Blog Posts John Farrier Likes

World's Scariest Wedding Invitation

Matt and Nancy are getting married in May. Matt happens to be the sheriff. When the wedding invitations went out, the recipients were startled, and some of them probably hyperventilated before they read the fine print. The bride's nephew EXSUPERVILLAIN shared the themed invitation with some rather sloppy redaction. With a username like that, he was probably more startled than anyone. -via reddit

View more fun pics over at our NeatoPicto Blog

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Hiding A.1. Steak Sauce Bottles in the Library

Jill Ralston of the Avon Lake Public Library shows off more than two dozens A.1. Steak Sauce bottles left hidden in the shelves. Photo: Bruce Bishop/Chronicle

It's a whodunit of the rarest of degree ... a real meaty mystery with high steaks: someone very saucy has been hiding bottles of A.1. Steak Sauce throughout the Avon Lake Public Library in Ohio, and nobody knows why.

Dan Cotton, the library’s page supervisor, said 28 of the 10-ounce bottles have turned up since he found the first one Jan. 11 hidden among the library’s newspapers.

No one has been spotted hiding the bottles, but it’s become almost a game among library staff to locate the bottles, which are typically left lying on their sides behind books on the shelf.

“It became something everyone wanted to find,” Cotton said. ...

“We mapped the first 12 to see if we could find a pattern, but we couldn’t find a discernible pattern,” Cotton said.

Brad Dicken of the Chronicle-Telegram has the nifty story. I propose a steak-out to find the culprit!

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How a College Student's "C" Paper Led to a Constitutional Amendment

Gregory Watson, photo by Jorge Sanhueza-Lyon/KUT

In 1789, James Madison proposed an amendment to govern how members of Congress could give themselves salary raises.

The proposed amendment was sent to the states for ratifications but was largely forgotten until a 19-year old student at the University of Texas at Austin named Gregory Watson wrote a paper on the subject in 1982.

Watson noticed that the amendment, though almost two centuries old, didn't have a deadline on it, so he proposed that it be revived and ratified. He turned in the paper ... and got a "C" on it because his professor thought that it was "unrealistic."

[Watson] didn’t know what to make of it. He was sure it was better than a C.

He appealed the grade to the professor, Sharon Waite.

“I kind of glanced at it, but I didn't see anything that was particularly outstanding about it and I thought the C was probably fine,” she recalls.

Most people would have just taken the grade and left it at that. Gregory is not most people.

“So I thought right then and there, ‘I'm going to get that thing ratified.’”

Read this fascinating story by Matt Largey over at KUT of how one man's not-so-great grade on a college paper started him on a decade-long quest that ended up with The Twenty-seventh Amendment to the United States Constitution.

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Spreadable Coffee

There's nothing better than a nice fresh hot cup of coffee in the morning. If you love coffee that much, you might want to try it on your toast! Or not. When people talk about coffee that's way too strong, they sometimes say it sticks to the roof of your mouth like peanut butter. That's the joke I thought of when I heard that spreadable coffee is now available in Japan.

According to Curazy, Snow Brand Milk is releasing a spreadable version of its coffee to mark the 55th anniversary of its release.

If you’ve ever had Snow Brand Milk’s Coffee, you’ll know it’s rather creamy and sweet, so it should make a good toast spread.

Ah, so it's from a milk company! The "spread" is probably mostly milk and sugar with some coffee in it for flavoring. That might not be bad at all, if you like that sort of thing. -via Boing Boing

We dish up more neat food posts at the Neatolicious blog

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A Very Early Spring

This year is the first time I've seen the trees on my street blooming in February. It isn't my imagination. Maps from the USGS-led USA National Phenology Network indicate where Mother Nature began thinking that spring arrived in February. The data, updated daily, comes from observations of budding trees, blooming flowers, and animal behavior. The map shown here is the Spring Leaf Index Anomaly for March first. The area in red indicates where the data shows spring arriving unusually early. -via Digg  

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Haircuts So Hilarious And Horrible They Became "Say No More" Memes

Getting a bad haircut once meant wearing a hat until the hair grew back, or shaving it all off and starting over again, but nowadays victims like to share their haircut-astrophe online so their friends can laugh with them.

