The best way to deal with not having a sweetheart on Valentine’s Day is to have a sense of humor about it. If you’re at all familiar with the “forever alone” meme, you know that it’s all in fun, and nothing is forever. With that in mind, Ranker has collected the 40 best images about how those who are “forever alone” deal with the most romantic of holidays. Link

But when McKinley took office in 1897, he didn’t hide Ida from view. Instead, defying the protocol of the day, he insisted that his wife be seated beside him at state dinners, so he could help if a seizure struck, or cover her face with a hankerchief to ward off an impending attack.

And when President McKinley was fatally shot in 1901, his thoughts were of fragile Ida, whispering to his secretary: “My wife—be careful…how you tell her.”

Read all ten of these stories at Smithsonian magazine. Link

This Valentine’s Day supercut is the perfect way to make the object of your affection go all gushy inside, in case you want to send it to someone you love. It worked for me! This was edited as a labor of love by Matthew Belinkie, who tells about how he selected and organized the clips at his website. Link -via mental_floss

Sometimes it’s better to just not open a can of worms, especially if you’re not going to believe his answer anyway. This image is from a collection of Relationship Public Service Announcements from College Humor. Link -via Buzzfeed

All over the world, people show their feelings of love to each other in their own ways. Kien Lam (previously at Neatorama) made a special Valentine’s Day video to remind us how universal the expression of love really is. He has more information about the video at his website. Link

If you’re measuring by way of divorce, the myth of the seven year itch may not be a myth after all; according to the 2009 U.S. Census Bureau, the median duration of first marriages that end in divorce is 7.9 years.

Like the Oddee one, there are no naughty pictures, but it still might be something you won’t want to read at work.

Link

(Video Link)

Just in time for Valentine’s Day, these kitties want to show us just how to celebrate the upcoming holiday. Isn’t love beautiful?

Via I Can Has Cheezburger

A lot of guys love their cars, but one man has found true love in his cherry red 1998 Monte Carlo. And by "love," I mean the kissing, romantic kind.

From TLC's TV Series My Strange Addiction:

Nathaniel admits he can't go longer than 24 hours without seeing Chase, and that it sometimes brings him to tears to be away from the car. He even has a picture of Chase as his screensaver at work to get him through the day.

But this isn't just a car owner really loving his car -- Nathaniel goes on dates with his car, goes outside to kiss it first thing in the morning and is even intimate with it. He strokes Chase lovingly, gives Chase long bubble baths and even buys Chase birthday gifts.

Looking for something really different to give your loved one this Valentine’s Day? How about a roach?

How better to express your appreciation for that special someone than to name one of the Bronx Zoo’s 58,000 Madagascar hissing cockroach after them? Best of all, when you purchase this everlasting gift, you’ll help support the Wildlife Conservation Society and its five parks in New York City.

Ok, so technically, it might not be the most romantic gift, but it’s certainly something that won’t soon be forgotten, which is more than you can say about a dozed roses.

Link Via The Mary Sue

Love Rat – $4.95

Are you still searching for the perfect Valentine’s Day gift? Look no further! Get the one you love a Love Rat from the NeatoShop. This adorable rat, with printed heart design, is also a squeaky toy. Your sweetheart will be floored by your thoughtfulness.

Be sure to check out the NeatoShop for more great Valentine’s Day ideas!

Link

In Ovid’s story of Pyramus and Thisbe, two young lovers, forbidden to marry because of family rivalries whisper their forbidden love through cracks in the wall. Their story met its fateful end when the lovers decided to escape their families, and meet under a mulberry tree. Thisbe arrived at the rendezvous first, and narrowly escaped a lion attack, dropping her distinctive veil in the process. When Pyramus arrives and finds the blood soaked veil, he throws himself on his sword; when Thisbe returns to the scene, she does the same.

Does that plot sound familiar? Pyramus and Thisbe are considered to be the inspiration for Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet. There are several more stories in the post, plus links about places connected with the tragic lovers. Link

I have no idea how the gentleman in question managed to smuggle this Pokemon card into the rest of the deck what with the giant diamond ring attached to it and all, but however he did it, the proposal idea is certainly impressive.

Link Via The Daily What

A misdirected email connects two people 9,000 miles apart who turn out to share more than the same name. This is the latest animation from the Rauch Brothers for StoryCorps. How do they find such great stories? This is one that is included in StoryCorps new book All There Is: Love Stories from StoryCorps which will be available February 2. Link

If you’re married, you’ve almost certainly misplaced your wedding ring at one place or another and even if you’ve never actually lost it, you probably know someone else who has. After all, a little band of gold or platinum is pretty easy to lose track of, even if it is important to hold on to. But while many people lose their rings, it’s pretty rare to actually find them again. Even so, it has been known to happen. Here are some of the most amazing stories of people who have lost their wedding or engagement rings, only to find them again.

Image Via Jason Pier in DC [Flickr]

Hidden in Some Weeds

Anthea Capewell lost her wedding ring and engagement ring in 1976, when they fell off her finger as she closed her garden gate. After a long and thorough search, she and her husband could only find the engagement ring. Eight years later, the couple moved out of the house, which is why it was even more amazing that 33 years after the ring was lost, Anthea received a call from her old neighbor who claimed to have found the ring. The neighbors discovered the ring buried in some weeds underneath a hedge that was shared by the two homes.

