NEW FEATURE: VOTE & EARN NEATOPOINTS!
Submit your own Neatorama post and vote for others' posts to earn NeatoPoints that you can redeem for T-shirts, hoodies and more over at the NeatoShop!


The Lady and the Bug

An entomological adventure tale
by Stephen Drew, AIR staff

NEWS ITEM: “An Israeli woman swallowed a cockroach and then a fork she used to try to remove the insect from her throat. The winged cockroach jumped into the 32-year-old woman’s mouth as she was cleaning her home in a village in northern Israel this week… [a] surgeon at the Poria Hospital in Tiberias, on the Sea of Galilee, removed the fork with laparoscopic surgery, a minimally invasive procedure performed through a tiny incision on the patient’s abdomen.”
— from a wire service report by the Associated Press, July 10, 2003

There was a young woman who swallowed a roach.
No one knows why she swallowed the roach.

There was a young woman who swallowed a fork
That wriggled and jiggled when she applied torque.
She swallowed the fork to fish out a roach.
No one knows why she swallowed the roach.

There was an incision into a gal’s tummy
Occasioned by something that made her feel crummy.
She felt bad because she had swallowed a fork.
She swallowed the fork to fish out a roach.
No one knows why she swallowed the roach.

There was a winged cockroach who had some adventures
That started when he flew through some woman’s dentures,
And ended with him dissolved in gastric juice —
The doctors came too late to set the roach loose.
The doctors arrived when the woman felt crummy.
They drilled through her tummy to fish out a fork.
She swallowed the fork to fish out a roach.
No one knows why she swallowed the roach.

And no one knows what to make of these affairs,
And nobody really much cares.

BONUS: The traditional song "There was an old lady who swallowed a fly"

(YouTube link)

_____________________

The article above is republished with permission from the July-August 2003 issue of the Annals of Improbable Research. You can download or purchase back issues of the magazine, or subscribe to receive future issues. Or get a subscription for someone as a gift!

Visit their website for more research that makes people LAUGH and then THINK.


Login to comment.




Email This Post to a Friend
"The Lady and the Bug"

Separate multiple emails with a comma. Limit 5.

 

Success! Your email has been sent!

close window

This website uses cookies.

This website uses cookies to improve user experience. By using this website you consent to all cookies in accordance with our Privacy Policy.

I agree
 
Learn More