Beheaded Teen Witch Gets Proper Funeral…700 Years Later

By Queuebot in Religion on Mar 24, 2009 at 1:07 am

The remains of a 14th century teenager, believed to have been beheaded on charges of witchcraft and buried in unconsecrated ground, has been laid to rest in a proper funeral…700 years after her death.

The girl, named Holly by archaeologists because her remains were found beneath a holly bush, had had her head laid at her side, a sign that she might have been suspected of witchcraft.

Dr Paul Wilkinson, director of the Kent Archaeological Field School, said the decapitation – which it was believed would deny eternal life – meant Holly was ‘shamed’ and was either a teenage witch, a criminal or had committed suicide.

A crowd of more than 200 mourners – who had responded to an appeal to give the suspected witch a respectable funeral – gathered to pay their respects to a teenager whose identity remains a mystery.

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From the Upcoming ueue, submitted by Pirate Jenny.


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  1. Polx
    Mar 24th, 2009 at 6:34 am

    this was all part of her diabolical plan.

  2. D Bozko
    Mar 24th, 2009 at 6:55 am

    So 700 year old English skeletal remains get a proper burial but 700 year old third world skeletal remains go on display at the British Museum?

  3. Evilbeagle
    Mar 24th, 2009 at 7:03 am

    I think she would have been better off on display. But then, I am a huge archaeology buff.

  4. Gauldar
    Mar 24th, 2009 at 8:23 am

    I say we clone her so she can have her vengeance.

  5. Johnny Cat
    Mar 24th, 2009 at 10:18 am

    “She turned me into a newt!”

  6. Gordon Wagner
    Mar 24th, 2009 at 12:10 pm

    This was a horrid crime against a woman — did she REALLY turn you into a newt, or would she not submit to whatever male will determined that she was a witch and had to DIE for being a witch?

    She was probably normal and did not want to submit to whatever misery the powers at that time had in mind for her.

    A witch. A crime against women is more like it.

  7. Skipweasel
    Mar 24th, 2009 at 3:09 pm

    Perhaps she just had a very serious shaving accident?

  8. Evilbeagle
    Mar 24th, 2009 at 6:57 pm

    Gordon… you are assuming that only women were killed for being “witches” or “heretics” I would say it is a horrid crime against a human being.

  9. Johnny Cat
    Mar 24th, 2009 at 8:19 pm

    Gordon:

    “Well, I got better.”

  10. ted
    Mar 24th, 2009 at 9:44 pm

    I dunno, JohnnyCat. Are you sure there’s not a little newt still left in you?

    They named her Holly after the bush they found her under? Good thing they didn’t find her under some St John’s Wort.

    To assume she was a witch is just fanciful guesswork. Seems like they’re using her body to further their own interests – like Gordon Wagner’s rant.

  11. Johnny Cat
    Mar 25th, 2009 at 12:08 am

    Maybe we’ll see if there’s any newt left in me in 2012. I doubt it, though.

  12. Evilbeagle
    Mar 25th, 2009 at 3:54 am

    To be fair, ted, while I would have to agree that they are making a big deal out of this find in order to further their own interests, the form of burial does suggest that this woman was scarin’ the bejesus out of someone.

  13. Video Game Dork
    Mar 25th, 2009 at 5:06 pm

    This was the rejected original series finale of that Sabrina show.

  14. Monster Girl
    Apr 4th, 2009 at 4:06 pm

    idk, this sounds like that vampire they found not long ago. sad for the girl tho. it would be awesome if she came back to get her revenge. it would show all those ppl right!!


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