The discovery was such a pleasant surprise for the couple that Anthea and her husband immediately decided to renew their wedding vows in the next year.

In An Old Toilet

In 1974, a year after Donna Claver was married, the pregnant woman set her engagement ring on the tank lid of her toilet while she put lotion on. Unfortunately, the ring slipped into the bowl. Despite Donna and husband Terry’s best efforts, including unbolting the toilet and shaking it vigorously, the ring was stuck inside the hole at the bottom of the bowl and couldn’t be removed. Because the couple was too poor to afford a new toilet, they eventually gave up and put the fixture back in place, expecting to never retrieve their lost ring.

As the years went by, the Clavers moved out of the home and it was sold over and over, but just last year, Terry happened to be roofing a house across the street from his old home when he noticed the new owners carrying the toilet to the trash. Remembering his wife’s lost ring, Terry climbed off the roof and told the gentlemen he’d be happy to throw the toilet away for them. He then took the fixture to his shop and broke it with a sledgehammer. Finally, the ring was free.

Amazingly, after a little cleaning, the ring still looked brand new 36 years later.

In a Dog Food Bag

Toy surprises are usually reserved for cereals and Cracker Jack boxes, that’s why when Krista Berg discovered a man’s wedding ring in the bag of NutroMax she bought for her pup Otto, she figured it wasn’t meant as a bonus gift. Whereas most people would probably invoke the law of finder’s keepers, Krista decided to call around. When no one at the dog food plant had lost their ring, she tried calling the store where she bought the food and got in touch with Mike Stoddard, the rightful owner of the wedding ring. Mike was glad that Krista found his ring and not someone else, noting, “most people would just keep it.”

In a Garbage Truck

When 77 year-old Bridget Pericolo put her wedding and engagement rings into a Dixie cup for safe keeping, she certainly didn’t expect the adventure that followed. It all started when her husband thought the cup was trash and tossed it away with the rest of the garbage.

Unfortunately, by that time, the local trash truck had already come by and collected the couple’s garbage bags. Bridget immediately called the local sanitation department, only to have the supervisor tell her that the truck couldn’t be stopped until the end of their route.

At the end of the day, Bridget’s husband Angelo met up with the two drivers of the truck and sifted through the entire truck of garbage, over ten tons worth, until they discovered the bag from the Pericolo’s house. After about 45 minutes of searching, Angelo returned to his wife of 55 years with a smile on his face and a ring in his hand.

On a Carrot

Lena Pahlsson was in the middle of an epic baking session, just before Christmas of 1995, when she removed her ring and placed it on the kitchen counter. At some point during the day, the ring disappeared and Lena and her husband, Ola, looked everywhere for the lost jewelry item. When they remodeled their kitchen a few years later, they even took the opportunity to search behind all the appliances and under the floorboards to no avail. Finally, the couple gave up hope on ever finding the ring.

Sixteen years after the ring disappeared, Lena was outside, pulling up the last of the carrots in her garden when she noticed something strange about one of the carrots. The tiny vegetable had a strange thing wrapped around it. When she looked a little closer, Lena realized the carrot had grown inside of her wedding band. After a quick cleaning, the white gold band adorned with diamonds looks as good as new again.

While no one knows for sure how the ring ended up in the garden, Ola has a few theories. “We thought maybe it had fallen in to the compostable food bin. Perhaps it ended up in compost that was spread over the vegetable patch later,” he said. Alternatively, he has speculated that maybe the family’s sheep, known for sneaking in and munching on the family’s kitchen scraps, had a hand in the disappearance.

At the Bottom of Some Sea Baths

The Dawn Fraser Baths are a tidal flow salt water pool in Australia, unlike normal pools, this means these baths are filled with salt water and silt, making it hard to find anything lost in the bottom. Fortunately for Joanne Norman, who lost her engagement ring while playing water polo at the baths, scuba diver Brad Lovell was available for hire.

She tried to find the ring herself, but noted, “the bottom of the ocean pool was covered in silt and constantly moving. We tried to find it but with the (fading) light we were forced to give up.” Joanne tried hiring a few local salvage divers to look for the ring, but she had no luck until she got in touch with Mr. Lovell. That’s because Brad incorporates a metal detector into his salvage diving to help him find specific items underwater.

Brad got the idea for his business as he used a metal detector on the beach and was often interrupted by divers and swimmers asking him to help them find something they lost in the shallows. His idea to combine the practice with scuba diving has proven quite fruitful as he has since been hired to find a number of items lost under the ocean’s surface including the wedding ring of world surfing champion Layne Beachley. “The gratification I feel when reuniting people with a lost engagement or wedding ring is indescribable,” he says.

In the Mud of A Dirty Harbor

Just like Joanne Norman, ecologist Aleki Taumoepeau lost his rings in murky ocean water. In Taumoepeau’s case, he was searching the waters of New Zealand for invasive plant species. When the ring disappeared in water ten feet deep, Aleki tossed his anchor overboard to help him mark the spot. He recorded the area and then returned to his wife of three years who offered to buy him a new ring. “I just said ‘No, I’ll find it,’” he said.

