Shakespeare Schmakespeare. The YouTube Insult Generator, the brainchild of Adrian Holovaty, farts in the the general direction of the Shakespeare Insult Kit (sorry, John!)

Wired explains:

The simple tool, created by EveryBlock founder Adrian Holovaty, is a search engine that takes a term, then uses the YouTube API to find videos relevant to that term and grabs the latest 50 comments. From those 50 search results, the generator finds the ones that start with a number followed by terms such as “people,” “nincompoops” or “youtubers” (key aspects of quality comments), then replaces the number and the word “people” with the word “you.”

So far, Holovaty’s act of “poor man’s data mining,” which he said took about 45 minutes to build, only finds comments about 50 percent of the time. But some of its findings are pretty good (try “Tom Cruise,” “Michael Jackson” or even “Wired” — the results are amusing, but a little too blue to republish here).

The results for "Neatorama" insults are oddly amusing. Apparently, we are peace-, peanut butter jelly-, and penguin-hating vegetarians and tooth-fairy non-believers who fell off our unicycle and broke our bagpipes and jumped whenever a toy Xylophone is played. Oh, and we bred a pitty with a cat (huh?) and didn't get chicks. LOL!

Link

What insults did the YouTube Insult Generator create for you?

Save yourself from boring ol' lorem ipsum placeholder text with this: Samuel L. Ipsum by Paul Maloney. Shown (and linked) is the "gentler" version of the generator, without the trademark Samuel L. Jackson M-word: Link - via Pharyngula

Previously on Neatorama: Hipster Lorem Ipsum | Bacon Ipsum

Who needs a generator when you’ve got the Nissan Leaf, an 100% electric car that can power your house for 2 days via the “Leaf-to-home” system, a converter that attaches to your home’s electric panel and allows for the car’s lithium-ion battery to provide power when it may be otherwise unavailable.With the people of Japan still recovering from the recent disasters, Nissan feels that a symbiotic relationship between electric car and home may be just the thing to keep the lights on when everything else around you is falling to pieces. Link -via PopSci Image via Tom Rafferty at Wikimedia

(YouTube link)

Many children around the world don’t have electricity but they do play soccer. The soccket is a soccer ball that captures energy with every kick. Fifteen minutes of play produces three hours of light.

The sOccket harnesses the kinetic (motion) energy of the soccer ball during normal game play and stores it for later power needs. After play, an LED lamp can be plugged into the sOccket to provide light for reading and other activities normally impossible after dark.

It’s a clean, portable generator that can provide light to families in need around the world. Four Harvard students created this project for the American Express-sponsored Take Part program.

Link – Via John Gushue … Dot Dot Dot

Zazzle has a generator in which you can create custom pet cartoons that look like yours, or like a pet you’d rather have. The cats you see here are mine: Biscuit, Savannah, Marshmallow, and Gogo, although they aren’t to scale. You can also customize a dog, fish, reptiles, birds, and some others. Link

"Neatorama"

Say hello to “Neatorama.”  (To the left.)

At Turn Your Name Into a Face dotcom users are invited to submit their name to the site. With the click of a button it will generate an 8 bit facial depiction based on “your name.”

But let’s face it; the real fun comes from submitting your buddy’s name or that of “Mickey Mouse” only to get this beautiful mug staring back at you:

Link

Look, something’s wrong with Neatorama! Not to worry, that’s just the Hurrdurr version. You can make any website look like this by going through HURRDURR.IT, new from the folks at Urlesque, which is going by the name Hurrlesque today. Link

Now this is strange. When you write on word processing software, online or not, you can justify, align left, align right, or center your text. But why center your text when you can centaur it? That’s exactly what this generator does. Paste in your block of text -you have to paste a lot of words, so you may have to repeat yourself to see how it works- and then his the centaur button at the bottom. Voila! Your text is then centaured correctly! Link -via The Daily What

FAO Schwarz has a Muppet Workshop, where you can have your own “Muppet Whatnot” created just for you. You can design yours online with this generator. I made this one; others have designed Whatnots that look like Charlie Sheen, Bill Clinton, and others. Having it actually made into a Muppet will cost you $129.99. Link -via reddit

The New York Zoo and Aquarium has a generator in which you can design yourself as a fantastic wild animal! On the left is my basic although deceptively youthful self, and on the right I have Fennec fox ears, giant tree frog arms, pintail duck legs, and a ring-tailed lemur tail. There are lots of different animal limbs and features to select from for your personal wild self. Link -via Everlasting Blort

They call me Mister Neatorama!

Which movie was this quote from?

This toy from the Surrealist is a movie quiz in that you are challenged to recall what movie the quote is from. But the quote is not quite the same, because it’s also a generator that will insert words of your choice into those quotes. Have fun with the Movie Quote Generator Quiz either way! Link -via the Presurfer

This is kinda cute! Click the zombies in the Zombie Tabernacle Choir to make them sing their little heads off, sweetly, yet a little bit creepily. Link -Thanks, John Schnall!

