Scatter: the Story Of Elvis Presley's Pet Chimpanzee

Neatorama presents a guest post from actor, comedian, and voiceover artist Eddie Deezen. Visit Eddie at his website or at Facebook.

Elvis Presley was, quite possibly, the most famous and successful entertainer of all time. And just as he was onstage, Elvis was "bigger than life" in his private life, too. Whether it was women, fast cars, or, on a much sadder note, drugs, Elvis never did anything halfway.

But a lesser-known aspect of "The King" was his great love for animals. Elvis had countless pets over the course of his life: dogs, horses, birds, etc. etc But none was stranger (and funnier) than Elvis' pet chimpanzee, Scatter.

Scatter was nothing but trouble from day one, but something about him must have appealed to Elvis' offbeat sense of humor and questionable sense of fun.

Scatter had one particular odd habit: he loved to pull up girls' dresses! Now obviously, in our currently politically correct society, this trait would not be tolerated as it was then.

Elvis loved women, and he would invite many pretty girls to visit him at Graceland, to play pool, listen to his records, eat, drink, and of course, in certain cases, accompany him to his bedroom for more intimate activities.

Scatter, a natural ham, loved to make a big entrance at Elvis' parties. Scatter's loud, ringing "Woooo-woooo-wooo" would startle the guests, and many of the female guests would start screaming like Faye Wray.

While shooting pool, many a girl was surprised (and probably very scared) to have Scatter scamper over and pull up her dress, much to the amusement of Elvis and his boys. This seems like good old "boys will be boys" behavior, but like anything else, embarrassment is very subjective. I'm sure some girls could take it with a laugh and see how juvenile it was. But I'm sure this must have been extremely embarrassing to some of these poor, unsuspecting girls.

On one occasion, two of Elvis' guests were becoming "better acquainted" in one of the bedrooms at Graceland. Elvis decided to turn Scatter loose in the room. Scatter opened the door, ran over, and jumped up and down on the bed. The poor lady's screams echoed through the house, and she was eventually calmed down. The man picked up Scatter and threw him out the door, but the lovemaking was over for the night.  

Not all of Scatter's antics were this mean-spirited. Elvis loved to dress Scatter up in suits, Hawaiian shirts, and caps. He loved to put Scatter in the front seat of his Rolls-Royce limo and have him chauffeured around the city. At traffic lights, Elvis liked to have the driver duck down and have Scatter sit in the driver's seat. The other drivers would look over and see Scatter in a chauffeur's uniform and cap, and they would freak out. Elvis found this gag hilarious.

Elvis' neighbors were not fond of Scatter. Once, he got loose and chased a Japanese gardener, who jumped into the swimming pool to get away.

On another occasion, Scatter tried his old trick of pulling up a lady's skirt. But this time, a particularly tough girl said, "Do that again and I'll knock the hell out of you!" Sure enough, Scatter did it again and the girl belted him with an uppercut to the chin. Scatter literally turned a backflip, landing on the couch.

Scatter's behavior eventually go so out of control that Elvis finally had to banish him to a climate-controlled room made especially for him. Scatter reportedly turned very mean, missing his previous free rein. Once, when the maid, Daisy, brought Scatter his food, he ripped the wig off her head.

Scatter died shortly after his banishment, presumably of natural causes. But many believe Scatter, who missed being the center of attention, died of a broken heart.

"Elvis's Chimp" by The Extras. (YouTube link)

Love cute animals? View more at Lifestyles of the Cute and Cuddly blog

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Elvis was mostly an idiot. His choice of "pets" is simply on the list of reasons why. The chimp's life was short, his care irresponsible, and "simply not knowing any better" doesn't excuse animal cruelty. Nothing "neat" about a chimp getting slugged by a floozie and eventually dying for it.
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I have been thinking about the statement, "Elvis Presley was, quite possibly, the most famous and successful entertainer of all time."

In his day, Bing Crosby was the king of all media: Recorded music, Live radio, TV and Movies. According to Wikipedia he was the best selling artist of the 20th century. Of course, he did nt leave us a Graceland.
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