Three months later, he returned to the location and searched for the ring –to no avail. He then returned again, over a year later, and dared to dive into the freezing waters during the area’s winter season. Finally, he spotted his old anchor and then immediately saw the ring. “I couldn’t believe that I could see the ring so perfectly,” he said, “the whole top surface of the ring was glowing.”

As you may have guessed, Aleki’s ability to spot a “glowing” ring in the normally murky waters of New Zealand has earned him a new nickname amongst his friends…that’s right, he’s now the “Lord of the Ring.”

Image Via tata_aka_T [Flickr]

Have any of you lost your wedding rings? Did you end up finding them again? If so, do you have a tale that can rival these stories?

Shakespearan Love Mug

“Doubt that the stars are fire,
doubt that the sun doth move,
doubt truth to be a liar,
but never doubt I love.”

William Shakespeare had a lot to say about love, and many of those things are right here on the Shakespearan Love Mug from the NeatoShop. What a great gift to express your feelings for Valentine’s Day! Or anytime at all, if you want to be really classy. The Shakespeare Mug is just one of many message mugs for all occasions at the NeatoShop. Order yours today!

Link

Paul’s birthday gift to Emma is a story told in picture book fashion. It starts off slow but gets really interesting as it goes along. I hope Emma liked it as much as I did! -via Nag on the Lake

A couple having an intimate dinner conversation don’t realize they are being monitored. A short film by Marko Slavnic. -via Everlasting Blort

Terry Border of Bent Objects presents his “first good sized” animation. It’s a love story! Link -via Everlasting Blort

Previously: An interview with Terry Border.

Few things are as awwwwwww-inspiring as an elderly couple in puppy love. Olivia Gissing has a photoblog entitled Old People Holding Hands devoted to this theme. Link -via Bit Rebels

Geeky-themed weddings are always fun and I have seen my share of superhero, Renaissance and Star Wars weddings around the blogosphere, I hadn’t seen many Harry Potter weddings until now. Fortunately, The Mary Sue has a great round up of these adorable occasions and the photos are simply adorable.

Link

I love Men in Uniform Tote Bag – $14.95

Are you looking for the perfect summer tote bag?  You need the I Love Men in Uniform Tote Bag from the NeatoShop.  This great canvas bag with gusseted bottom will serve as a warning to all mortal men. Only marvelous characters need apply.

I Love Men in Uniform Mug also available.

Be sure to check out the NeatoShop for more super Bags & Totes!

Link

Be warned, if you tend to cry after watching emotionally-charged moments, this article (particularly the videos) might have you spraying your computer with tears. I know I was misty-eyed while writing it.

1. Borderlands

I have to admit, this just might be my favorite wedding proposal ever. Ben and his girlfriend, Tora, were both seriously addicted to the popular Gearbox RPG shooter Borderlands. That’s why when Ben decided to ask Tora to marry him, he decided to ask Gearbox for help popping the question. The company’s response was more positive than Ben ever could have hoped for, as they spent a week working on a special Borderlands-themed wedding proposal video for the couple. It even featured a few hilarious quips from the robot character, Claptrap.

Ben got all of Tora’s friends and family members together under the guise of throwing her a birthday party and unveiled the video by saying he got a hold of a new Borderlands trailer. Needless to say, after watching the video, Tora’s response was a big fat “yes,” although she did later admitted that she was a little upset that Ben got to go to the Gearbox studio without her.

Video links #1 and #2

2. Mario

This guy and his girlfriend both seriously love Mario (if you couldn’t tell already by looking at the room) so in order to ask his girlfriend to marry him, he set up a functional Mario question mark box that would drop the ring when she hit it with her head. While the set up is exactly as geeky as you might expect, it’s surprisingly emotionally touching when she tries to hold back her tears as she jumps to hit the box.

Video link

3. Bejeweled

If your girlfriend loves the game Bejeweled and you happen to be a software programmer, you can do something above and beyond if you’re so inclined. Or at least, that’s what Bernie Peng did when he decided to propose, using his programming skills to create a custom Bejeweled game. Once the score got high enough, the regular screen would clear out and a ring would appear on the DS screen. Bernie then dropped to one knee and presented her with a pink ring that looked like it belonged in the game.

As if the story weren’t great enough on its own, the company that makes Bejeweled was so impressed by Bernie’s proposal that they offered to pay for the couple’s honeymoon and they volunteered to supply all of the wedding guests with a free version of Bejeweled. Now that’s a great way to capitalize on the publicity of the wedding proposal!

4. Google Maps

Michael Weiss-Malik’s girlfriend already agreed to marry him during a low-key, at home proposal, but Michael felt the occasion needed more pizazz, so he moved on to his proposal 2.0 plan, which involved a hot tip he learned at work. Did I mention Michael works at Google?

When the Google Street View car was set to drive by the company’s headquarters, everyone was invited to go outside and wave at the car, but Michael opted to do something even more memorable. He dressed in some kind of animal costume and stood outside holding a banner that read “Proposal 2.0 Marry Me Leslie!!”

Then, instead of emailing her the link directly, he asked internet users to email her and tell her why she should marry Michael or to link to his website that included the Google Street View scene.

5. Muppets

Anyone can order a custom Muppet doll to propose for them, but Sid Ceaser decided to go one step further by making a three minute long, professional-looking video staring Muppets made to look like him and his girlfriend. He then brought her to the movies where the proposal film was played before the feature presentation. When she said yes, the lights came on, revealing that her friends and family made up the entire theater audience.

