Team Twaggies's Blog Posts

no. 778 - @NickFlora

How did the hipster burn his mouth? He ate the soup before it was cool. #wockawocka @NickFlora

no. 777 - @funnyoneliners

To err is human, to arr is pirate. @funnyoneliners  

no. 776 - @Schmoodles

~Illustrated by: @LisaAnnWilson~

Hey, boys! Sex tip:

1. Buy an iPod Classic. 2. Practice scrolling down to ZZ Top. @Schmoodles

no. 775 - @GuyEndoreKaiser

  ~Illustrated by Joy and Noelle of Twins Are Weird~

If you draw a bunch of X’s on the ground, every once in a while a lazy pirate will bury his gold under one of them. @GuyEndoreKaiser

no. 774 - @Schmoodles

~Illustrated by: @LisaAnnWilson~

Toaster settings: No.1: "I do nothing." No.2: "I do nothing." No.3: "I do nothing." No.4: "I SET BREAD ON FIRE!" @Schmoodles


no. 773 - @yoyoha

"Let's sleep in when we can't sleep in, and not sleep in when we can sleep in" - children @yoyoha

no. 772 - @jessicasrcook

Proverbs are just vintage tweets @jessicasrcook


no. 771 - @jdelwoo

what was that, dudes, you can pee standing up? sorry i couldn't hear you over the sound of my 6th orgasm @jdelwoo

no. 770 - @arnie

Men are from Mars. Women are on Pinterest. @arnie

no. 769 - @trevso_electric

"Let's tape a spider to a lobster and scare the shit out of everyone forever." -God making scorpions  @trevso_electric

no. 768 - @ryaninco

I had an hour to kill so I watched the last two minutes of a basketball game today @ryaninco

no. 767 - @jenstatsky

What's the right age to tell a film that it's adapted?  @jenstatsky

no. 766 - @kellyoxford

The world won't change until there's a tampon commercial where the girls are all curled up on couches and angrily drinking wine. @kellyoxford

no. 765 - @TheDailyShow

Tonight: Trump v. Murdoch. May the worst man win. - @TheDailyShow

no. 764 - @TheDailyShow

Daily Show in five minutes! Stop whatever you're doing! Unless you're a fireman. Or a surgeon. Or Mick Jagger... Actually, Mick? Stop it. @TheDailyShow

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Profile for Team Twaggies

  • Member Since 2013/05/06


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