"We've got to rent a dumpster to get rid of these broken pieces of concrete."

"OK. How much is a dumpster?"

"A couple of hundred bucks, probably"

"What? We ain't got that kind of money. There's got to be a better way."

"Like what?"

"How about if we give it away?"

"Who'd take broken pieces of concrete?"

"Well, dummy, you don't tell them that. See, it's all in the marketing!"

Hire that man for your next ad campaign! You've got to admit that's pretty clever. Best of all, after completing the puzzle, you get a whole new concrete patio!

I should be the last person to complain about proofreading. Even though I do proofread, I miss typos at an alarming rate. Then again, you don't know how many times I've inserted a typo just to get a comment.

However, when your sign specifically brags about attention to detail, you'd better look it over. This one contains both a typo and a grammar error. So was it a drunk sign painter or a very good Photoshop? It's my favorite picture out of Buzzfeed's list of 27 Reasons Why You Should Always Proofread. I also like Mom's response to a knock knock joke.

(Image credit: Elisa Ward)

Via This is The Internet

Okay, okay. First, I apologize for the NSWF typo in the text, but it's just too funny not to post.

Notice that it's "48-in-1" DVD. What does that even mean? There are 48 movies in that disc? (the one below it is even more impressive - 60-in-1!) Why, that's even MORE remarkable than the match between Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson and Sean Connery.

So, who do you think will win? My money is on Sean Connery, because didn't he already take on the Rock and win?

"Bad jokes. Awkward dancing. Amazing balloons," Rob the Balloon Guy's website promises. But please, no robbery - that'll just make him feel deflated.

Rob the Balloon Guy has got the best tagline in the long and twisted history of entertaining people with balloons. Redditor matlockga shares his clever business card, which astute Neatoramanauts will notice can be greatly improved with an Oxford comma. Or not. Because, you know, humor trumps clarity any day, especially when it comes to balloons and eating grandpa. So don't pop Rob the Balloon Guy's lack of punctuation, mmkay?

(Larger image)

The United States of America sure has a lot of states, and to most non-Americans, the details of which states is which sure can get lost. Fast.

Here's a hilarious annotation of the various states of the USA, as labeled by an Australian who doesn't know anything about its geography. The map has gone viral on Tumblr and reddit.

The bloke got Texas, Florida, Hawaii, Alaska, Washington and Missoula, er, California, correct, but the rest are borderline genius guesses. These include rectangle and wibbly rectangle states and the various versions of Virginias (there sure are a lot of them), roadkill wolf, kite, lava lamp and Washington 2 (Yes, Aussies, we have two Washingtons, just to make it confusing for you - one is a state and the other one is not a state, but it wants to be)

View the larger map here.

John posted about the story of how Ashlee Owens rode her horse to the DMV to get her driver's license back - and that was hard to top, but I think I've found a mode of transportation that's even stranger. Behold, a hipster riding a camel in Södermalm, Sweden.

What can I say, dromedaries rule (even if it's an ad campaign for a comedy show making fun of hipsters. Heck, the camel even has his own Facebook page.)

(Photo: Penny Smith)

Although it doesn’t have the same effect as holding up the heart of one your enemies, this is still pretty badass. But dealing with hardship with good spirits has always been Penny Smith’s strength. She had cancer when she was 3 years old and developed heart problems in 1994. Last year, she had a heart transplant.

Here she is holding up her old heart while her new one keeps her alive. This photo was taken a few months after her transplant:

"That was in the hospital in the pathology lab," Smith said. "I was saying goodbye to my heart, actually, because I felt like it got me through half of my life and I needed to say goodbye to it. So I was saying goodbye, and getting to know my new heart.

"My doctors made me wait because they didn't think I was ready. I wanted to be able to hold it, and they didn't want me to drop it.

"I was happy to see it again-well, see it for the first time, I guess.

"My husband even got to hold it. It felt really weird for both of us, but it was amazing to get to hold something that was once in someone."

