Here's the Chuck Norris Giveaway Page you've been looking for! You're just one step away from winning one of ten Chuck Norris plush dolls that we found hiding biding their time in a corner of the NeatoShop warehouse. Please note that these dolls don't have a working voicebox because Chuck Norris is too awesome for words. He doesn't need to say anything to get things done.
But first, check out the NeatoShop's Fourth of July and Summer Sale! Save up to 20% off the neatest, most awesome T-shirts you'll find on the web. With nearly 30,000 designs available, there's one that's perfect for you! Get free worldwide shipping on orders $75 and up (yes, we do mean worldwide.)
Back to Chuck - Here's how to enter the giveaway:
1. Visit the NeatoShop and take a look around to find your favorite T-shirt design. If you need a suggestion, how about the Funny T-Shirts, Sci-Fi T-Shirts, Science T-Shirts and Fantasy T-Shirts categories?
2. In the comment below, tell us your favorite artwork and the artist who designed it.
3. Optional: tell us your favorite Chuck Norris Facts alongside your T-shirt selection.
Need some inspiration? Here are a few of our favorite Chuck Norris Facts:
- Google won't search for Chuck Norris. It knows you don't find Chuck Norris - He finds you.
- Death once had a near-Chuck Norris experience.
- Chuck Norris' calendar went from March 31 straight to April 2. Because no one fools Chuck Norris.
- People wanted to add Chuck Norris to Mount Rushmore, but the granite was not tough enough for his beard.
- Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
One entry per person. Multiple entries will be disqualified. We'll pick 7 winners at random and 3 winners with the funniest, most original Chuck Norris Fact (and believe me, we've heard most of 'em, so go for unique, mmkay?)
The winner will be notified through our comment system, so be sure to use a valid email address. Good luck, everyone!
Update July 29, 2015: Congratulations to the ten winners! They have been notified via Neatorama's private messages and have 3 days to claim their prizes or forfeit them forever! The winners are: 11 Rudy K., 13 Rene C., 64 Chris M., 7 Peter E., 37 Sharyn, 59 Rawhorne, 47 YetiDad, 52 DemonHub, 28 Toni C., 3. Andrew M. Thank you to everyone who played - if you didn't win, there's always next time! :)
(Required) T-Shirt design name AND artist
(Optional, but will increase your chance of winning) Your favorite Chuck Norris Fact
Good luck, Neatoramanauts!
Chuck Norris once lit his fart on fire, that fart is now known as the sun!
You know what to do now ;) Thanks.
Also, it is a very well known fact that 9 out of 10 doctors agree that the 10th doctor should've never have said "No" to Chuck Norris.
Bandicoot Time black, by Paula Garcia
Chuck Norris completed Castlevania 1 on NES without upgrading the whip, without using any items nor any continue, with his hands in his back, blindfolded and within 1' 45'' (coffee break included). Love Castlevania so it made me laugh ^^
Favorite fact: Chuck Norris and I share the same birthday (but not birth year).
I would be able to celebrate with Plush Chuck Norris next March...
There once was a street called Chuck Norris, but the name was changed for public safety because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.
I met Chuck Norris at my hotel in New Orleans during Mardi Gras. We were both hungover. Found out he was Grand Marshall of parade!!!
Bonus: Chuck Norris doesn't have a mullet. His beard has back hair.
Also...
A lot people don't know this but before the Boogyman goes to sleep at night, he checks his closets for Chuck Norris. I mean let's be honest...wouldn't you? Everyone knows the story of how Chuck Norris played Russian roulette with a fully loaded gun...and won. Twice. The guy's a fucking savage.
And since this is to win a tshirt...this is fitting. :)
Chuck Norris doesnt wear Chuck Norris sayings T-Shirts...he shaves the saying in his chest hair.
The best armor you can get in Skyrim is a shirt worn by Chuck Norris which is dropped by a level 1 gaurd once every 10000000 kills.
Fear of spiders is arachnophobia, fear of tight spaces is claustrophobia, fear of Chuck Norris is called Logic.
Chuck Norris doesn't do push-ups he pushes down the world.
Church Norris fact: Chuck Norris can fold a piece of paper in half 9 times.
AND: (couldn't chose just one) When Batman gets in trouble, he turns on the Chuck Norris light.
Chuck Norris doesn't have a chin beneath his beard, it's a third fist.
Chuck Norris doesn't breathe. Air runs into his lungs for safety.
JURASSIC CUCCOS by Kayden007
BIG NINJA 6 by Fernando Sala
or
BIG BOBA 6 by Fernando Sala
Chuck Norris Joke: "Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table of elements because Chuck Norris only acknowledges the element of surprise."
FACT: Chuck Norris does not use the Force; he is the Force!
Chuck Norris invented hamburger by throwing a cow through a chain link fence
Chuck Norris fact: When he slices onions, onions cry.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
Chuck Norris once peed in the gas tank of a semi truck as a joke. That truck is now known as Optimus Prime.
Chuck Norris and Superman made a bet once. The loser had to start wearing their underwear outside their pants.
(I know it's two, but they're so funny I couldn't choose)
Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now now just as "The Islands"
Chuck Norris doesn't play "hide-and-seek." He plays "hide-and-pray-I-don't-find-you."
Thanks for all of the Chuck Norris jokes... er... Truths. Enjoyed the laughs!
Chuck Norris doesn't flush the toilet. He just scares the sh*t out of it.
Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim through land.
FAST FACT: There are four legal methods of execution in the United States: lethal injection, gas chamber, electric chair and Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris does not do push ups; he pushes the Earth down and gravity pulls the Earth back to HIM.
Chuck Norris fact: Chuck Norris was once bitten by a cobra. Three days later the cobra died.
Chuck Norris fact: Chuck Norris can read a sundial by night - to the second!
Nobody says anything about Chuck's redhead hair because he invented the term "Ginger Snaps" for a reason ;)
The new BER Airport in Berlin,Germany, is now years and years in the making and has an estimated cost of 4 Billion Euros so far. It had dozens of main responsables so far, and each and everyone was a failure.
But now, Chuck Norris is reponsable.
Opening is tomorrow.
When Chuck Norris visits a cemetary, he just smiles and says, "Good times..."
Artist : markwelser
Norris Fact : Every time you feel a breeze in your neck, it's Chuck Norris breathing. They call that the Norris Effect.
Norris Fact: When Chuck Norris goes swimming in the ocean, he doesn't get wet, the oceam gets Chuck Norrised.
Norris Fact: Chuck Norris is more interesting than The Most Interesting Man in the World.
Norris Fact: Chuck Norris ended World War II with his beard
When Alexander Graham Bell invented the telephone he had three missed calls from Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. That horse's descendants are known as giraffes.
There is no “ctrl” button on Chuck Norris’s computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.
Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table of elements because he only recognizes the element of surprise.
Chuck Norris doesn't have friends on Facebook: only targets
When plush dolls are named "Chuck Norris Plush Dolls" they are no longer plush or dolls, they become avatars of death and are the second hardest things in the universe, after Chuck Norris.
I told a Chuck Norris joke to Chuck Norris once. He laughed so hard he busted MY gut.
Did you know Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer? Too bad he has never cried.
Chuck Fact- Superheroes dress up as Chuck Norris for Halloween.
Some men piss their name in the snow. Chuck Norris pisses his name into concrete.
Chuck Norris knows Victoria's secret.