Got an embarassing drunk photo of yourself posted on Facebook? You're in good company:

On average, adult users of the social networking website said they were under the influence of alcohol in 76 per cent of the pictures in which they were "tagged".

With Christmas party season in full swing, more than half of those surveyed said that there were photographs of them on Facebook they would not want colleagues or employers to see, and 8 per cent admitted to appearing in pictures that could get them into "serious trouble" at work.

Despite such fears fears for their own image online, the poll also found that two thirds of Britons had intentionally tagged friends in embarrassing photos so other friends would be alerted.

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Alcohol makes you do stupid thing, and by "you" I also mean Swedish elk. Here's what happened:

A homeowner in southern Sweden got a shock when he found a drunken elk stuck in his neighbour's apple tree.

The animal was apparently on the hunt for fermenting apples when she lost her balance and became trapped in the tree.

Per Johansson, from Saro near Gothenburg, found the elk making a roaring noise in the garden next door.

He called the emergency services, who helped him free the boozed-up beast by sawing off branches. She spent the night recovering in the garden.

The next day she took herself off into the woods with her hangover.

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A witness videotaped the chase and then posted it to YouTube. He and his roommate had stopped for gas on University Drive when they saw the forklift go by.

Nathan Lowery said he was stunned as he watched the shirtless suspect raise and lower the forks. It looked like the man was trying to antagonize police, he said.

“When we passed him, the guy was standing up chugging a beer and threw it at the cop car behind him,” Lowery said.

Timothy Raines was eventually arrested on the interstate highway. Link (with videos) -via Arbroath

The distraught man, drifting in his disable craft with a broken tiller near Kalmar off the south coast of Sweden, claimed his wife had drowned after he couldn’t find her on the boat, The Local reports.

Rescuers soon found that the sailor’s wife had never been on the boat and was safe on land.

The boat was towed back to shore, and the drunken man was given a breath test and arrested for boating while intoxicated.

Link | Image

John F. Ptak came across an 1908 newspaper photo essay entitled “The Pleasant Lot of the Inebriate in Captivity: The comfortable quarters of the inmates of a state reformatory for inebriates.”

The life in the state reformatory as an alcoholic British woman was hardly “pleasant” as the title states, though we don’t know what the author was comparing this to.  I suspect it was a general prison that was the benchmark for pleasantness, though perhaps it could have been an insane asylum , assuming of course that they didn’t seem nearly as pleasant as the “pleasant” scenes in these pictures.  The reformatory for alcoholics in Great Britain was established more along the lines of an almshouse or mental institution and seemed not terribly coercive–though given the border decorations for the photos on these pages–keys–there is no doubt that these people were incarcerated “for their own and the community’s good.”

Although the photographs are obviously posed, they are worth a look for their historic value. Link -via Everlasting Blort

Two women got into a drunken argument after a night's drinking at the bar, and decided that the only logical way to find out who's right is to let the police decide:

Troopers said one of the drivers called authorities to report a dispute with another motorist about 8:15 a.m. The driver who called in then decided to drive to the district headquarters, and the other driver followed.

Troopers were waiting in the parking lot to speak to the drivers, according to Trooper Mike Link, a spokesman for the state police. The troopers found the two had been out drinking all night and were under the influence of alcohol.

Link said he isn't sure what the women were arguing about, but it started in a bar and was taken outside. The women didn't know each other, Link said. [...]

"We prefer that people stay off the roads altogether after drinking too much," Capt. Brad Parsons, the district commander for the state police, said in a statement. "But if you decide you don't want to stay off the roads, our second choice would be for you to drive to our headquarters and turn yourself in."

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A drunk man found lying on a frozen park bench in his underwear survived because of the amount of alcohol in his blood.

Aleksander Andrzej, 32, was spotted in the Warsaw park – where the temperature was -5C – and taken to hospital by police, reports Metro.

A breath test showed he had 1,024 micrograms per 100ml, nearly 30 times the legal limit for driving, which doctors say helped him live.

They believe alcohol in his blood acted like anti-freeze …

Link (Photo: Shutterstock)

“A woman walking her dog alerted the police after seeing the bird sitting by the side of the road oblivious to passing traffic,” Frank Otruba, spokesman for the police in the southwestern city of Pforzheim, told SPIEGEL ONLINE.