You may think you're tough, but are you "Holding your own heart in your hand" tough? pic.twitter.com/rgJYZKeZg4

— Robb Allen (@ItsRobbAllen) October 23, 2013

I found this story while searching for information about the above photo, which is also impressive to an almost Ron Swanson level.

(Photo: unknown)

Rocket News 24 reports that this photo and others are circulating through Japanese-language Twitter feeds. Allegedly, they show one lucky Siberian husky who has a new friend: a tiny plush felted from his own hair. You can see more adorable photos here.

It looks much better than the one that Alex made from his own hair, which is more creepy than cute.

(Photo: unknown)

In the movie Gran Torino, Walt Kowalski said that a man can do half of household repairs with just WD-40, vise-grips and duct tape. Well, maybe. But vise-grips won't spread on toast or mix well with ice cream.

You can lick vise-grips, but it's just not the same experience as Nutella.

-via That's Nerdalicious!

Photo: orzzs.com - via Daily Picks and Flicks

Remember that centipede crab that John posted yesterday? When it needs to go somewhere fast, it doesn't crawl ... it rides this motorcycle made out of lobster shell (previously on Neatorama).

The lobster shell bikes were created back in 2011 by Taiwanese food carving artist Huang Mingbo. The lobstercycles - which come complete with mirrors, kickstands and their own license plates - were displayed at a cooking art festival in Fuzhou, China.

According to the Daily Mail, Huang got the idea after he got tired of throwing away the shells when cooking lobster.

Photo: Xinhua News/haixinews.com.cn

Photo: Zheng Shuai/Xinhua News/PeopleDaily.com.cn

Photo: house.nhaidu.com

Now, who's gonna buy me some lobsters so I can make my own lobstercycle?

Photo: Anna Gorbunova - via Sib.fm

A lot of what we know about genetics come from studies using lab mice, so scientists at the Institute of Cytology and Genetics in Novosibirsk, Russia, came up with this tribute: a monument featuring a cute bespectacled mouse knitting a strand of DNA.

Prof. Nikolai Kolchanov of the institute said to Sib.fm, that the monument "symbolizes gratitude for the animal that humanity has used to study genetics, molecular and physical mechanisms of diseases, as well as for the development of new drugs."

The mouse was sculpted by local artist Andrew Kharkevich, who said, "It combines the image of the laboratory mouse and a scientists ... [The] mouse is captured in the moment of scientific discovery. If you look into her eyes, you can see that this little mouse has come up with something. But the whole symphony of scientific discovery, joy, "Eureka" have not yet been voiced"

(Photo: Donald Graves)

A crimson tide sweeps across the driveway, thanks to this customized modern Volkswagen beetle showing the elephant mascot of the University of Alabama. I'm not sure who made this car, but I suspect that it's owned by Ray, the operator of Tide Rides and owner of a vast collection of University of Alabama collectibles.

Do you see the football helmet in that background? I suspect that it is Ray's motorized football helmet, which moves at a surprisingly quick pace:

(Video Link)

If you disapprove, then keep your mouth shut about it while in Alabama. You'll be punished cruelly.

Roll Tide!

-via Jalopnik

(Photo: unknown)

Twitter user Takumi1217 says that he likes crab, but he wouldn't eat this one. I'd try the centipede crab, but I'd make sure that it was dead first before I got too close.

-via Rocketnews24

The political circus that is the United States Government shutdown continues ... and since urgent exhortations by everyone don't seem to have an effect, employees of the National Weather Service in Anchorage, Alaska, decided to go the subtle subliminal route, as reported by the Washington Post (Thanks Tiffany!)

In the weather forecast released on October 4, 2013, the currently furloughed employees encoded a secret message: the first letter of the lines spelled out "Please pay us."

The technique is not new, of course. You all probably still remember when then California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger utilized this technique to send a message to the state legislature for vetoing his proposed legislation.

(Photo: Jennifer Andrews)

You're being awfully foward, Cuttlefish. We've just barely started this job interview!

-via Knitqueer