But sometimes a haircut is so bad people see it online and have to share it with their own social network, and next thing you know somebody's turning that cringeworthy haircut pic into a meme.

Memes that involve a bad haircut become part of the "say no more fam" meme family, where people imagine what the victim must have said to the barber to end up with such a terrible haircut.

See 10+ Terrible Haircuts That Were So Bad They Became "Say No More" Memes here

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This Wonder Woman Has Her Own Invisible Jet

Chicago balloon artist Smarty Pants made tihs amazing invisible jet for a little tiny Wonder Woman to wear to a local convention. Now that's some creative cosplay!

Via Laughing Squid

See more about baby and kids at NeatoBambino

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Leia Choking Jabba in LEGO

Ochre Jelly (Iain Heath) is back with a Star Wars LEGO creation from the movie Return of the Jedi. It's the scene where Princess Leia gets her revenge on Jabba the Hut.

Carrie Fisher had been scheduled to appear at Emerald City Comic Con in Seattle this year, so I decided to make a LEGO tribute to her character from Star Wars, for the Brick Nation display that I'm involved in at that event. I had already seen LEGO tributes showing a demure Princess Leia shoving a floppy disk into some poor hapless droid, but I wanted to reimagine a moment from the original trilogy that really captured Fisher's feisty character!

This image is captioned "You gotta kill a lotta frogs to find your prince!" See other angles and closeups at Flickr. -Thanks, Iain!

See more pop culture LEGO art from Ochre Jelly

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The Pineapple Pizza Scandal

Pizza is pretty universal, but it varies from place to place. People will argue all day about pineapple pizza, which was developed not in Hawaii, but in Canada, which caused a small kerfuffle in that nation when President Guðni Jóhannesson of Iceland dissed pineapple pizza.

President Guoni Johannesson recently told a group of high school students during a Q&A that he was fundamentally opposed to pineapple on pizza — and that's not all. He went on to say if he could, he would ban pineapple as a pizza topping.

Johannesson clearly did not know his opinion would offend or even make the news. He responded on Facebook.

I like pineapples, just not on pizza. I do not have the power to make laws which forbid people to put pineapples on their pizza. I am glad that I do not hold such power. Presidents should not have unlimited power. I would not want to hold this position if I could pass laws forbidding that which I don´t like. I would not want to live in such a country. For pizzas, I recommend seafood.

Seafood? It's not all that uncommon on European pizzas, although it was pointed out that "fiskmeti" should have been translated as "fish" instead of seafood. Fish pizza? Like anchovies? Everyone has their own tastes. In Sweden, they use all kinds of fruit and other pizza toppings an American wouldn't consider. -via Metafilter

(Image credit: Janine)

Which topping should never appear on a pizza? You can select more than one.

We dish up more neat food posts at the Neatolicious blog

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These Donuts Come With a Shot of Whiskey Inside

We've posted a lot of crazy donuts in the past, but we've never seen them with a shot of alcohol inside. You can get a hold of these boozy, sweet treats at Denver's Habit Doughnut Dispensary and you can choose any liqour inside including rum, whiskey and vodka. Popular combinations include the Plain Jane and Blazed infused with Fireball, the new French Toast with whiskey, the Carbon (chocolate and espresso) with Kahlua, and the signature Habit Jumbleberry with vodka.

The alcohol comes in a pipette shoved in the donut so you can inject it into your mouth directly or eat a drippy, bite of booze-filled donuts. Adding a shot to your donut only costs $2, or $24 for a dozen.

See more pictures of the awesome donut combos on Thrillist.

We dish up more neat food posts at the Neatolicious blog

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Watch A Wild Orangutan Use A Handsaw To Cut A Branch

We all know how smart primates are, and how they have learned to use certain tools both with a little help from humans and on their own, but knowing about their craftiness cannot compare to seeing it in action.

So here's a video showing an orangutan from Southeast Asia using a handsaw to cut a branch in two, using her feet to hold the branch steady and clearing the sawdust from the cut as she works.

