First it was the Arab Spring, then came revolution in the fast food empire with the latest casualty of the monarchy Burger King (the creepy King is dead, long live the creepy King).
The Smew (yes, like The Onion) reports:
Continued peaceful protests by Moncton youth and menu higher-ups alike—including Whopper Jr., long considered the heir apparent to the burger throne, and Tendercrisp Chicken, an advisor revered for his ability to see seemingly contradictory sides of any question at the same time—have led the Mountain Road Burger Monarchy to abdicate the throne, leaving the way open for the creation of a Burger Democratic Republic.
“We’ve spent hours—days, even—demanding our rights to equal burger representation, to a flat-top that expresses the needs of the people, whether they be stoned teenagers or fat, sad divorcés,” said Brad Wilkinson, 16, one of the leaders of the rebel movement. “No more will we live under the benevolent tyranny of, ‘Have it your way.’ Today, all our hard work has finally paid off.”