He can type 100 insults per minute, troll people with one hand buried deep in a bag of cheese curls and make needless corrections with his eyes closed. He's the Keyboard Warrior, and his snarky comments are all the ammo he needs to wage a one man war against those who dare to listen to him online. Who can stop this chucklehead from leaving a bad impression on the entire internet? Perhaps nature will find a way...
Celebrate the internet's most despised basement dwellers with this Keyboard Warrior t-shirt by Bomdesignz, it's the perfect way to poke fun at the trolls who are only mighty heroes in their own minds!
There are very few ways to qualify someone before you mug them, but thieves often prefer to rob women because they're assumed to be easy targets, an assumption that is often proven to be wrong.
MMA fighter Monique Bastos was headed to the gym with a few friends when a stupid thief tried to steal her phone while riding by on a bike. However, Monique wasn't going to give up her phone without a fight, and the would-be thief ended up with nothing but a hard hitting life lesson.
As you can see in the video, the thief she has locked up in the dreaded "triangle" wished he was dead, and his punishment definitely fit his cowardly crime. Curious about what he's yelling as she chokes him out? Read a translation here
H.P. Lovecraft keeps getting name-checked in pop culture. Here's why he matters.
(Image credit: Rafal Badan for Pardes publishing house)
Howard Phillips Lovecraft was having a bad summer. Like many newcomers to New York City, the aspiring writer from Rhode Island felt overwhelmed and out of place. He was unemployed, living in a mouse-infested one-room apartment in Brooklyn, and steadily losing weight on a paltry diet of cold canned beans and spaghetti. To make matters worse, his wife, for whom he’d moved to New York in the first place, had taken a job in another city and left him to fend for himself.
It was the first time Lovecraft had ever lived alone— and he was spectacularly homesick. Born in Providence in 1890, he viewed his hometown—with its scholarly atmosphere and dilapidated 18th-century mansions—as an essential piece of his identity. “Providence is me—I am Providence,” he wrote his aunt from his New York exile, inspiring the title of S. T. Joshi’s authoritative biography, I Am Providence: The Life and Times of H.P. Lovecraft. The city suited Lovecraft—a self-taught antiquarian obsessed with the contrasts of New England—in ways that New York could not.
Lovecraft grew up with a neurotic and stifling mother, Susie, and two aunts. (His father had died, probably of syphilis, after a stint in a mental institution.) The family had little of the capital but all the prejudices associated with old New England pedigree, and Lovecraft was never trained for any gainful employment. Nervous illnesses kept him isolated at home for long stretches, during which he joined up with “amateur journalist” groups: organizations of unpaid pamphleteers who—with their in-fighting, trolling, and political ranting that no one would ever hear—would likely feel at home in online forums today.
It was at a convention for such writers in Boston in 1921 that Lovecraft met Sonia Haft Greene, an energetic and attractive Eastern European Jewish widow from New York City, seven years his senior. Lovecraft, still reeling from the death of his mother six weeks prior, was not exactly a catch. He had no income besides a dwindling family inheritance and occasional checks from editorial temp work. He had the frame of a scarecrow, a protruding lower jaw, and a squeaky voice. He was also averse to sex, which he blamed on having read a scientific book as a child. “The whole matter was reduced to prosaic mechanism,” he wrote later, “a mechanism which I rather despised.” Not to mention, he was a virulent racial purist, outwardly disgusted by immigrants, tending to become “livid with anger” when he encountered foreign workers.
Jess Bauer, the Australian teen behind the popular YouTube account Bauerbirds, created a series called "When Mama Isn't Home," which stars her father and brother making musical mischief in the kitchen. The latest clip in the series is called "When Leia Isn't Home," a peppy little Cantina Band number.
Earlier videos in the series are shown below. I hope mama doesn't come home to a broken oven door, or the series could be headed for an abrupt and bitter end! Via Laughing Squid
The bunnies residing with Japanese twitter user @evo3183 come with a dangerously high level of cuteness. The threat they pose is massively exacerbated by the floral crowns and fairy costumes that they wear while sitting for the photographer.
Their names are Potato, Kurumi, Marron, and Koishi. Remember those names as you look into their eyes and feel their adorableness seared into your retinas.
Some people would see having a toy named after them as a good thing, but one foxy Fox News host wasn't very happy when she discovered a toy hamster with her unusual name.
Host Harris Faulkner is suing Hasbro for giving a Littlest Pet Shop hamster her name and likeness, and while the likeness element of the lawsuit is up for debate it’s hard to deny Hasbro’s use of her far from normal name.