(YouTube Link)

This wild orangutan with a knack for sawing stuff is featured on the BBC nature documentary series Spy In The Wild, which features:

animatronic animals fitted with high-definition cameras, revealing never-before-seen footage of wildlife, up close and personal.

-Via IFL Science

Love cute animals? View more at Lifestyles of the Cute and Cuddly blog

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Animal Guards: Surprise!

Owls make the best guards because they have a 360 degree view of the action, and their hearing is so acute they can hear a sneaky critter coming a mile away, except for carp ninjas, of course, those guys are dead silent.

This edition of the comic Pitch Black by Andre Navarro is all about surprise, but what's really surprising is how enjoyable Pitch Black is to read, check out this bonus strip about cats and dogs at the office.

-Via Geeks Are Sexy

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Israeli Artist Shames Those Making Light of Berlin's Holocaust Memorial

There's no single right way to behave at a Holocaust memorial, but as a general rule, visitors should be respectful -and practicing parkour, doing gymnastics, juggling and snapping selfies are all examples of disrespectful behavior. Unfortunately, Berlin's Memorial to the Murdered Jews of Europe by architect Peter Eisenman is constantly filled with tourists taking selfies, playing hide and go seek, and otherwise ignoring the somber nature of the site. Even EasyJet published an eight-page fashion editorial in their magazine that was shot in the memorial.

That's why Israeli artist Shahak Shapira started showing how ugly and inappropriate these acts are by Photoshopping people's tasteless Facebook, Instagram, Tinder and Grindr photos into actual pictures of the Holocaust. The results are ugly and unpleasant, but they show exactly how callous the behavior of those in the images are. 

The project is called Yolocaust and Shapira made sure to include the number of likes each photo has to remind us that the people shooting the images aren't the only ones at fault.

Of course, those who find themselves on the page can get their images removed by emailing the highly appropriate address Meanwhile, you can see pictures of those tasteless people satired for their behavior on the Yolocaust website.

Via Tablet

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The First Observations of Sea Ice Came From 8th-Century Irish Monks in Iceland

Geographers in ancient times may have guessed that the ocean is cold enough near the Poles to freeze, but they did not leave written records of witnessing it. That job fell to Irish monks who were searching for a wilderness of solitude. Christianity came to Ireland in the 5th century (remember St. Patrick), and monasteries filled with students of the faith over the next few hundred years. Crowded monasteries caused monks to reach out even further north for a peaceful place to commune with God.

There’s not much evidence left of the journeys of these monastic explorers, but in later years Norse stories had a name from them, the papar. Gaelic monks settled on empty northern islands—Orkney, Shetland—but it’s also possible that they found their way to Iceland, where manmade caves, decorated with crosses, have convinced some archaeologists that there were settlers here before the Vikings.

An early Irish geographer, Dicuil, also writes of “priests who stayed on that island from the first of February to the first of August.” The year would have been 795, and Dicuil briefly notes a journey they took north. “These priests then sailed hence and, in day’s sail, did reach the frozen sea to the north.”

But there's always the possibility of finding even earlier records. Any would useful to those documenting the natural history of the ebb and flow of Arctic ice. Read more about the history of frozen seas as we know it at Atlas Obscura. 

(Image credit: Pink floyd88 a)

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Bunny Plays Jenga Like A Boss

All those cute videos people post online make rabbits look like really fun pets, because they're playful, silly and affectionate, not to mention super cute and fairly easy to care for.

However, I've owned three rabbits at different points in my life and this has not been my experience, because all three bunnies were bitey, skittish and wanted nothing to do with humans. 

I'd given up on being a bunny daddy before I saw this video posted by Foinz showing their bunny Simba playing Jenga like a little champ, and now I need all the bunnies!

(YouTube Link)

-Via Laughing Squid

Love cute animals? View more at Lifestyles of the Cute and Cuddly blog

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This is one of the reasons you waste time: you have so much to do, you don't know what to do first. That can lead to nothing at all getting done! But as you make your to-do list, put your priorities in order. The you'll have a clear idea of what's most important. In this comic from Chris at Lunarbaboon, the process resembles getting your ducks in a row, even if they are shaped like little devils.

