This German-language video appears to show an ingenious solution to bicycle theft. The lock wraps around a lamp post. Attach the bicycle to it, and then the user activates a remote-controlled motor. The lock climbs up the lamp post.
via DVICE | Company Website
I want to add that there's no plan to sell this,it would be to insecure (and like you already mentioned, what would happen if someone parks under your bike?).
But you can build it, the components and construction manual are online (http://www.conrad.de/ce/de/content/ti_fahrradschloss/ti_fahrradschloss). Perhaps a expensive but unusual idea for christmas ;)
And by 'lock', I mean, something that just vaporizes the thieves that's triggered by car alarm remote?
Seems way cheaper than this.