The Non-Physical Trait We Find Most Attractive

It's not all about the looks as people in relationships would often say. Though some form of chemistry should be there, stronger relationships are based on more than just outside appearances, and in a way, that's why we're most attracted to people who make us feel happy.

A major factor in our attraction to others is the way they make us feel. We are drawn to people who make us feel happy, hopeful, and optimistic, and when they are gone, we want to see them again. Research reveals how this works.

We love to be around people with whom we are most comfortable. We tend to avoid toxic people and we gravitate toward those who give us good vibes. The research found that there are two types of emotions involved in relationships: trait affect and trait affective presence.

They found positive affective presence to be linked with greater “network centrality”—reflected in the number of individuals who listed the participant as a close friend—and negative affective presence linked with greater extraversion, but lower agreeableness.

Finding that affective presence goes beyond emotional contagion, they recognize that the emotion elicited is not just about catching the emotions others are experiencing. They suggest that mechanisms of transmission may include differences in expressive style—non-verbal cues, for example—as well as patterns of interpersonal behavioral, such as acts of warmth or dominance.

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