The Brown Owl didn’t appear to be injured and officers quickly concluded that it had had one too many. One of its eyelids was drooping, adding to the general impression of inebriation.

“It wasn’t staggering around and we didn’t breathalyze it but there were two little bottles of Schapps in the immediate vicinity,” said Otruba. “We took it to a local bird expert who has treated alcoholized birds before and she has been giving it lots of water.”

The owl will be released when sober. Link -via Arbroath

Got the Indian Vapours,
Topsy Turvey,
As Drunk as David’s Sow,
He’s got his Top Gallant Sails out,
Seen the yellow Star,
As Stiff as a Ring-bolt,
The King is his Cousin,
Got Kib’d Heels,
As Dizzy as a Goose,
Had a Kick in the Guts,
Spoke with his Friend,
Cherubimical,
He’s kiss’d black Betty,
He’s had a Thump over the Head with Sampson’s Jawbone

Of course, that’s far from 200. See the rest at mental_floss. Link

Troy Kaczor, 40, told police he shed his shirt and shoes at Big Bull Falls Park in downtown Wausau before he dove into the river, intending to catch the one-legged bird and then roast it, Wausau Police Lt. Bill Kolb said.

Kaczor, who had been drinking heavily before taking the plunge, was unable to escape the clutches of the cold water and was rescued by Wausau firefighters, Kolb said.

The goose, apparently sober and a better swimmer, came to no harm, but was unavailable for comment. Link -via Arbroath

(Unrelated image credit: Flickr user Nita W)

An officer noticed partially empty bottles of vanilla extract, labeled as 35 percent alcohol by volume, and Diet Coke in the front seat, and they said they smelled a strong vanilla odor on the woman’s breath. A grocery receipt found in the vehicle listed two 8-ounce bottles of vanilla extract, purchased Wednesday.

This is Moss’ third DUI arrest. Link

Possums are prone to play dead, especially when threatened. Their eyes glaze over, their teeth are bared, and they secrete a rank stench from their glands.
But the possum lying along the Colonel Drake Highway on Thursday was doing none of that, troopers said. It was long-dead certified roadkill.
And Donald Wolfe was intent on bringing it back to life, troopers said. Trooper Jamie Levier of the Punxsutawney barracks said witnesses saw Wolfe, 55, locking lips with the lifeless marsupial about 3 p.m. in a remote area about 80 miles northeast of Pittsburgh.

Link (Photo not the possum in question)

Hard-headed husband Lin Ma hammered a nail into his own skull after a bust up with his wife over his boozing.

Lin, 66, of Yuyi, southern China, pounded the eight inch nail into his head when wife Su, 60, read him the riot act over a drinking session.

Amazingly, he survived which yet another confirmation that alcohol is good for people with head injury: Link (Photo: europics.at)

Last week, a surveillance video of a drunk guy at a convenience store became quite popular. However, it was almost eleven minutes long and was, well, a store surveillance video. The guys at Mustache and Monocle re-edited it and gave it the silent movie treatment, making it much easier to watch, and just as funny. -via Gorilla Mask

”Come on, I know you’re down there,” he radioed. ”Where the bloody hell have you hidden yourself?”

Control tower staff say he also sang a few songs, cracked a mother-in-law joke and told them to ”pull their fingers out as I’ve got a party to go to”.

Fearing instrument failure, the tower scrambled a rescue helicopter, which homed in on the man in clear-blue skies west of the airport, and gave instructions for the pilot to follow it back.

The unnamed man was able to land the Cessna, and “wobbled” to his car. Airfield authorities called police, who arrested the man on his way home. He tested over four times the legal limit for driving. Link -via Arbroath

(image credit: Flickr user jon gos)

Fun Tuna has a photogallery of people who have passed out while in yoga positions. Presumably by accident.

Link via Bits & Pieces

See what happened: Link [embedded YouTube clip]

Whether they’re on an obstacle course, drunk off fermented pumpkin or just being cute, squirrel videos will get you through a Wednesday. 

– via urlesque

From the Upcoming ueue, submitted by thatguy455.

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