth.
You could use a straw, but if sipping wine through a straw ain't classy enough for you then you need some Wino Sippers, the wine glasses shaped like a pipe.
Wino Sippers let you slurp down the vino without staining your teeth, and they make you look more respectable than those barbaric folks who use a straw to drink wine out of a plastic cup. Can you even imagine?
To be honest, Wino Sippers are just Port Sipper Glasses in a swanky package, but the package gives you permission to drink any kind of wine out of them, so they're far more useful than a glass reserved for Port.
Besides, I prefer to drink Port straight out of the bottle...