Video link

6. Light Writing

Light Writing Proposal from Derick Childress on Vimeo.

Light graffiti involves using lights and a camera to “tag” a building or other surface. Usually, it’s taken close up in one long-exposure shot, but when one photographer decided to use the technique to ask his girlfriend to marry him, the production got pretty massive pretty fast. In order to spell out “Emily Will You Marry Me?” the photographer decided to shoot the massive light letters from a high vantage point that would show a huge chunk of downtown Raleigh.

After scouting out the perfect building, he rented a hotel room there and had his friends help him shoot the images and throw out the lights to create the writing. The process was incredibly tedious and technical, but if you want to learn more about how it was done, his website has a lot more information. If you don’t care about the technical side of things, the video shows all you need to know…how the lights spelled out his message.

Video link

7. LOL Cats

I Can Has Cheezburger played a critical role in this marriage proposal, where a man used photos of his cat and ICHC’s classic LOL builder to create a one-of-a-kind proposal that went on the site’s front page. When she gave her answer, they added a few captioned pics of the girl with her kitty to the post so everyone knew she gave a resounding “afurrmitive” to the question.

8. Comics

As a freelance artist who has worked on a number of major comic books, Leigh Gallagher knew he didn’t spend enough time at home or give his girlfriend nearly enough attention. That’s why he made sure his proposal comics were filled with heart-filled confessions, humor and an unbelievable attention to detail. Despite his self-confessed flaws, the comics made one thing abundantly clear: Leigh is one heck of a catch.

If all the touchy-feeliness of this article has gotten to you and you want to read about a few proposals that haven’t gone this smoothly, then you might want to check out this older Neatorama article featuring 14 Romantic Gestures Gone Terribly Wrong.

Of course, if you are feeling the emotions here, feel free to share your own proposal stories in the comments!

Ah, love – the ultimate in human feelings that conquers all … or is it? Thanks to MRI studies, scientists have dissected the various brain regions that get activated when you feel passionate as well as other types of love.

Scientific American has the details:

Men and women can now thank a dozen brain regions for their romantic fervor. Researchers have revealed the fonts of desire by comparing functional MRI studies of people who indicated they were experiencing passionate love, maternal love or unconditional love. Together, the regions release neuro­transmitters and other chemicals in the brain and blood that prompt greater euphoric sensations such as attraction and pleasure. Conversely, psychiatrists might someday help individuals who become dangerously depressed after a heartbreak by adjusting those chemicals.

Passion also heightens several cognitive functions, as the brain regions and chemicals surge. “It’s all about how that network interacts,” says Stephanie Ortigue, an assistant professor of psychology at Syracuse University, who led the study. The cognitive functions, in turn, “are triggers that fully activate the love network.” Tell that to your sweetheart on Valentine’s Day.

Link – via Nerdcore

John and Sandra have an everyday love story, but it’s the kind of love story that we all want. And it makes a great little movie. -via The Daily What

Sean Ohlenkamp, an associate creative director from Toronto, Canada, placed a folder on the desktop of his wife’s computer to celebrate their third anniversary.

via Nerdcore

Herbie and Jabby have formed a mutual admiration society. Hang on, this just gets cuter as it goes! -via Buzzfeed

She loves playing Dungeons & Dragons, but she wants more. Can true love drag a nerd out of the basement long enough for a dinner date? The animation by Brad Jonas accompanies a song by the Doubleclicks. -Thanks, A Seventy!

The weather is still a bit frightful, but your girlfriend is so delightful.  Show her how much you care with the I Heart Nerds – Hello Kitty Scarf from the NeatoShop.  Seriously, if she didn’t love nerds you would be in so much trouble.

Be sure to check out the NeatoShop for more fabulously fun accessories.

]]> http://www.neatorama.com/2011/02/24/i-heart-nerds-hello-kitty-scarf/feed/ 0 http://www.neatorama.com/2011/02/11/the-8-most-romantic-creatures-in-the-animal-kingdom/ http://www.neatorama.com/2011/02/11/the-8-most-romantic-creatures-in-the-animal-kingdom/#comments Fri, 11 Feb 2011 13:22:35 +0000 Jill Harness http://www.neatorama.com/?p=41678 While humans are not biologically programmed to be monogamous (only 3% of all mammals are), our social structure is largely based around romantic partnerships. To celebrate our own romantic attachments, lets reflect on some of nature’s most loving couples.

Albatrosses

If you’re looking for the animal mating ritual that most closely resembles human dating, don’t look to primates, even mammals, instead, check out the albatross. These massive seabirds take a long time to reach sexual maturity –up to 10 years in some species, but they certainly don’t make up for it by rushing into a relationship. When they first start coming to the breeding colonies, young birds sit back and learn from their elders, observing the specie’s elaborate mating rituals that include dancing, preening, staring, pointing, and vocalizations. After years of trial and error, the birds learn to participate in these mating rituals. They will then start dancing with many partners, but year after year, they will trim down their dance card until they have selected the one partner they want to be with for the rest of their lives.

Once the partner is chosen, the pair will develop their own unique language comprised of bits of their mating ritual. Interestingly, once they have mated, they will never use most of the ritual again. While it seems like a massive undertaking, egg laying and chick rearing is a major time investment for albatrosses and the couples do everything they can to ensure they will be a successful mating pair.

