The Reports of Life on Mars are Greatly Exaggerated

By Alex in Science & Tech on Aug 4, 2008 at 2:30 pm

A few days ago, Craig Covault wrote an article for Aviation Week claiming that the Mars Phoenix lander didn’t just find ice – it had discovered "potential for life" on Mars and that the White House was briefed about it:

"They have discovered water on Mars for the third or fourth time," one senior Mars scientists joked about the hubbub around the water ice announcement.

The other data not discussed openly yet are far more "provocative," Phoenix officials say.

In fact, the Jet Propulsion Laboratory science team for the MECA wet-chemistry instrument that made the findings was kept out of a July 31 news conference at the University of Arizona Phoenix control center. The goal was to prevent them from being asked any questions that could reveal information before NASA is ready to make an announcement, sources say.

The Bush Administration’s Presidential Science Advisor’s office, however, has been briefed on the new information that NASA hopes to release as early as mid August. It is possible an announcement would not come until September, to allow for additional analysis. That will depend upon the latest results still being analyzed from the spacecraft’s organic oven and soil chemistry laboratories. (SourceThanks Geekazoid!)

The news was picked up by Slashdot and the blogosphere was propelled into a tizzy, despite NASA and the White House’s quick denial of the rumor.

So, let’s play a fun guessing game. What do you think the "provocative" news is all about?


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  1. Nicholas_Smicholas
    Aug 4th, 2008 at 2:42 pm

    That oil was also discovered on mars and they want to lift the ban on off planet drilling.

  2. xadrian
    Aug 4th, 2008 at 3:03 pm

    All it takes is one fossil and one drop of water and suddenly small towns in the midwest and south start tearing themselves apart.

    Figuratively.

    I think it’ll be some chemical component that while “provocative” to the scientific community will seem kind of pale to regular work-a-day Joes.

  3. sickb*stard
    Aug 4th, 2008 at 4:13 pm

    They discovered chocolate on mars.

  4. JenDiggity
    Aug 4th, 2008 at 4:19 pm

    My first internet experience was watching “live” video of the first Mars rover years ago. It also was the first time I heard Sublime, not that it matters or is related in any other way than I really remember that day vividly. I have no idea what they’ve found, but I’m very anxious to find out! I wish more people were as excited as I am.

  5. Brother Bill
    Aug 4th, 2008 at 5:08 pm

    Jimmy Hoffa.

  6. artbot
    Aug 4th, 2008 at 5:18 pm

    “What do you think the “provocative” news is all about?”

    That the Bush administration has a “science team”.

  7. Geekazoid
    Aug 4th, 2008 at 5:26 pm

    I’ll have to agree with xadrian, probably something the scientists and geeks will get excited about, but the rest of us nothing really spectacular. Probably some chemical component and the like.

  8. shecky
    Aug 4th, 2008 at 7:31 pm

    Maybe they were just trying to tactfully tell the President that his fly was open.

  9. SenorMysterioso
    Aug 4th, 2008 at 8:56 pm

    Once again we have boiled poor microscopic Martians alive.

  10. sticknick
    Aug 4th, 2008 at 10:05 pm

    Bush finally found Osama Bin Laden (and is going to give no credit to the Phoenix lander).

  11. Johnny Cat
    Aug 4th, 2008 at 10:35 pm

    U of A in Phoenix? Now that’s provocative.

  12. terry
    Aug 4th, 2008 at 10:35 pm

    they found a bra with 3 dd cups!

  13. JC
    Aug 4th, 2008 at 10:45 pm

    Maybe Bin Laden is hiding there. Who knows?

  14. maps
    Aug 5th, 2008 at 2:40 am

    i read that it was a compound or some such that makes life impossible

  15. Warenwirtschaft
    Aug 5th, 2008 at 2:48 am

    That sounds really interesting, and I can’t await the news. Perhaps they’ve found life on mars, perhaps not. It could be nearly everything. Hopefully there are more news soon.

  16. JamesM
    Aug 5th, 2008 at 4:33 am

    The news was that they found oxidizing compounds. The planet is basically one giant source of rocket fuel.

  17. Jonathan
    Aug 5th, 2008 at 7:12 am

    They found a Sonics with a drive thru, I’ve seen commercials in my area for 4 yrs and we still don’t have one.

  18. Knothead
    Aug 5th, 2008 at 9:44 am

    Obama’s qualifications to be prez? They would be microscopic and rather difficult to prove due to the complete lack of evidence, however.

  19. mkultra
    Aug 5th, 2008 at 4:43 pm

    Bush sr. was desperate to have a manned exploration team go to Mars when he was prez, but it was too expensive. It seems Mars exploration is yet another way he is living his dreams through George W.
    George Bush Sr. knows that there are non-natural artifacts on Mars (and the moon btw), but for some reason is determined not to let the public know.
    OK, go ahead, let the ridicule begin! People can’t stand the idea that someone may have been there millenia ago. Even atheists and hipsters who claim to scoff at religious fundamentalism are all too quick to deny the possibility.
    Water on Mars = life (at some point at least) on Mars.

  20. Knut Holt
    Aug 12th, 2008 at 3:50 am

    It has allways pussled me why the official objectives of the explorations allways are made so limited, finding water, measuring temperature, measuring chemical compositions, etc.

    It seems to me that something is deliberately hided by officially setting so limited objectives.


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