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Human Turd Scale

Alex — Tue, 03 Aug 2010 02:42:21 +0000

If you ever wondered exactly how much you poop every day, then this invention is for you: the human turd scale. Yes, you read that right: a scale that weighs your excrement.

United States patent 1493222 is for "A weighing device especially adapted for weighing feces as excreted." Simply put, the patent is for a toilet outfitted with a turd scale in the bowl. A person seats themselves on the toilet, does their "business," and just like stepping on a traditional scale, takes a deep breath and hopes the number that registers at the top of the toilet bowl does not betray the number they’ve been praying for.

InventorSpot has more: Link

Thief Identified Through His Turd

Alex — Thu, 03 Sep 2009 22:12:04 +0000

This has got to be one of the strangest police investigations ever. Detectives in Valencia County, New Mexico, identified a possible suspect by extracting DNA from a very unusual piece of evidence left by the thief: his own turd!

"He ate their food and drank the drinks they had," said Valencia County Sheriff Rene Rivera.

The thief used the bathroom and left his solid waste on display for the homeowner. "It’s more of an insult right there. It was a big slap in the face," the homeowner said.

That same type of evidence was found at several different burglary scenes. The detectives on the case said they used the thief’s calling card against him. The feces went into evidence and the state crime lab extracted DNA from it. "We ended up getting a hit," Rivera said.

Good work, CSI Valencia County! Link – via Dave Barry’s Blog

Man Fights City Hall … With Signage

Alex — Tue, 13 Jan 2009 05:19:18 +0000

Anthony Herman is fighting City Hall, and he’s not shy about it: the used car salesman used all weapons at his disposal including his business signage which he used to call out the Mayor and the Polk City councilmen:

Herman contends Polk City for years has harassed him with zoning violations, tied him up with lawyers and sent squad cars to deliver letters to his Johnston home in a bid to embarrass him. Polk City, for its part, has alleged that Herman ran an illegal salvage operation from 300 Sandpiper Court and routinely dumped vehicle fluids into the city’s storm sewers.

The dispute, which spills through five Polk County court files, turned nasty last fall, when the Mighty Good sign for three days described Polk City Mayor Gary Heuertz as "a lieing little Nazi turd."

The commentary returned last week, when Herman’s sign began telling Polk City residents that "Our mayor and council sure are ass holes."

City leaders say Herman’s messages have drawn complaints from some residents – mostly parents who came across them while transporting small, reading-age children – but insist that the city has no plans to try to interfere with his right to free speech.

"A lot of people are coming out of the woodwork to look at it," Heuertz said of the sign. "So tourism’s not a problem … .

Link – via Arbroath

(Photo: Rodney White/The Register)

Shikito the Turd Toy

Alex — Fri, 02 Jan 2009 08:42:25 +0000

It doesn’t get much stranger than this, folks: Here’s SHIKITO in Brown, which from what I can gather is a cute little turd-shaped vinyl mascot figure by Superdeux from STRANGEco.

The "Lauda Shikito Salvatorem" byline in the backside (where else?) of the cute lil’ turd means "All Praise Shikito the Savior!" Link