Source

Great Hornbills

While most birds are monogamous, few are quite as dependent on their mates as the female hornbill is on the male. The couple gets in the mood by singing duets together. The male starts the tune, then the female jumps in and the calls then join in unison. The pair will occupy a large nest inside the hollow of a massive tree. Once the eggs are laid and fertilized, the female will then seal herself in the nest. The male will then provide food for her and her chicks through a small hole in the nest. This goes on for about two months, then the female will leave the nest, sealing up the chicks inside. The mother and father will then take turns bringing the chicks food until they are grown enough to break the seal and survive on their own.

Source

Lovebirds

Of course lovebirds belong on this list, just look at their name. But what makes this specific parrot species so darn romantic that they are often given as wedding presents to symbolize the couple’s lifelong commitment to one another? Like most birds, lovebirds are monogamous, but its their habit of sitting beside another and cuddling that has made them such a strong image of love. Their tight pairings led the ancient Greeks to believe the birds would die if they lost their mates.

The peach-faced lovebirds find a partner when they are two months old. The female fluffs up her feathers to tell the male that she is interested and he then starts to perform a courtship dance that involves bobbing his head and scratching her head.

Once the couple lays eggs, the female will incubate the nest while the male goes out to get her food. When the chicks hatch, the dad gets the food, feeds it to the mother who then regurgitates the meal for the chicks.

Sources: #1 and #2

Brolgas

All cranes are monogamous and they all have their own intricate mating dances, but the brogla’s are particularly fascinating. They mate with their partners every year, often in the same nesting area, but no matter how long they’ve been together, they always keep the passion flowing, performing their intricate mating dance every year. Just how complex is this ritual? Well, there is a reason it is considered the most elaborate mating dance in the animal kingdom.

The dances generally start with a bird picking up a clump of grass and tossing it in the air and catching it in its mouth. Then the dance starts to involve jumping, extending wings, stretching bowing, walking calling and head bobbing. Sometimes only one bird will dance, sometimes a pair will dance together, in other situations, the whole colony will jump in, starting up a massive brogla dance club.

Sources: #1 and #2

Seahorses

You may already know that male seahorses are the ones who carry the litter, but did you know they go through an intimate courtship first? They hold tails, swim snout to snout and change colors to show one another that they are ready for romance. This process can last for days before the pair engages in a courtship dance that lasts up to eight hours.

Once the male is pregnant, the female sticks around until he gives birth. She visits him every morning, holding his tail, changing colors and flirting with him to ensure that he will continue to nurture the eggs until they hatch.

Source Image via San Diego Shooter [Flickr]

Garden Snails

These slimy garden pests may not seem too romantic, particularly when you consider the fact that they are hermaphrodites, but they just may have inspired the Greek tales of cupid. Although snails are hermaphrodites, they require another partner to lay eggs. Their courtship process largely comes down to the animals circling one another and firing off “love darts” at each other, one third of which miss the target. The mucus-covered darts stimulate the animal’s female reproductive organs so they can hold more sperm. Once the darts are in place, the partners trade sperm cells for as long as six hours.

Next time you hear stories of the arrow-shooting cherub, just imagine a giant snail shooting darts before copulation. For some reason it’s just not as good of a Valentine’s Day card though.

Source Image via nutmeg66 [Flickr]

Prairie Voles

Most rodents are far from romantic, but the prairie vole is one of a handful of monogamous creatures that fall under the title. The male voles will move in with their first girlfriend and stick with her for the rest of their lives. During mating season, they will mark their territory and defend it from any trespassers by chattering its teeth and raising its arms. The male is particularly aggressive towards females who attempt to enter the territory and will even attack potential home wreckers. The happy couple will not only share pup-raising, but also groom each other and huddle together for warmth.

Sources: #1 and #2

Bonobos

While the other animals on this list are romantic in their monogamous relationships, bonobos are romantic in an entirely different manner. These primates copulate while facing each other and to participate in open mouth kissing. If the other creatures represent our ideal life-long bond of romance, bonobos personify our most popular forms of physical intimacy. I think it’s important we look at these factors too. After all, we don’t just fall in love, we also “make love.”

Source Image via CourtneyBolton [Flickr]

I don’t know about all of you, but this article sure put me in a romantic mood. Who needs wine and roses when you can dance like a crane, sing like an albatross and shoot love darts like a snail?

The Saint Bernard–someone who slobbers way too much, leaving their partner’s face looking like a microwaved glazed donut.

The Wrecking Ball–someone who lunges in so hard they clank their teeth against the other person’s, breaking more than the moment and possibly leaving their partner with the smile of a hockey player.

The Meat Grinder–someone who forgets (or doesn’t care) that they have braces and like a Saw film proceeds to attack their partner’s tongue and lips with their cheese grater grill.

Vlad the Impaler–someone who repeatedly shoves their Gene Simmons-sized tongue down their partner’s throat, testing their gag reflex.

Oh, there are more, which you’ll find at Geeks Are Sexy. Link

Love Ice Tray – $7.95

Tell someone how hot they make you this Valentine’s Day by giving them the Love Ice Tray from the  NeatoShop.  Winter, snow and ice be damned, because you are just burning up with desire!

