There’s nothing a tortoise likes better than a fresh tomato -just ask any tomato gardener! Kevin is no exception, but he desperately needs a teeny little pair of tortoiseshell glasses. He has terrible depth perception. The poor thing does get a bit or two eventually. -via Buzzfeed

It's often said that timing is everything, but for Australia's Murray short-necked turtles, hatching together is a matter of life or death. The turtle eggs coordinate their hatching so they find safety in numbers at their most vulnerable age.

But how do the eggs coordinate their hatchings? Turns out, unhatched eggs can communicate with one another:

Although all the eggs were laid at the same time, in the same nest, they experience radically different environments. Those at the top of the nest, buried in warmer sun-soaked soil, can be up to six degrees Celsius warmer than those at the bottom. That’s a problem because the embryos develop at different rates depending on how hot they are. Given the gradient of warmth in the nest, the topmost turtles should hatch well before their siblings at the bottom.

That’s not what happens. Ricky-John Spencer from the University of Western Sydney has found that the Murray River turtles can tell whether their clutch-mates are more or less advanced, and shift the pace of their own development accordingly. If their peers are racing ahead, they can play catch-up.

Link

Reptangles -  $24.95

Are you looking for a fun and fantastic way to teach your child about geometric transformations or how to build complex polyhydra? You need Reptangles from the NeatoShop.  This vibrant toy comes with 24 adorable turtle-shaped reptangles that snap and slide together in over 100 ways.  This is math made fun!

Be sure to check out the NeatoShop for more brain boosting Toys & Games!

Link

An underwater wedding ceremony yesterday at the London Aquarium drew the attention of a turtle who came forward to object to the union of this man and this woman. Or maybe he just objected to the the couple trespassing in his territory. Or possibly he just wanted a bite of that delicious wedding dress! -via Buzzfeed

Joy is watching a turtle (red-eared slider?) dancing to "Satisfaction" by Benny Benassi. All you need is a happy tortoise, a toothbrush, and some electro house music!

Hit play or go to Link [YouTube] – via Milk and Cookies

Is this turtle wearing additional protection or just a convenient disguise? The kitten doesn’t know what to do with a walking step stool! -via Arbroath

Poor turtle – it’s probably not going to survive into adulthood, but while it’s alive, let’s give it a little bit of love. Here’s Cyclop Turtle – hit play or go to Link [YouTube] – via Geekosystem

The shell of one early meiolaniid species, known from fossils recovered in South America and named Stupendemys for its size, was 11 feet long and seven feet wide. The more modern Meiolania platyceps, found in Australia and Melanesia, had a relatively small five-foot-diameter shell, and weighed an estimated half-ton. All had armored club tails and horned heads.

(One species is even named Ninjemys, in honor of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, though M. platyceps looks much more like Super Mario Brothers 3-vintage Bowser, the King Koopa).

According to the fossil record, Meiolania damelipi flourished 3,000 years ago and were extinct 200 years later, possibly because of human hunting. The size of the newly-discovered species is not specified in the article. Pictured is Meiolania platyceps. Link -via Unique Daily

(Image credit: Australian National Museum)

You can no longer say you’ve never seen a tortoise dance. -via reddit

Two days after Maddie Tibble and her family moved to a new house, their family pet, a tortoise named Lottie, escaped. Two years later, they found the runaway tortoise … one and a half mile away from home!

Doubtless a hare could have made the journey across the fields and down nearby Blackshots Lane in a matter of minutes. But Lottie took her time and spent 22 months to emerge into the open and be spotted by a animal-friendly passer-by.

Vet Lizzie Rigby, 36, checked Lottie over and gave her a clean bill of health. She said: ‘We looked her over and then checked for a microchip with a scanner and she had one. ‘We then contacted the chip company to get the owner’s detailed and found she had been missing for two years. We were amazed, considering she was in such good nick.’

Miss Rigby added: ‘Tortoises are quite slow, she didn’t get very far, who knows where she has been? ‘She must have found somewhere to curl up and hibernate for the winter. We were very surprised because the last winter was so cold but she survived.’

If you do the math, you’ll come up with 0.00009 mph: Link

It’s Woodward the tortoise against a rabbit named Lady Bunbun. How the winner is declared can be a point of controversy, but as you will see, the old fable is true. The tortoise keeps a steady pace while the hare barely shows up. -via Buzzfeed

We’ve seen a cat riding a Roomba. Now here’s a soft-shelled turtle doing it. He doesn’t appear to enjoy it as much.

via Geekologie

Depending on the crowd, four to five of these exciting turtle races are held every Saturday night around 10 p.m. Every drink purchased gets the buyer one raffle ticket. Come race time, the tickets are drawn to see who is assigned as an honorary jockey to each of the six turtles. (The turtles, by the way, have clever names like Salisbury Strutter, Bermusa and Butkus.)

First place gets a T-shirt that reads “My turtle got lucky at Bucky’s,” and last place gets a complimentary shot. In some cases, coming in last place is probably harder than coming in first.

The only person to actually handle the turtles is a licensed reptile handler. Link -via Buzzfeed

(image credit: Wendy Rose Gould)

Like its name says, This is Why You’re Fat website is dedicated to chronicling the brave culinary concoctions guaranteed to give you a coronary by day’s end. I think I’ve gained a few pounds just looking at the photos, and therefore can’t wait to show my latest find: the Bacon Cheese Turtleburgers!

Details at Interwebs Randomness and Other Inspiring Tales – via This is Why You’re Fat

I don’t know what’s really going on in this picture, but “turtle wax” was my first reaction. Link -via Buzzfeed

Who says turtles are slow? This strange-looking soft shell turtle made a quick getaway! -via Unique Daily

He was so hot he ‘phfizzed’ when firefighters put him in water – and then poked his head out.

‘The firemen said he was steaming when they put him in the bucket of water and he was so hot they couldn’t pick him up,’ said Ms Smith, 27.

‘It’s a miracle he is OK – especially when you see the state of the cage.’

Vets kept him in overnight and Shelli is now nibbling cucumber again.

Link -via Arbroath

The shell itself is made from broadened and flattened ribs, fused to parts of the turtle’s backbone (so that unlike in cartoons, you couldn’t pull a turtle out of its shell). The shoulder blades sit underneath this bony case, effectively lying within the turtle’s ribcage. In all other back-boned animals, whose shoulder blades sit outside their ribs (think of your own back for a start). The turtle’s torso muscles are even more bizarrely arranged.

Ed Yong looks at turtle anatomy and how this weird configuration evolved from the basic vertebrate plan. Link

I met a ferocious turtle once. Turns out it was just hungry … Actually, the sign above is an ingenious direct mail campaign by SulAmérica, a provider of home insurance. The company has a very unusual database of what pets their clients own.

Sun/MRM ad agency of Brazil engineered a clever direct mail campaign, where they send funny signs to people who have birds, turtles, ferrets but no watch dogs to protect their homes! With this customized campaign, over 85% of the people renewed their insurance (as compared to 30% the year before the campaign).

Link

It looks like another day in the park until … snap, the turtle has the pigeon, drags it underwater, and a few token feathers float back to the surface. Turtles might looks slow, but beware.

From the Upcoming ueue, submitted by Urbanist.