Here's a thought...

Put down the camera, stop screaming like a freaking sissy, and get involved.

I would never let someone's pet get attacked without running in to try and help. I don't blame the deer. I blame the person filming, what a loser.

Glad the dog is okay, but when you actually read the story, that girl comes off like a total twit.

"Noochi’s dead, she said.

Did you try mouth-to-mouth? Kyle Deno asked.

It was too gross, Moriah said."

So basically she gave up on mouth to mouth because it was gross... not the most heroic thing I've ever read.

The world's worst merry-go-round.

"What are you doing? You're slowing down! You're slowing down!"

"I'm bringing him in closer, Merlin."

"You're going to do what?!"

"I'm gonna hit the brakes, he'll fly right by."

It's a gadget for storing a small length of rope.

They sell them at Brookstone.

I think it has a barometer on the back.

Bea Arthur's penis?

"I swear kid, if you lose your contacts one more time we're getting you glasses."

congrats man. well deserved.

Would have been better without carpet...

I've been a vegetarian for 18 years. If they came up with a truly cruelty free way to produce meat, I would be the first one in line at Sizzlers(that's where people eat meat, right?).

Even for breakfast, breakfast is the most important meal of the day.

"We should invite some of the guys over for a little scramble."

Quietly, Coffee watched as they drank her offspring. Confident in the knowledge that neither of them would survive the morning.

"Those pork omelets were amazing! What do you think they put in there?"