Prombron: The World’s Baddest SUV

By Alex in Auto & Transportation on Oct 20, 2009 at 12:21 am

Move over, Hummer – there’s a new bad boy macho car (or masculine overcompensation, your pick) in town. Behold the Dartz Prombron Monaco Red Diamond Edition armored car, developed by Russian carmaker RussoBaltique. How bad is this bad boy? Let’s just say that it has seats covered with "whale-penis leather":

On its official website, the company says the whale-penis leather is the same as that used by Greek shipping magnate Aristotle Onassis on the yacht Christina O.

Onassis is rumoured to have had some of the barstools on the yacht, the world’s most expensive at the time, covered in the controversial leather.

The leather is not the only tacky accessory on the Prombron, which Dartz claims is the world’s most expensive SUV.

The bulletproof windows are gold-plated, the exhaust is made of tungsten, the gauges are encrusted with diamonds and rubies and the exterior has a Kevlar coating.

The car also comes with three bottles of the world’s most expensive Vodka, RussoBaltique, although the website does warn prospective buyers not to drink and drive.

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  1. BamaChris
    Oct 20th, 2009 at 12:49 am

    This baby gets 12 gallons to the mile.

  2. lansing wedding photographer
    Oct 20th, 2009 at 12:53 am

    i’d rather not sit on a whale’s penis

  3. Zakk?
    Oct 20th, 2009 at 1:31 am

    Looks like it’s made of LEGO…

  4. Tim Giachetti
    Oct 20th, 2009 at 2:07 am

    Do Not rub the seats, arousal will ensue resulting in being ejected from the vehicle.

  5. Skipweasel
    Oct 20th, 2009 at 2:50 am

    Another in Neatorama’s occasional series about how tacky conspicuous consumption is!

    That really is startlingly gross, isn’t it?

  6. OhYes
    Oct 20th, 2009 at 5:51 am

    I don’t care what penis materials are on this or what kind of coating is on the window (this includes penis coating)..with a name like “Prombron” this is NOT a bad ass car.

  7. zavatone
    Oct 20th, 2009 at 7:56 am

    My gold plated windows are covered in DOUBLE whale penis leather.

  8. Tigergulp
    Oct 20th, 2009 at 8:26 am

    (sigh) Whatever happened to buying a Ferrari or a Corvette when you felt inmasculine? or was that for the midlife crisis stage?

  9. Neal
    Oct 20th, 2009 at 8:43 am

    Who will be the first hip-hop / rap celebutard to buy one?

  10. Tim Giachetti
    Oct 20th, 2009 at 10:25 am

    “Imma let you finish in a minute, But Ahab was strapped to the biggest whale penis skin of allll time!”

  11. dutchboy
    Oct 20th, 2009 at 10:31 am

    I heard these are green.

  12. l'elk!
    Oct 20th, 2009 at 1:09 pm

    are you sure this isn’t the onion?

  13. Christophe
    Oct 20th, 2009 at 1:44 pm

    actually penis leather is a rather inexpensive material : just rub it and you got plenty more!

  14. Noelegy
    Oct 20th, 2009 at 2:42 pm

    Neal beat me to it. I was thinking, “Rapper shows up in one of these in 3…2…1.”

  15. Moon
    Oct 21st, 2009 at 4:17 pm

    Instead of making the world’s greatest car with 150 mpg and great 0-60 times and outstanding handling and superior safety, these clowns decided to make the world’s most expensive car by adding diamonds and gold and whale penii to a pretty standard SUV.

    Good job, morons.

  16. Burgundy
    Oct 21st, 2009 at 11:51 pm

    Stay classy, Russian Mafia…


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