The Alcowebizer is a generator that simulates what a website would look like if you were under the influence of alcohol. Enter the address of a website, then you can adjust the look according to your blood-alcohol level. At the first level, Neatorama just looks like it has a few typos -which is not at all surprising. Set it further along, and colors and strange fonts appear. The screenshot here (of this post) is only about half as far as you can take the Alcowebizer. Beware -if you set it far enough, there will be music. Link -via Nag on the Lake

Isle of tune is a music sequencer that’s as visual as it is aural. You build a virtual roadway and line it with objects that make sounds as your cars drive past them. It could be fun to build, but I never got past watching the landscapes that others have built. They can be quite hypnotic! Link -Thanks Jim Hall!

Tagxedo is an application that generates tag clouds in a variety of shapes, colors, and styles for your blog, Twitter feed, or other website. You can embed a dynamic cloud or just play around with the art, like I did. This cat was created with data gleaned from Neatorama, as you probably guessed. Link -via Nag on the Lake

You don’t have to do any artwork yourself with this zombie generator -just upload your picture and it will turn you into a zombie! Well, at least your picture. This one is me, zombified. Link -via the Presurfer

Watch me do the Ugly Dance! Click around at the bottom to make it look even sillier. This generator is a promotion from the Swedish band Fulkultur. It worked; I can’t get their song out of my head now. You can upload your picture and make yourself dance. Link -via the Presurfer

FlowerPower is a simple drawing application that strews flowers all about -but you control where. My kids will love this! Link -via mental_floss.

If you love Twitter or you love the people you follow on Twitter, you can buy a coffee mug made with your Twitter friends’ profile pictures on it! What else is neat is that you don’t have to buy one to generate a picture. This one has my contacts on it. Link -via the Presurfer

Turn your handwriting into a font! Pilot Pens asks you to use your ink pen at least once more to write out your letters, then feed them into their font generator. Download your personal font, and then you can type with your own handwriting! Link -via Core77 -Thanks, Senor Mysterioso!

Turn yourself (or anyone you have a picture of) into a Na’vi character from the movie Avatar with the Avatarize Yourself generator! Disregard the part where it says “only in cinemas”, since the movie is no longer in cinemas, but on home video. Link -via the Presurfer

Make Any Webpage Look Like It Was Made By A 13 Year-Old In 1996

Link -via Metafilter

You don’t have to have a printer to make your own envelops, but if you do, you can print a Map Envelope! Enter your location, print out and fold, and your envelope will have a Google Maps image of the place the enclosed letter (or whatever) originated on its inside. You can even add a message for a little something extra for your recipient. Link -via the Presurfer

This application will give you a lesson in how difficult it is to control the universe. Select how many planets you want and adjust their orbits and other parameters. Then set it in motion and watch your planets crash into each other or fly off into deep space. At least that’s what happened to mine! With some practice, you might get a real system going. Link -via J-Walk Blog

Create a romance novel cover with your picture on it with Romance Novel Yourself. Check out the presentation of my book, then make your own from one of several different covers! Link -via the Generator Blog

Almost every site I’ve visited today seems to have a collaborative drawing board going at Flockdraw. So I got a new one for Neatorama readers to draw on. Let’s see what you can do! Link -via J-Walk Blog

Update: Thanks to commenter sjberry for the screenshot from this morning! See the comments for more saved images.

Anyone who takes digital pictures gets a real kick out of how crime investigators on the CSI TV shows use their computers to zoom in and enhance photographs, as if you could really zoom in to just a few pixels and see a legible image. Now you can! The CSI Image Enhancer lets you zoom in on a photograph just by typing furiously and saying “enhance!” Well, really, all you have to do is type furiously. Try this one as an example. Upload your own photos to make a personal enhancement of your own. Link -via b3ta

(image found at Arbroath)

Click on the raindrops to make a melody, which will loop for you in this interactive page from Lullatune. Click the green clock for a metronome if you like. I managed to make a pleasant tune and played it for quite some time while I surfed the ‘net. Link -via Arbroath

Personas is a component of the Metropath(ologies) exhibit, currently on display at the MIT Museum by the Sociable Media Group from the MIT Media Lab. It uses sophisticated natural language processing and the Internet to create a data portrait of one’s aggregated online identity. In short, Personas shows you how the Internet sees you.

I was surprised to see I had more “sports” in my profile than anything else -must’ve been the Olympics. And it’s nice that my “legal” was bigger than my “illegal”! But the most interesting part was seeing all those things people said about me while it was processing. The one that stands out was “Your inquiry ‘Miss Cellania is an idiot’ did not return any results.” Ha! (Of course, now that I’ve written it out, there will be results for that query.) Try your own name and puzzle over the results. Link -via the Presurfer

The "cheeky squirrel," originally posted at National Geographic and made famous by Neatorama’s own Upcoming Queue, has now gone viral on the internet.

Hundreds of photos, including many famous ones, have been modified by adding the ground squirrel.  Now you can do so with your own photo or one of your favorites from the web.

The simplest generator I’ve encountered is "The Squirrelizer." You cannot, however, upload an image from your computer; you will need to
use one that has a url (stored somewhere on a blog or in an
image library such as Imageshack).

After that, the generator is intuitive. If you don’t have an online account where you can store the image, just take a screen shot of your creation.

Link – via lutralutra

From the Upcoming ueue, submitted by Minnesotastan.

Wow – Neatorama made it to the TV show Who Wants to be a Millionaire … wait a minute … HEY! Actually, it’s a rather clever generator by Remixito, where you can generate your own set of question and answers: Link – via MRod

The embedded flash is autoplay, so I put the finished product on the next page.