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What Is It? Game 145

W00t! It's time for this week's collaboration with the always perplexing What Is It? Blog. Can you tell us what the strange contraption above is used for?

Place your guess in the comment section. One guess per comment, please, though you can enter as many guesses as you'd like. Please post no URL or web link - doing so will invalidate your entry.

Two prizes as usual: the first correct guess and the funniest yet wrong guess will each win a T-shirt from the NeatoShop. Your pick (we suggest checking out our Science T-Shirts and Funny T-Shirts sections). Important: Please write your T-shirt selection along with your guess. If you don't make a selection, you forfeit the prize.

For more clues, check out the What Is It? Blog. Good luck!

Update 7/17/10 - the answer is: A British Absolute Block Signaling Instrument, used to "facilitate the safe operation of a railway by preventing more than one train from occupying a defined section of route at the same time. This system is used on double or multiple lines where use of each line is assigned a direction of travel." The Millom Station is in the town of Millom in Cumbria, England.

Congratulations to Edward who got it right out of the bat, and to Uncle Mark for the gastrointestinal system status device! Sadly, he didn't choose a T-shirt.

absolute block signalling device. fit is for the safe operation of a railways and prevents more than one train from using a route simultaneously.
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A device for displaying your gastrointestinal system's status. The 'up line' part being from the stomach; the 'down line' part you can figure. The button in the lower right dispenses Pepto tablets when needed.
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Turn-of-the-century phone switching device for multi-level marketers. Patented by Amway in 1912. It lets you arrange conference calls with your upline and downline.

"How many presentations did you make this week, George? Did you draw the diagram like I showed you?"

Save the Ales, XL
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A device invented and marketed by former Alaskan senator Ted Stevens for testing the "series of tubes" interface used in high-speed connections to the "intertubes".

His sales pitch...

"The Internet is not something that you just dump something on. It's not a big truck. It's a series of tubes. And if you don't understand, those tubes can be filled and if they are filled, when you put your message in, it gets in line and it's going to be delayed by anyone that puts into that tube enormous amounts of material, enormous amounts of material."
--United States Senator Ted Stevens (R-Alaska)

Extendable Back Scratcher. Eczema Flavored please.
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In old warehouses they used to have a system for sending invoices from one end of the building to the other using a clothesline and a spring powered carriage. This item fires the carriage down the line.
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back in MY day we didn't talk about personal intimate matters, not even with each other behind closed doors.

So, we used these devices to communicate through out the day what our expectations or interest were for the night.

Red not happening,
Green we're interested,
White, open to suggestion.

Through out the day we'd check the corresponding statuses and lock in our selections by night time. For someone to find out who was designated "Up" or "Down" was truly scandelous, therefore we used the knob on the bottom right to mix it up, keep us guessing and every one else too!
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This is fishing device, it is designed to monitor multiple fishing lines simultaneously, allowing the user to enjoy a beer and flirt with his sister/cousin/mother instead of paying attention to his gear.

Something Somewhere went terribly wrong T-shirt, 2xl
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An absolute block signaling device. Used for the safe operation of a single track railways, prevents more than one train from using the track at the same time. Up Line and Down Line indicate direction of traffic.
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For the addict who has everything: a machine to tell you whether you're wasting your cocaine! Sit in front of machine with your mirror, your 2 lines of coke (up and down lines), and your straw or $100 bill. Now snort. Machine will indicate whether you stay on your line, whether your nasal passages are blocked, and when your line is all clear. Don't waste a milligram again!
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oops! forgot: how about the Sexy Blogger T shirt in Ladies Pink, Large.

For the addict who has everything: a machine to tell you whether you're wasting your cocaine! Sit in front of machine with your mirror, your 2 lines of coke (up and down lines), and your straw or $100 bill. Now snort. Machine will indicate whether you stay on your line, whether your nasal passages are blocked, and when your line is all clear. Don't waste a milligram again!
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This indicator is used in old-fashioned, high-class toilets. The "up line" section indicates whether or not water is filling up the flush tank. The "down line" part... well, let's just say it tells you whether or not you had too much chili-beans last night!

Average Bear T-shirt
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It's Apple's new MacBook Air netbook*. They're going fully ironic.

*iMoving Picture Tube and iPrinting Telegraph not included.

Booty Call, M dark gray
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Edward,

I agree, and you have to give Stevens credit for even trying to understand the internet and, better still, to try to explain it to the rest of the senate.

If I was 80+ years old I wouldn't give a hell about you young whippersnappers and your newfangled interwebs, with your HTTP, and your packet sniffers.

Back in the olden days we only had H-single-T-P... and we liked it.

And and only router security we had was my father's M1903 Springfield that he brought back with him from the Great War.
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At first I was thinking it was an old Scientology E-meter. Since the orginal E-meters were nothing more than two tin cans, wire and a resistance meter, I decided against that vote.
I do believe it is a Block Signal Box. Basically, it was used for railway traffic control. If that's not what it is, then I have no idea.
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It's a sailing school compass, for newby navigators who don't know about North and South yet. Also serves as a floatation device for when they fall overboard.
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This would be an ancient internet meter to tell you when you're online. Or it's one of those ancient sex meters that lets people know that their next in line to be serviced. he he
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