Harris is suing the toy company for 5 million dollars, claiming the toy stole her likeness via “complexion, the shape of its eyes, and the design of its eye makeup”.
She's probably just angry that the figure named after her is a sidekick and not the main character, no word yet on whether a human named Benson Detwyler plans to sue Hasbro as well.
They are terrifying scenarios: you're on a first date. You're in a live theater performance. You're at your mother-in-law's for dinner, and she despises any form of modern technology. These situations require you to be mobile phone free. You may have your friend in your pocket or purse, but that's as close as you're going to get to that pretty, colorful glass screen of All Things Interesting. After a while you're getting antsy. You might even break a sweat. Anxiety is building. Over what? Scaachi Koul for The New Yorker knows:
"Things That Will Happen If I Don’t Take My Phone Out Right Now:
5. Someone will send me an e-mail marked “URGENT” and it will, for once, actually be quite urgent (probably about free food), and I won’t see it until it’s too late (all the free food is gone).
10. I will have to spend at least one second of my life not agonizing over how everyone else’s life seems better. (How are youalways at a cottage? Who drove you there? You don’t have a car and I don’t understand.)
Surely you recognize Lyndon Johnson, the U.S. president from 1963 until 1969. But it’s not him in the picture, it’s a publicity still from an upcoming HBO movie called All the Way. Who is the actor under all that makeup? You might already know, but if you don’t, take a good look, make your best guess, and then jump over to Uproxx for the answer. That's a darn good makeup job.
Okay, see if you recognize the plot of this story. It all takes place in the Death Row section of a prison.
Like in the movie, it's revealed that the prisoner is magic, and he uses his powers to cure the ailments of a guard with whom he has formed an unlikely friendship…
Despite being treated like some sort of criminal or something, the inmate continues helping those within the prison through the magic of making shit glow.
Eventually, everyone recognizes that the inmate has a miraculous gift and should be spared from his impending execution. In order to prove this point, he heals an otherwise incurable condition within one of the warden's family members.
The warden does everything in his power to stop the magic inmate's execution, but it all proves fruitless because, at the end of the day, he still was convicted of murdering people, and the criminal justice system frowns on that.
There are lots of nasty things lurking in the ocean, things that chew people up and cause lots of mysterious disappearances, but the only thing lurking in Crystal Lake is a hockey mask clad psycho named Jason. Still, Jason is way more frightening than any shark or giant squid, because he has only one thing on his mind- murder! He's a curse upon the carefree and ignorant campers who flock to the lake for a bit of fun, and he'll continue to haunt the lake until people learn to keep their jaws shut about Crystal Lake being a great place to go camping!
Horrify and amaze your fellow Friday the 13th fans with this Bottom Of The Lake t-shirt by Ninjaink, it's a great way to gear up for a camping trip to the lake or a horror movie marathon.
The fashion design industry—at least for men—might as well close up shop now. The task of making men look awesome has now been perfected. It’s simple, really: get yourself a man bun. Put a little fedora on it. Then go and nail that job interview or first date.
The Capitol Hill Seattle Blog says that this is new style in the trendier parts of the already trendy Capitol Hill neighborhood. And as Seattle goes, so goes the world.
Bentham’s odd plans for his body’s disposition after his death makes plenty of sense when you learn a little about the man. Learn the story of one of the world’s most famous corpses in this episode of the 100 Wonders series from Atlas Obscura. -Thanks, Dylan!
Coloring for Grown-Ups is a series of fun activity books by Ryan Hunter and Taige Jensen for those of us who are still trying to figure out adulthood. Which is pretty much all of us. It's all of the confusion, anxiety, and regret of growing up with the time-killing activities of children's matching games and coloring pages. The books include painfully realistic valentines and seasonal reminders, such as spending Christmas with your extended family. You can find more sample pages here.
Have you resigned yourself to the fact that you’re the worst dancer in the world? So many people say that, but they don’t know what they’re talking about, because the worst dancer is really me. They say you should dance like no one is watching, but sure as shootin’, you can feel their judgmental eyes upon you. This is the latest from John McNamee at Pie Comic.
In The Lord of the Rings, lembas is a special bread made by elves. It's a compact, nutritious food. When eaten thriftily, a small portion can sustain a person for a long period of time. It won't spoil when wrapped in certain leaves. Consequently, it's the perfect trail ration.