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Disappointment in a Nutshell

This is why we can't have nice things. The Hide-Away Piano Bar in St. Louis had a great idea, but now it's only a great sign. I mean really, what could possibly go wrong with Lightsaber Night at a bar? Todd may be persona non grata in the neighborhood for quite some time, but the guy who did the sign is a hero for bringing a smile to the internet. -via reddit

View more fun pics over at our NeatoPicto Blog

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Disney Princesses Reimagined As Potatoes

These days, we have seen Disney princesses reimagined as just about every possible thing. Many of these have become downright silly, which is why this Imgur series is just so damn delightful. 

Recognizing some of the silly potato characters is a fun game -the one at the top is obviously Pocahontas, the one above is Elsa from Frozen, lastly, the final one is Snow White and the Seven Dwarves.

I think we may have finally seen the most absurd version of the reimagined princesses trend, which is saying a lot. You can see the rest of the series at Imgur.

Via That's Nerdalicious

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Why It Would Suck To Date An Anime Girl

Many Otakus think anime girls would make great girlfriends, because they're powerful and beautiful, with plenty of magical charm and cute little voices that can make a raging bull stop and smile.

But if these anime girls existed in the real world they would be virtually undateable, and any Otaku who made a play for them would instantly regret their decision.

Jealous boyfriends would rage when they're forced to watch as their anime GF falls on top of their male "friends" in suggestive ways over and over again, because that's how clumsiness is portrayed in anime.

The new BF would also have to deal with the brooding and sinister ex, who still somehow has a hold on that seemingly innocent little anime girl despite having tried to once tried to kill her.

But, as this comic by JHALL shows, the worst part about dating an anime girl would be the quest to find something to talk about, because they might be kick-ass warriors but they definitely aren't known for their conversational skills.

-Via Dorkly

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Guy's Girlfriend Says No Geeky Stuff Allowed In House, So He Hides It All In Plain Sight

It's a shame that geeks are unfairly judged by some simply because they're passionate about pop culture, but geeky pursuits really bother people for some strange reason, and yet these people will still date geeks.

This creates big problems when the two decide to move in together, since geeks typically collect geeky stuff that a hater won't want to see in their space, and stupid arguments ensue.

Imgur user ohhaibroadcast found out his girlfriend was an anti-geekite when she told him he couldn't put any of his geeky stuff upstairs, so he hid little Warhammer minis and LEGO figures around the house.

Meanwhile, his basement looks like nerdvana, so don't feel too bad for the guy:

He has a full sized MAME arcade cabinet, shelves full of board games, plenty of space for tabletop gaming, and a big screen and comfy recliners so he can watch movies about happy couples.

Something tells me their friends would rather hang out in the basement than upstairs in boring old Dullsville...

-Via TechEblog

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Forget Tardis Dresses, Here's a Stranger Things Dress

(Image Via Cosplay America)

Kitty Cosplay understands that Will is the most iconic character in Stranger Things, so when she decided to do a cosplay based on the Netflix show, she decided to go as Will while he was trapped in the Other Side and communicated with his mother. The decision to throw the Demigorgon's arm through the wall really sells the terrifying side of the show. I have to wonder if she was inspired at all by this previous Stranger Things wall cosplay.

Via Fashionably Geek

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Champion Gravediggers

We have long held that any human activity will eventually be made into a competition. The International Exhibition of Funeral, Burial and Cremation Services was held recently in Trenčín, Slovakia. One event during the convention was a grave digging competition. Eleven teams of two men each from Poland, Hungary, and Slovakia dug in to see who could produce the fastest and neatest grave, using only hand shovels and pickaxes. Slovakian brothers Ladislav Skladan and Csaba Skladan won by digging a grave five feet deep in only 54 minutes.  

"We want to show and appreciate the hard work of grave diggers," said Ladislav Striz, who established the contest last year.

"Most Slovak graveyards are so crowded and spaces between graves so narrow that we need human diggers instead of machines," he said. "They work hard, come rain, come snow."

