A Scientific Paper Explaining Superman's Powers

Ryan North of the webcomic Dinosaur Comics asked his friend Ben Tippett to write a formal paper explaining the coherency of Superman's amazing powers. It's a very math and physics-heavy article, so I won't try to understand, let alone summarize the whole thing. Here, however, is the conclusion:

We conjecture that all of Superman's powers come from His ability to alter the inertial mass of objects in His immediate vicinity or with which He is in personal contact; although the mechanism is unknown.


Link via io9

Image: flickr user chanchan222, used under Creative Commons license.

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I'm Not Convinced!
Haven't read the whole thing, just the intro/conclusion and it would appear that Superman would be a Telekinetic due to the following: "...alter the inertial mass of objects in His immediate vicinity..." Not buying it, no sir, try again.
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As it says - the mechanism is unknown... - I don;t quite know who is bored enough to explore the physics of Superman's superpowers but well, we all need to do something. Anyways, I think the analysis of the Superman's superpowers would be really interesting from the point of view of psychological projection of human desires and values into a Superbeing. That would be amazing! Would anyone here be interested?
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Many years ago I came across a book called "A Stress Analysis of a Strapless Evening Gown" which is full of this sort of thing. Just checked over at Amazon and it is back in print...
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