Be sure to visit the NeatoShop for more Valentine’s Day gift ideas.

Are you feeling a little needy today? Do you need a little extra love and attention?  The Instant Love Inflatable Heart from the NeatoShop is here for you.  Just pop open the tin and blow yourself happy.

Be sure to check out the NeatoShop for more inflatable fun | Valentine’s Day Gifts

For example, unconditional love, such as that between a mother and a child, is sparked by the common and different brain areas, including the middle of the brain. Passionate love is sparked by the reward part of the brain, and also associative cognitive brain areas that have higher-order cognitive functions, such as body image.

Ortigue also said (or at least the article about her study said) that falling in love takes one fifth of a second. That part of the article didn’t make a lot of sense to me, but perhaps Neatoramanauts more literate in biochemistry can explain.

Link via Ace of Spades HQ | Photo by Flickr user Garry Knight used under Creative Commons license

The PBS series POV is airing a series of animations made from stories told to StoryCorps. You saw the first one here entitled Q&A last spring. The latest story involves Danny Perasa and his wife Annie, who have been in love since 1978. This animation was directed by the Rauch Brothers, on whose blog you’ll find more about the work. Warning: this will tug at your heart. You can be the first to see other StoryCorps animations on POV with a schedule posted at StoryCorps. Link -Thanks, Ali!

An award-winning story of a man and a digital camera. You might want to get a hanky ready. -via Flotsam

Engaged geeks Dale Larson and Laura La Gassa commissioned artist Yiying Lu to make their wedding invitations. Lu is best known as the creator of Fail Whale, once used extensively at Twitter. Since the wedding invitations are the opposite of fail, this design is called “Win Penguins.” Link -via Laughing Squid

“Don’t wait to find the ultimate act of love. Create the ultimate act of love.”

Link -Thanks, Abe Greenwald!

There’s just something about a man in uniform. However, most of us don’t throw ourselves at the object of our affection in such a blatant manner. The music adds a special touch to this video. -via YesButNoButYes

Bottoms Up, Rings Down!

Putting a ring inside your girl friend’s Wendy’s Frosty may seem romantic, but when you and your friends encourage her to chug it, you might just ruin the surprise. At least, that’s what happened to Reed Harris, when his girlfriend, Kaitlin Whipple, opened up her gullet and downed the contents on her Frosty, only to see her cheering crowd suddenly go blank and look at each other with worry. “I felt nothing at all,” she told Lauer. “I was racing my friends, so there was no way I was going to lose that competition.”

That’s right, Kaitlin drank her engagement ring and had to go to the hospital, where the ring was found via X-ray. Reed proposed to Kaitlin with the X-ray image of the ring in place of the actual jewelry. A few days later, with the help of plenty of fiber, the couple recovered the ring –and promptly had it cleaned!

Source: MSNBC Image via Kaitlin’s Website.

Try Chewing Next Time

Lest you think that Kaitlin is the only woman to have swallowed her diamond ring during an engagement proposal gone wrong, here’s a proposal story that “takes the cake.” Mr. Chen, a resident of China, thought it would be really romantic to bake his engagement ring into a cake to surprise his girlfriend. Chen said he was inspired by romantic comedies he’s seen, which always tends to be a bad start.

His girlfriend, Wen, was eating the cake when he bent down on his knee to propose, and then she suddenly passed out. “I realized I had just swallowed the ring with a full mouth of cake,” she said.

Chen called the police who told him to visit the hospital, where they were able to use a catheter to remove the ring. When Wen woke up, she promptly said yes.

Source: Ananova Image via Chotda [Flickr] (not the actual cake in the story)

Leaves Your Emotions Soaring

Admittedly, giving your girlfriend a balloon and then having a ring fall out when you pop it is really romantic, but I’m sure we can all see the infinite number of things that could go wrong through this method of “popping the question.” Lefkos Hajji didn’t consider all those potential problems when he had a florist hide a ring worth over $1,000 inside a balloon.

Thought the florist warned him to hold on tight to the balloon, Lefkos lost the balloon moments after leaving the shop when a gust of wind tore it from his hands. He claims he chased the balloon in his car for two days before he gave up hope. “I just watched as it went further and further into the air. I felt like such a plonker. It cost a fortune and I knew my girlfriend would kill me.”

While Lefkos may get a lot of points on the romantic scale, his inability to see the obvious dangers in this plan indicate that he may be a little short on the intelligence side. Evidence that his IQ is lower than the average bear is even stronger when you consider that the girl he is so in love with, presumably for her kindness and lovingness, refuses to speak with him until he gets her a new one. Personally, I would laugh and feel bad if my boyfriend did something like this. Of course, I think if he were to come up with a plan like this, he’d have an easy work around to prevent the danger from ever happening. –For example, this all could have been avoided if Lefkos put a note that said “will you marry me” in the balloon and then handed the girl the ring when she read the note. It’s just as sweet, not as dangerous.

Source: The Sun UK Image via Kaptain Kobold [Flickr] (not the balloon in the story)

Rejection is Better In Private

I’ve always thought that if you were going to ask a girl to marry you in front of a massive audience, you’d better know she’s going to say yes. In this situation, even if the girl says yes, you still can’t be sure she actually meant it when she had that much pressure on her to agree. Of course, not every girl will say yes no matter how much she feels pressure, as seen in the video above, where a woman rejects her prospective husband in front of a full arena and tv cameras.