Read about the competition and see more pictures at Reuters.  -via mental_floss

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Alexa Bass

(YouTube link)

The future of artificial intelligence! Brian Kane installed an Alexa Voice Service in his Billy Bass. They weren't kidding when they said you could add it to any device! The common response to this is, "Shut up and take my money!" But you can do this yourself, if you have a bit of skills. "Alexa, sing Take Me To The River!" -via reddit

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Making Cooking Pots From German Helmets

(Image Link)

Helmets are a life saver when you're fighting in a war, but you know what's useful come war, peace and utter doldrums? A cooking pot, which a helmet resembles when it's turned upside down.

After World War II many Germans found themselves destitute and without a pot to piss cook in, so steel factory workers started turning old helmets into cooking pots.

(YouTube Link)

This video posted by British Pathé shows steel factory workers turning surplus German military helmets into collanders and cooking pots, which is pretty neat to watch. Make soup, not war!

-Via Laughing Squid

We dish up more neat food posts at the Neatolicious blog

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How to Read The Secret Language of Starfleet Uniforms

If you want to celebrate Star Trek’s 50th anniversary with a Starfleet Halloween costume, go for it! But if you’re attending a party with die-hard Trek fans, you better be accurate. When Star Trek debuted in 1966, Gene Roddenberry color-coded Starfleet uniforms to indicate service divisions, and added gold braid to denote rank. However, he did not know how long the series would last and how many new iterations would follow. Besides, the production had a very skimpy budget. Starfleet uniforms evolved over the years as Star Trek went to movies and several more modern TV series. And some of the uniform innovations didn’t go over well.

The Star Trek movies that followed the cancellation of the original series, threw most of the original coloring schemes out the window for a cleaner look, which is surprisingly harder to read. In 1979’s Star Trek: The Motion Picture (which takes place in the mid-2270s), the bright colors were done away with and replaced with white, grey, and beige uniforms.

Here, a person’s position could be determined by the color of the ring behind the Starfleet insignia on their breast. A white ring was used for command, orange and green were used for the science divisions, and red, gold, and grey were used for operations. Rank was now worn on either the sleeve and/or on a shoulder tab. Thankfully, these creamy jumpsuits didn’t last long.

By 1982’s Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, Starfleet (and the film’s production department) had adopted an even more standardized and militaristic look. Taking place around the late-2270s, the second film introduced a standard maroon color that was worn by all officers in jumpsuit and jacket styles.

As Star Trek movies and series proliferated, writers and producers tried to streamline the color-coding and ranks, but time-travel plots further complicated the overall fashion scheme. You can catch up and get an idea of how Starfleet uniforms work in a rundown at Atlas Obscura. 

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Data & Picard

It’s been a while since we’ve heard a Pogo remix, so it’s extra-special that his new one is Star Trek themed! It’s a remix of sounds from Patrick Stewart as Captain Jean-Luc Picard and Brent Spider as Data. Even though it’s rendered as nonsense, you’d recognize those voices anywhere, wouldn’t you? And we even get to see Pogo!

(YouTube link)

From the YouTube page:

The track opens with the Klingon Victory Song, followed by a remix of Data singing Che Gelida Manina in the episode 'In Theory'. This episode was the first ever to be directed by Patrick Stewart and I didn't realize this until after the track was finished.

I sourced the Ben Nye makeup that was used to turn Spiner into Data, and a replica of the iconic Star Fleet uniform. Unfortunately I couldn't get the contact lenses in and I could only get the uniform in red, so I spent a huge amount of time changing the colour of my eyes and uniform in post.

Pogo is the professional name of Nick Bertke, whom we’ve featured many times before. -Thanks, Øystein Dale!

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Every Dystopian Young Adult Novel

Why are Young Adult novels so popular with young and old alike these days? Because of the formula- sexy plus pitiful plus surprisingly powerful equals dystopian hero born to save us all.

Add in a dash of the supernatural, some silly yet memorable names and a pinch of peril and you've got a formulaic story for the masses.

