Fodey's Nija Text Generator.

A real football from the times where football players where real football players, cheerleader where real cheerleaders and small furry creatures from Alpha Centauri where real small furry creatures from Alpha Centauri....

http://www.neatoshop.com/product/walk-like-an-Egyptian

suggested colour size m

Old school depth charge?

http://www.neatoshop.com/product/walk-like-an-Egyptian size small

Never before seen photo of Chuck Norris as a zygote.

Give Us Back Firefly? XL

Leonardo da Vincis first "aerial bomb", designed to be dropped from one of the flying machines he designed...

http://www.neatoshop.com/product/We-Follow-You

ladies fit 2xl suggested colour

It's a scale model of the drilling machine used by the foot clan in the old Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cartoon.

Star T-Rex, XL, Black

It's a reversable replacement garden gnome, when they escape. One side is the spike to hold it in the ground, and the other side is their hat!

Star T-Rex, XL, Black

It's a high-pressure beer keg, for the most desperate after-graduation celebrations.

Star T-Rex, XL, Black

It's the head of a really large, really gruesome pick axe.

Star T-Rex, XL, Black

It's the next tool that Game of Thrones is going to use to kill off their characters.

Star T-Rex, XL, Black

Stewie Griffin's bondage helmet.

This please:

Constellation 42 T shirt, in black, size large

It's a Civil War era Bouncing Betty. When they didn't have a cannon available, they'd fill this with explosives and roll it down the hill at their enemies.

Star T-Rex, XL, Black

It's the newest barrel-protection in Mirkwood, to keep Dwarves and Hobbits from taking their barrels on a trip down the river... again.

Star T-Rex, XL, Black

It's a gun powder distributor. The small hole on the end makes sure that only the right size trail of gun powder is left behind, and the square attachment in the middle allows the distributor to be mounted on a very long pole, so the operator doesn't blow himself up.

Star T-Rex, XL, Black

Medieval, double ended, anal widener, with optional lube reservoir.
One of these please:
Keep calm and adventure on T shirt, black, large

Its a civil war mine.

Stop that its Silly, XL Blue

It's a torpedo for the USS Monitor
My Tee:
http://www.neatoshop.com/product/Look-Out-Schrodingers-Cat-Its-a-Trap Size Small

It's a butter churn/torpedo for the USS Monitor- shoot your enemy ships and make butter at the same time!

My tee:
http://www.neatoshop.com/product/Look-Out-Schrodingers-Cat-Its-a-Trap
Size: small

It's the collar attachment for the "Dogs of War" model St. Bernard.

http://www.neatoshop.com/product/The-Scientific-Mole

Men's L Royal blue

Civil War Keg Torpedo

Paul Bunyan's plumb bob.
The Love Bug, 2x, Charcoal

It's the barrel used in 1943 when two gnomes, Gigli and Migli, went over Niagara Falls. When asked why they didn't just remove their hats and use a regular barrel, Gigli replied "remove our what now?"

Cat suit cream Med

This is the actual dressmaker's form used to make several of Madonna's costumes.

Winter is Coming (snow angel) M

I believe that it is a medieval rectal suppository specifically designed for torture dungeons.

Time and Space Mayhem - Deep Royal - Medium

Confederate Torpedo

The creation of a highly intelligent St. Bernard

Tee: "I don't care" Large

That is the head of the Neatorama Ban Hammer.

It's a late 18th century/early 19th century "torpedo", what we'd call a naval mine.

Time-y Wimey T, size XL

Part of an early pneumatic tube system for ride-up banking. Put your gold dust, chickens, etc. into the carrier (pictured) then crank the blower handle to send it to the teller.

Great Vocab Didn't Save the Thesaurus (Silver, 2XL)

This was a bit too small for Miley Cyrus to swing on in her video. Plus "Came in like a pendulum" just doesn't have the same ring to it as "Came in like a wrecking ball".
The Love Bug, 2x, Charcoal

The mold for Madonna's bra.

Sharkasm XL

It is little known that in Victorian England, a secret Royal Project used a giant cannon to launch a mouse and successfully landed it in this tiny craft upon the Moon. The reinforced barrel ship was recovered, but, alas, the mouse had decided to stay behind for the cheese.

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Canned Octopus, Black, XL

Hi,
I think it's a training egg for competition ostriches.
We understand the value of the pointed shape on each side.
Ostriches thank us for that matter.
The black part allows to "reset" the laying process for more training.

ED209 Service and Repair Manual, M, Please