From the same folks that did the Dharma Initiative Rations featured on Neatorama way back when, here is the Bureau of Communication's web forms you can email:
Geeky Science Valentines | Scientist Valentines
The Bureau of Communication has a collection of old-fashioned and very official-looking forms for all the mundane bits of communication in life.
Whether you wish formally apologize, air a grievance or simply acknowledge a holiday, they have a card to match your sentiment.
The new "Declaration of Romantic Intent" form is ready just in time for valentines day. Perfect for when you ought to express your attraction in the most clinical way fashionable, without all the treacly hugs and kisses of most valentines day greetings.