Prefer pictures to word problems? You can thank Adam Ellis for his illustrated breakdown of Every Dystopian YA Novel, which he posted on his site Books Of Adam. I wonder how he cracked the code?

-Via Geeks Are Sexy

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The Lewdest Sounding Town Names In The United States

People with dirty minds like to turn location names into crude jokes, and with the exception of places like Lake Titicaca that are totally asking for it these towns don't deserve to be thought of as smutty.

In fact, there are too many lewdly named places on the planet as it is, and in the United States there's at least one town with a lewd name in every single state, towns that were clearly founded by perverts.

Okay, so maybe you don't need a dirty mind to think town names like Humptulips, Wankers Corner and Bumpass sound like the punchline of a filthy joke.

But Hooker, Oklahoma was obviously named after all the crochet enthusiasts who founded the town, and Blue Ball Village was founded by racquetball enthusiasts, right? *wink*

See The Lewdest Town Names In America here

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Napoléon Bonaparte, Failed Novelist

Did you know that Napoléon Bonaparte tried his hand at fiction before he became a revolutionary? Well, if Saddam Hussein could write a romance novel, why not Napoléon? In 2007, a French publishing company found (and published) a novella written by Napoléon, and now a few pages of the original manuscript is going up for auction.

Clisson et Eugénie is unabashedly autobiographical. Penned in the autumn of 1795, while Napoleon was still rising in the ranks of the French army, the novel centers around an officer named Clisson, “a man of fervent imagination, with his blazing heart, his uncompromising intellect and his cool head”. The war-weary Clisson decides to quit his position and enjoy the spa baths of central France. There he meets two young women, Amélie and Eugénie, and falls desperately (and tragically) in love with Eugénie. While tender, this romance is also quite tame. The closest the author comes to sex may be: “Their hearts fused … the most exquisite voluptuousness flooded the hearts of the two enraptured lovers.”

The novella only runs about 22 scribbled pages, so the plot swiftly progresses from love to marriage to melancholy.

Only four pages will go to auction; the rest are in a museum or single pages in private collections. Napoléon wrote the story when he was 26 years old, and it very well may have been a kind of self-therapy, as it was based on a woman he knew and loved. Think about how history may have been different if he had found success as a novelist! Read more about Clisson et Eugénie at the Guardian. -Thanks, John Farrier!  

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The New Star Wars Canon Presents a Fascinating Paradox of Storytelling

Everything changed when Disney bought Lucasfilm and all the Star Wars properties. At first we were excited, because that meant that we’d get more Star Wars movies, while feeling apprehensive, because we didn’t want it to turn into Mickey Mouse. Then Disney announced that the "expanded universe" of novels, games, and fan fiction up to that point were not to be regarded as canon, which startled fans. What were they thinking? They were thinking of unifying all Star Wars lore. And that in itself raises many questions.

When Lucasfilm was purchased by Disney, the decision was made that anything that advances the Star Wars story would become part of the same singular canon. Books, comics, games—they’re now as definitive as TV and film. Anything you pick up related to Star Wars adds to the whole; there’s a group of executives called the Lucasfilm Story Group whose sole job is to make sure all of these moving parts come together in a cohesive way.

As a Star Wars fan, I can’t think of anything more exciting than it all having a purpose. The amazing fact that we’re finally finding out what happened to Luke Skywalker, Princess Leia, and Han Solo (RIP) after Return of the Jedi is just the icing on the cake. Now, every single bit of Star Wars out there gives us another piece of the puzzle. You can go to the store, pick up Marvel’s Star Wars comic, and read crucial pieces of Star Wars history. Did you ever wonder how Darth Vader would’ve reacted between when he realized Obi-Wan Kenobi hid his son from him? Well, that happens in the comics—and it was a result of Luke Skywalker meeting Boba Fett, if you can believe it.

At the same time, longtime fans are having a time shifting from a malleable fictional universe to a concrete universe, and newer fans wonder if you really have to buy all those comic books to learn what’s going on. The pros, cons, and questions about Disney’s new approach to Star Wars are laid out for your reading pleasure at io9.

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Profile for John Farrier

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