Britain’s Clown Shortage

By Alex in Politics on Mar 6, 2009 at 4:29 pm

The British Home Office’s effort to crack down on illegal immigrations has an unintended consequences of sort: Britain is experiencing a clown shortage!

"My season started in February," says Martin Lacey, owner of the Great British Circus, "and I’ve got comedy acrobats stranded in the Ukraine, and Mongolian horse riders who were refused their visas in Ulan Batur." The holes in his lineup have forced Lacey to draft last-minute substitutes. "Our Mexican clown is stuck in Mexico, so we’ve got a trapeze artist pretending to be a stooge just to get everybody out of trouble," he says. "It’s a mess."

And it’s totally incompatible with the needs of Britain’s circus sector. According to Malcolm Clay, secretary of the Association of Circus Proprietors of Great Britain, British circus schools don’t produce artists at an acceptable standard, largely because their students refine skills like tightrope walking or fire-breathing as a hobby, not as part of a life-long career. As a result, British circuses rely on artists from countries with long-established histories of state-sponsored circus schools: they call on Argentina and Colombia for their renowned high wire acts, China and North Korea for acrobats, and Mongolia and Russia for horse riders. (Interestingly, they don’t need to import bearded ladies.)

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  1. A. Mime
    Mar 6th, 2009 at 5:55 pm

    And now for something completely different…

  2. Clown Finder :)
    Mar 6th, 2009 at 6:04 pm

    Gordon Brown!!

  3. Kalel
    Mar 6th, 2009 at 6:59 pm

    Clown shortages are not funny.

  4. Pudifoot
    Mar 6th, 2009 at 7:21 pm

    I hope this doesn’t mean they are on the endangered list… I do so enjoy clown-hunting season.

  5. Edward
    Mar 6th, 2009 at 7:48 pm

    This is a joke, right?

  6. Evilbeagle
    Mar 6th, 2009 at 7:55 pm

    This is actually a good thing for me. Clowns give me the creeps.

  7. Johnny Cat
    Mar 6th, 2009 at 9:32 pm

    At least you didn’t use an image of a real, live, scary-ass clown, and I thank you for that.

  8. Victor Fricke
    Mar 7th, 2009 at 8:18 am

    Perhaps now would be the time for an Obama administration road trip. It solves two problems simultaneously; it gets them away from our economy for a while, and corrects the balance of clowns deficit. They could take Congress with them and do us all a favor.


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