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The Rejection Should Not Be Televised

Like women swallowing wedding rings, rejecting potential spouses in public is not entirely uncommon. This woman’s face tells the answer before he even asks. This could have been a really romantic moment of television, but when the girl’s obviously not into it, the result is just plain awkward…not to mention painful. This couldn’t have been good for the show’s ratings.

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Keep Your Feet On The Ground

Sometimes all it takes for a proposal to go wrong is a little too much romance. When one man proposed on top of a steep hiking trail, the girl was so excited that she managed to fall off the cliffs after excitedly saying yes. She dropped ten feet off a steep rockface (like the one seen above) and went unconscious after hitting the ground. Luckily, park police were able to fly her out of the area with a helicopter and none of her injuries were life-threatening.

Source: NY Daily News Image via Sharron McClellan [Flickr]

You Have The Right To Be An Idiot

It’s generally not a great idea to use government resources to scare the hell out of your girlfriend just so you can pop the question, but Baltimore State Delegate Jon S. Cardin is far too much of a risk-taker to heed such common sense. As such, he thought it would be a great idea to borrow a friend’s yacht and then convince local, on-duty police to raid the vessel with both boats and a helicopter, all in a strange, elaborate method of proposing to his girlfriend. Officers searched the boat and Megan Homer thought she was about to be handcuffed when Jon bent down on one knee and asked for her hand.

Unfortunately for Mr. Cardin, officials for the Baltimore Police Department asked for his explanation. The officials were furious to hear about such an abuse of police resources when the city was already strapped for resources and police were in short supply even at dangerous crime scenes. Anthony Guglielmi, the Police Department’s chief spokesman, stated “The Police Department is not in the business of renting out the helicopter and the boats for bachelor parties and birthdays. We’re in the business of upholding public safety in Baltimore.”

When Cardin actually addressed the public about the matter, he claimed the police performed a “routine safety check,” and left out the part about the helicopter. At least he promised to reimburse the city for any expenses related to the proposal.

Source: Baltimore Sun Image via Chris Hau [Flickr]

Don’t Kiss Someone To Deaf

Marriage proposals are not the only romantic gestures that go wrong of course. Even something as simple as a kiss can go very, very wrong in some situations. Take for example the Chinese woman who became partially deaf for two months after receiving a mind-numbingly passionate kiss from her lover. Somehow the kiss created pressure build up in her head so severe that her right ear drum blew out, leaving it completely deaf.

“While kissing is normally very safe, doctors advise people to proceed with caution,” said the Chinese newspaper that originally covered the story.

Source: Reuters Image via Life Photographer Alfred Eisenstaedt

The Kiss Heard Round The World

Speaking of kisses that really make an impact, it’s important to know the cultural implications of public displays of affection before you kiss someone publicly on stage. Richard Gere learned this the hard way when he managed to piss off practically everyone in India by kissing the Celebrity Big Brother winner, Shilpa Shetty, on stage during an Aids awareness rally in New Dehli. In India, it is considered obscene to publicly display any form of affection and Gere’s kissing Shetty’s hands and face were considered vulgar to those watching. Some people were so incensed by his actions that they actually burned effigies of him on the street, while protesters in other areas shouted “death to Shilpa Shetty.”

Source: BBC

Only Some Things Are Forever

Getting a life-sized portrait of your wife and children tattooed on your back might not be on most people’s to do list, but it most certainly displays a life-long commitment to your spouse. Unfortunately for Alan Jenkins, his wife was most certainly not willing to return the favor. While he was going through the 20-hour long, $1500 process of a full-back tattoo, she was busy cheating with a man who was 10-years-her-junior that she met at work. Of course, Alan didn’t find out until after the tattoo was complete, “I had it because I thought we loved each other – I feel very betrayed.” Strangely, he’s decided to not have her image removed.

His wife, Lisa, tried to defend herself by saying she never meant to fall in love with fitness instructor Kaspars Gavars and that she never wanted Alan to get the tattoo in the first place. Still, waiting for your husband to complete his tattoo before you tell him about your affair is pretty heinous.

This incident reminds me of the scene in “Born In East L.A.” where Cheech is told to remove the tattoo of a woman on someone’s back. Since he obviously can’t remove it, he draws devil horns and a mustache on the face. Maybe Alan needs to see this movie for some ideas.

Source: Daily Mail UK

Passengers Only Beyond This Point

In olden times, it was ok to walk your sweetie all the way down the tarmac just to spend the most possible time together before kissing each other goodbye, but in the days of the TSA, it’s not so simple. Personally, I thought this was pretty common knowledge, but I guess I was wrong because apparently, because one man actually shut down a whole airport for five hours just to kiss his girlfriend goodbye.

The couple remains unidentified, but I’m sure more than a few people at the airport wish they knew who was responsible for making every single passenger go through security a second time, delaying flights for hours. The TSA agent that left his post, letting the man slip into the secure area undetected, was suspended on administrative leave.

Source: Reuters Image

Only Babies Can Go Naked and Shoot People With Arrows

One of the most frequent reasons men seem to get in trouble for romantic gestures is in a strange attempt to impress a girl. While outrageous methods occasionally catch a woman’s eye, many stupid ideas not only fall flat, but also result in arrests and mayhem.