The elves of Lothlórien gave lembas to the Fellowship to help the march through the barren land of Mordor on their way to destroy the One Ring. How much would they have needed for the journey if they ate nothing but lembas? Skye Rosetti and Krisho Manaharan of the University of Leicester published a paper in the Journal of Interdisciplinary Science Topics on the subject. They concluded:
For an ideal journey with all 9 members of the fellowship, using the metabolic rates for each species from , the total calorific consumption of the 92-day journey was found to be 1,780,214.59 kcal. If the elves of Imraldis had provided the Fellowship with lembas, this would equate to them having to carry a total of 675 pieces, or 75 pieces each. For the different species, this equates to 304 for the hobbits, 214 for Gandalf, Aragorn and Boromir; 99 for Gimli and 60 for Legolas.
Filmmaker Torill Kove tells a wonderful story about her grandmother's life and work in Oslo during World War II. Some parts of it are even true!
Sharp and whimsical, her story combines her grandmother's tales with historical events and fantasy, showing how a cherished anecdote can come to acquire a mythical status. King Harald of Norway said, "I love the irony of this short."
No parent sets out with the goal of lying to their kids. But many would probably agree that a well-placed white lie on occasion helps them to keep their sanity. And sanity is a good thing to hang on to when you're a parent.
When Redditors began sharing the lies that they've told their children on this thread, it quickly filled up with funny. Shown here are a few of the responses; check the link to see them all. Have you told your children any lies similar to these? Or do you remember those told to you by your parents? Share them, if you're so inclined, in the comments. Via 22 Words
The auction website eBay launched on September 3, 1995. It’s hard the believe the auction site has been around that long, but there was a time I bought used Disney movies on VHS through the site, so it must be so. Some auctions fetch more attention than others. Do you recall these?
A suit of armor for a guinea pig fetched $1,150 in 2013. The creator promised that the tiny hand-made suit (and matching helmet) would keep a “guinea pig protected and secure in all situations.”
Former Toronto Mayor Rob Ford’s tie, which he wore when he confessed to smoking crack at a 2013 news conference, sold for $1,445 in 2015. The so-called “crack tie” featured logos of several NFL teams.
When the pen and paper version of Final Fantasy hit the store shelves people weren't too impressed with the conversion, but along came an expansion book that got everyone on board the FF train. It was called "Airships & Summons", and it contained the rules for building mighty airships to pilot around the clouds over Gaia as well as how to summon elemental forces to do your bidding. The book took the game to a whole new level, making the video games seem so limited in comparison, but there would always be those who lacked the imagination necessary to bring Gaia to life in their minds...
Bring a sense of roleplaying adventure to your geeky wardrobe with this Airships & Summons t-shirt by Coinbox Tees, it's an easy way to show the world you've got game!
It was 3 AM. Robert Wright of Fresno, California was barbecuing a slab of pork ribs. Then the apartment next to his caught on fire. Wright got his wife and children outside, safe from the flames. Then he went back in to rescue the helpless ribs that otherwise would have been lost, if not for his courage. 9 News reports:
The only thing I think first is ‘make sure them ribs is right’ and ran over and got my family man,” Mr Wright said, in the interview that is now going viral.
He managed to get his wife and children out of the house, along with the ribs, while a woman and child who were in the burning apartment managed to scramble out the window.
The blaze broke out at 3am, and Mr Wright was quick to explain why he was barbecuing at such a peculiar time of the evening.
“It was three o’clock in the morning, I was hungry man, I was like put them ribs on there,” he said.
Jim Morrison's life came to an end far too early, his heart stopped by an apparent heroin overdose, but French law enforcement officials didn't perform an autopsy so we'll never know for sure how the Lizard King died.
All we have to tell us about those fateful days before Jim slipped away in the bathtub are a series of candid photos taken by friend Alain Ronay.
Jim looks clean shaven and happy as he shares some intimate moments with Pamela Courson in Saint-Leu-d’Esserent on June 28th, 1971, a far cry from the image of a dark and disturbed man painted by the press after his death.
I'm sure you all know by now that the NeatoShop is the best place to go for geeky t-shirts, hoodies and all kinds of different embellished torso coverings, but did you know the NeatoShop is currrently having a sale?
Sightings of a lone sheep in Australia were reported to the RSPCA, and a crew from the agency captured it Tuesday. Chris, as they named him, is a Merino sheep that had gone unshorn for at least five years. A team of five volunteer sheep shearers, including national champion Ian Elkins, worked for 40 minutes to remove 89 pounds of wool! See if you can find Chris among all that the wool in this picture.
Klingenberg's farm is a massive lab and playhouse for him to experiment with. Most recently, he found an unconventional use for his drone. He attached fishing line, bait, and a hook, then flew it over a pond. Soon enough, he caught a fish!