Goths: Then and Now

After I chuckled heartily at Dan Piraro's depiction of the Fairy Gothmother in his awesome comic strip Bizarro, I wondered how goth today differs from the goths of yore. After a little research, I present to you this:

	Goth (of yesteryear)	Goth (of today)
Who	3rd and 4th centuries East Germanic tribe.	Kids dressed up like undertakers, complete with black eyeliners, nail polish, white face powder and so on
Origin	Scandinavia.	Early 1980s in the UK in the gothic rock scene
Feared by	The Romans and later, the Huns	Their parents, who feared social ostracism and high cosmetics bill, and the Russians government
Conquered by	The Byzantine Empire	Mean bullies at school
Likes	Warfare, sacrificing their vanquished to their god Tyz	Listening to gothic rock, playing dress ups, watching The Crow
Dislikes	The Romans and Huns	Tanning, being mistaken for Emo
Fashion accessories	Chain mail, swords, big axes and other weapons	Coffin-shaped things, piercings, pagan and Egyptian symbols, crosses, etc.
Similarity	Both have nothing to do with gargoyles and Gothic architecture (though they both may like the building style). At first, Gothic architecture was called "French Style" (Opus francigenum) by the Germans - I presume that was some sort of an insult. In the 1500s, the term "Goth" is a pejorative, meaning rude and barbaric. The Renaissance architects, who disliked the style, started calling it "Gothic" and the name stuck.

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Oh-the joy of finding this site. I am a Goth. Not the "no one understands me, I don't give a damn what people think, so I'm gonna be a rebel!" Goth, but an actual, friggin' GOTH. I'm 60% Swedish (not every Goth left the places they came from-Sweden, Poland, Ukraine, etc.), and don't appreciate these little shites runnin around playin dress up, and slandering my ancestor's good name. We Destroyed the Eastern Roman Empire's army and killed their fucking Emperor! We fucking sacked Rome-the first people to even come close to Rome since Hannibal and his Carthaginians, bitch! We created the client kingdoms that kept Italy from tearing itself apart! Quit whining that your parents don't love you and grow a pair! Why the hell did you even pick our name? Why not Vandals? Scythians? Roxolani? Alemanni? Lombards? Franks? Bulgars? Burgundians? Hell, call yourselves what you dress up like- Losers. Pathetic, annoying, losers, who-after highschool-are in for a rude awakening...Oh, the things you'll learn-such as; Life's a bitch, deal with it, Moving on. People suck-that's their problem. The government is a corrupt totalitarian system, yadda yadda, etc, hippie slander-whatever, growing a pair, moving on...Glad I could help.