James Miller is a perfect example. This young Romeo had a bit too much to drink one night and decided that relying on cupid wasn’t good enough to take his relationship to the next level –instead, he decided, he needed to be cupid. So he took the next logical step and jumped onto the field of a soccer game dressed in only his boxers, shooting roses from an arrow at the crowd of entertained onlookers.

Naturally, he was arrested, fined and banned from any further soccer games for the next three years. Unfortunately for Miller though, his girlfriend, Jade Thompson, had quite the opposite reaction to his stunt and dumped him shortly after the incident. To make matters worse, since he’s in the military, his superior officers warned that he may even be court-martialed for the stunt.

“That sort of behavior always seems to work some romantic magic in the movies. Now I have no girlfriend and no job,” he explained outside of a courtroom hearing.

Source: Telegraph UK

Crime Doesn’t Pay or Get You Girls

What could be worse than streaking along a soccer field to impress a girl? Drunkenly stealing a plane and then crashing it into a soybean field. Michael Santos had already lost his driver’s license permanently, but that didn’t deter his desire to impress his girlfriend by showing her that he could fly a plane.

So, he drove her to the airport while drunk, broke into a plane and then managed to catch the wing on fire before he even reached the end of the taxiway. He then missed a curve in the runway veered into a soybean field and cut up a bunch of the plants with the plane’s propeller. Police estimate the damage to be around $160,000.

No word yet on whether his girlfriend actually stuck by him after this moronic stunt, but the fact that she got into the plane with her drunken boyfriend is a good indicator that she seems to lack common sense enough to dump him for this.

Source: MSNBC Image via Cranky Guy Media [Flickr] (not the actual plane involved)

Don’t Flash Cash You Don’t Have

The spirit of capitalism is alive and well in China, or at least when it comes to trying to impress women. A man in the Heilongjiang province was arrested last year after trying to impress his girlfriend by depositing a 250 million yuan ($36.5 million) check into his bank account. The only problem, the check was a fake and he bought it only so he could look cool by depositing it in front of her.

I’m sure you can guess what happened afterward; bank clerks knew the check was fake and called the police and the man was arrested. He immediately confessed that he bought the fake check for the sake of impressing his lover.

The moral here is it’s better to be poor and honest than truthful while under arrest.

Source: China Daily

What about you readers? Have any love stories from hell, or know someone else that does? Do share.

A team from the University of Pisa in Italy found the bodily chemistry which makes people sexually attractive to new partners lasts, at most, two years. [...]

The Italian researchers tested the levels of the hormones called neutrophins in the blood of volunteers who were rated on a passionate love scale.

Levels of these chemical messengers were much higher in those who were in the early stages of romance. [...]

But in people who had been with their partners for between one and two years these so-called "love molecules" had gone, even though the relationship had survived.

The scientists found that the lust molecule was replaced by the so-called "cuddle hormone" – oxytocin – in couples who had been together for several years.

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It’s great to see so much love in the animal kingdom especially when the world is so full of violence and hate. Enjoy these cute pictures of animals showing affection.

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From the Upcoming ueue, submitted by draganesku.

Link Image Via Daily Mail

Have you ever written a love letter? How did it turn out? Sappy or clever?

I betcha it’s not as awesome as this one sent about 100 years ago by William Weightman. He wrote the entire thing in rebus (for example, the word "dearest" is formed using a picture of a deer followed by the letters "est.")

That’s just one of 7 fascinating love letters in this post by Shaun Usher (the guy behind deputy dog and Letters of Note blogs)

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From the Upcoming ueue, submitted by Eavesy.

Author Alfie Kohn wrote an interesting article for The New York Times wrote about some interesting studies on conditional parenting:

In 2004, two Israeli researchers, Avi Assor and Guy Roth, joined Edward L. Deci, a leading American expert on the psychology of motivation, in asking more than 100 college students whether the love they had received from their parents had seemed to depend on whether they had succeeded in school, practiced hard for sports, been considerate toward others or suppressed emotions like anger and fear.

It turned out that children who received conditional approval were indeed somewhat more likely to act as the parent wanted. But compliance came at a steep price. First, these children tended to resent and dislike their parents. Second, they were apt to say that the way they acted was often due more to a “strong internal pressure” than to “a real sense of choice.” Moreover, their happiness after succeeding at something was usually short-lived, and they often felt guilty or ashamed.

In a companion study, Dr. Assor and his colleagues interviewed mothers of grown children. With this generation, too, conditional parenting proved damaging. Those mothers who, as children, sensed that they were loved only when they lived up to their parents’ expectations now felt less worthy as adults. Yet despite the negative effects, these mothers were more likely to use conditional affection with their own children.

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“Intimacy is important for emotional health. But good sleep is important for physical, emotional and mental health.”

What do you guys think? Would you sleep away from your love so you can actually improve your sleep?

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Cute! Link [embedded YouTube]

Though I missed this one for Pi Day, I find Andrew Le‘s take on why Love is like Pi too cute (and true) not to post!

Link Via Weird Stuff News

If you like the roses above, or just forgot about Valentine’s Day until all the roses were sold out, there’s an easy to follow instruction guide for them over on Instructables right now.

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